my very close pal fell out of love (if it were there at all to begin with) with an organised, professional, focused and independent lady. so he does the honarable thing and tells her and they agree to split. cool. but she is hanging around, she seems not to be moving on! its as if no break up took place. how does he let her off gently with finality without having to be a jerk and hurting her feelings?
2006-08-17 03:50:58 · 39 answers · asked by zinj 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well the goal seems to be to not embarrass her. So instead of saying "I've noticed you've been sticking around even though I dumped you", try an approach that includes the both of them. Like this:
"Remember that talk we had a few days ago, about breaking up? Well I'm starting to think about it again, and things just still aren't working out. I know we've been trying to go on as if everything is normal, but it's just feeling a little akward to me. I think in order to get over this relationship the both of us need to have a little space".
If that doesn't work, something is wrong with the lady.
2006-08-17 04:00:12 · answer #1 · answered by happyfarah88 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First, I will try to do not call her or email her.Go out with my friends,or try to make a new friends.If she try to come back with me, I will tell her that we can be only friends.If she try go out with me,I will say I am too busy doing others things.I can not feel guilty if we have an agreement.At the end, she will understand that is over.You know women are the most beautiful thing in this planet,and they are very smart too.Breaking up is a hard time always for both parts; and is taking time to healing the hearts...
2006-08-17 04:08:28 · answer #2 · answered by cobrasnake 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Women are bit blinded when it comes to love. Guys try and do the right thing and not try and hurt our feelings. Your pal needs to be honest and explain although he enjoys her company there is no possibility they will get back together. Be HONEST it is the most honarable thing to do.
2006-08-17 03:59:03 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well there is no absolute way this can come out nice in her eyes but here's what i suggest.....The key thing is to call her.If he does it face to face then looking in her eyes will make him feel bad.At that point my suggestion is to let her know that when they broke up that meant that there is now a space around them and he feels that she is invading it.Tell her he feels bad enough that he couldn't make things work but with her around all the time hes not getting the space he intended.Tell him not to express future friend ship and when the conversation ends, make sure that in a hard tone he says goodbye so and so.Also, tell him not to let her get to much in word wise.
2006-08-17 04:00:27 · answer #4 · answered by eve11en 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Break up's are not nice no matter how it is done. The important thing is not so much the actual brake up but what happens afterwards. He should be her friend and try to maintain that relationship. It means you may have to work a bit harder but it will pay off in the end.
2006-08-17 03:57:16 · answer #5 · answered by pinkdeck 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He needs to let her know the break must be complete and the future should not find the two of them together again. Period. Letting her hang around holds things in place and prevents reality from setting in.
2006-08-17 03:58:21 · answer #6 · answered by mr conservative 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sit her down and tell her that it really is over. be honest. say why. but be a gentleman about it.
if not then ur friend can bring a new girlfriend home so that the other will really see that the time has come to move on. this approach is more drastic though.
sadly, breaking up can rarely be done nicely. good luck! *^_^*
2006-08-17 03:56:59 · answer #7 · answered by psgr 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He needs to tell her that he does not feel comfortable with her continuing to come around. That it still feels like they are a couple and that he wants to move on. Her feelings are still going to be hurt no matter what, but he just have to be stern and tactful in how he say it.
2006-08-17 03:58:04 · answer #8 · answered by colleyshey 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes, you have to hurt someone's feelings so that they will start the process of getting over it which will be better for them in the long run. He needs to make how he is feeling clear and not encourage her to stick around.
2006-08-17 03:57:30 · answer #9 · answered by Chris D 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If she's hanging around and he's still treating her like he did before,they are not broken up yet. He needs to tell her that it is over and she should move on. Obvioiusly, he didn't get the message across to her because he was still acting like he didn't mean it.
2006-08-17 03:55:55 · answer #10 · answered by Wiser1 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋