My spouse and I will be staying with our in laws for a few months?

Question

Being that we are relocating in a few months, my inlaws were gracoius and kind to open thier home to us and stay in thier guest room.

What are ways we can be helpful to them and show kindness to them? They are not charging us rent so we can save for our move?

We all get a long well but thier may be some friction that we are staying there, what are ways we can show them that we are adults and what are constructive ways to give them space and not be in thier way?

We both work so we wont be around all day either. How can I make this a speical time to know my in laws better?

We want to show them that we are able to take care of ourselves and be mature, respectable and responsible living in thier home,
What are ways to bless them being they are not charging us rent?

Answer 1

You sound like a wonderful couple and are blessed to have your in laws welcome you. There are a ton of little ways you can show them your thanks. Give thanks for them in the prayer before meals, go to the grocery store and get their favorite things/household groceries without being asked, clean up after meals, do their laundry, take them out for an inexpensive dinner, do lawn work on the weekends, clean the bathrooms and common areas, etc. I'm sure they know how much you appreciate it; just always remember that you are the guest and this is their home (don't hog the bathroom, TV, computer, etc) and you should all get along just fine. Good luck and God Bless!

Answer 2

I am in the position of your in-laws. I have two married children and their spouses and children living with us rent free for an indeterminate amount of time. So my thoughts are from the other end of this discussion. I have also stayed with in-laws and have some thoughts on that near the end of my answer.

Here are some suggestions: Please keep in mind I don't them, you, or either's situation. Additionally I don't know the age or type of home you are dealing with.

Mow the lawn and keep the flowers up.
If either parent has some treat they really like, make sure there is always some around.
Steal a bill and pay it, garbage, gas, electric or anything of that nature. It should be house related.
Clean and organize the garden tool shed.
Sunday morning breakfast at a nice breakfast restaurant is great.
Detail their car.
Rent a pressure washer and work over the drive way and sidewalks.
Pick up and plant some plants. Ask questions first to be sure you are getting something they will like.
Offer to stand in line for them, such as you might have to do at DMV for a car registration.
Don't leave messes around their house.
Take them to the zoo.
Get them a new toy. Maybe an LCD monitor for their computer.

My recommendations are as far flung as I could make them, from free to expensive. I would have to know more about the situation to be more specific. Small things and random acts of kindness would be where I would put my attention. For example, when I retired from the Air Force we stayed with my in-laws. I did two things that my father-in-law would mention sometimes until the day he died. He was a diabetic and liked a particular candy that was diabetic friendly. He always had them in the bowl next to his computer. I made absolutely certain that bowl was never empty. I bought the stuff, hid the bag and topped off his bowl every morning. Second, he had a small workshop in the garage. He had at least ten coffee cans and a box full of random nuts, bolts, washers, screws etc. I bough a dozen transparent plastic boxes with lids. When I was done all that junk (invaluable bits and pieces to a tinkerer) was sorted and organized by type, size, composition or color. What ever method seemed appropriate. I did have to go get six more boxes but you should have seen the smile on his face when I showed him his brand new bench stock.

So that's about all I can offer. As a parent what I would like and as a visitor what I have done. If I can help further, and I would be delighted to, I can be reached through my profile.

And I have a pet peeve. The washer and dryer. They should never find your clothes there. I go to wash a load of clothes early in the morning and the washer is full, since last evening, and the dryer is full. That means I have to do their work before I can do mine. Oh yeah, I am a guy and I do laundry, all of it, whites, wife's work clothes, my work clothes and I fold and hang stuff too, no kidding.

Answer 3

The real question is, does she have ? Anywhere to go? To me this isnwhat you are not addressing. If she has no money or home and no way to get any then she would be very motivated to get rid of you and have son support her forever in exchange for babysitting. If you in an adult way try to understand her position you would be less likely to lose. And if you lose everyone loses. This generation is going to see this more and more, parents with no money. So, in an adult way, with the three of you working on this, face the reality and either help her find a position or accept she is here to stay and alter your own bad attitude. Anything that is done should put the kids first, not your own annoyance.

Answer 4

You can offer to help out around the house or buy groceries from your own money.

It's quite hard to make your in-laws feel that you're mature enough to live on your own. They will always think of you guys as children because they're much older than you are and they've experienced more than you have. Even though you guys get along, it doesn't mean that something negative won't happen. I would talk to them when your husband is there and try to ignore them as much as you can when you're by yourself. Usually, your in-laws will treat you better when your husband is there.

Answer 5

Buy groceries, help with laundry, keep the guest room clean. Respect their space and leave sometimes too so that you can have some private time without them. Make plans for special times for dinner-go on picnics, to dinner at a nice restaurant. Find activities in their city that they might not have visited-zoos, parks, etc. Be courteous and kind-act the way you would want a guest in your home to act. Look for ways to help. Fill their gas tanks once in awhile (that would be a big blessing!) Help with yardwork, etc.

Answer 6

Always treat yourself as a guest, meaning you can't get too comfortable. You should always make sure that you're not running up the electricity and water bill too high, cleaning up the house is a good way to thank them, and of course helping them in chores to make their lives easier.

Answer 7

me and my hubby were in the same situation just before we got married and got our own place. help out by doing washing up when they are not around, or cooking now and again, cleaning the bathroom etc. don't go overboard just a little to let them know. my in laws would not let me do anything and i wasn't used to living with a family, since leaving home 10 years before!

Answer 8

Respect house rules,do extra cleaning,cook meals a few nights a week.Rent a good movie and order take-out.Call it family night.(you pay for it)Or maybe you could cover one of the bills.You are going to be using their electricity,right?My sister-in-law did the same thing for us.I watched her kids,helped w/bills,purchased food,cleaned the house,bought dinner,etc.We are very close friends now.I adore her.We talk on the phone and laugh almost non-stop.Try to remember that the woman of the house is always"queen bee".Two queen bees cannot run one hive.

Answer 9

I would do little extra things like come home with a bag of groceries now and then, do dishes, help with yard work and laundry, etc.

Answer 10

How about bringing them out to dinner once a week? Or out to breakfast on sundays? :]