She is married to a total loser who doesn't work, does drugs, is in and out of jail, disappears for days on drug binges, free-loads off his wife and contributes nothing to the household. We have been telling her to drop this loser for years but nothing seems to work. Her co-workers, her best friends, her family all advise her to leave him but she just won't. Why does she continue to do this? Could this be a deep rooted psychological problem with her? Or is she just plain stupid?
2006-08-17 03:19:13 · 10 answers · asked by Kimmy 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
It could be a lot of things. She could love him too much or she could be afraid of leaving him. You should ask her what makes her stay. She would probably appreciate someone to confide in and may also need help in leaving him.
2006-08-17 03:25:11 · answer #1 · answered by nastaany1 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever thought that when there are good times between them the joy is greater than you can imagine?? Weakness in a person in some parts of life does not mean they cannot be strong in other areas. Instead of condemning her for sticking to her man why not ask why?? That way a useful conversation can take place. People judge without enough information. The addiction and dejection faced by the loser must leave something that keeps her coming back for more.
2006-08-17 03:28:07 · answer #2 · answered by mr conservative 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your sister is not stupid. She does have a problem with her selfesteem.Why is she settling for this type of a person? Exactly who in the family concerns themselves with her problem? Maybe she doesn't think much of herself, and believes this is what she deserves. Obviously she's not putting herself first. She's also trying to get something out of him that he's not capable of giving. Why do you think she cares about someone who don't care about her? As the saying goes "love is a 2 way street".
2006-08-17 03:42:19 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Change is hard. Even in situations where the woman is being abused, it very hard to step away from the situation, and look at it from an objective perspecitve -- that we as observers have.
Instead of asking her to leave this person, It may be a better idea to ask her to go on a vacation with her friends or go somewhere else where she is away from the situation, and can think about it objectively.
2006-08-17 03:27:23 · answer #4 · answered by kp 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When she does dump him it has to be up to her, not you. You have a relationship with your husband and are in no danger (apparently) of losing your identity as a married woman. Some women can't live with that though (being single again). It scares them more than living with a drug addict who won't work. I've asked your question myself several times over about similar situations.
2006-08-17 03:30:12 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's probably psychological.
maybe she feels she can't get anyone else
maybe she feels her worth is very low and deserves only him
she doesnt want to make a change in her life
she is scared to leave because of what he may do
she likes the treatment she recieves from him.
some women like to be treated like trash, some like to be beaten. i know because i have friends like this. you need to ask her why she is with this loser. but you or no one else can make her leave him. She has to realize and open her eyes on her own because she is on the inside looking out and you all are on the outside looking in. she cannot see anything. she has to make the decision for herself and when she gets tired of it, she will leave him.
2006-08-17 03:34:40 · answer #6 · answered by ♣DreamDancer♣ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is acting stupid but she may not be stupid. We all can act stupid when we are in love.
If it has been years she may not be in love with him anymore, but she may be too proud to dump him. She may not want to admit everyone has been right all along. It is hard to admit you are wrong and hear "I told you so."
Hopefully if everyone is more supportive of her, she may get the nerve to dump the bum.
Good luck, it must be hard for you to watch her stuck with that jerk.
2006-08-17 03:42:00 · answer #7 · answered by Patti C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ya..she may looked stupid to stick to a loser .....BUT she epitomised the meaning of true love...believing he will change one day.
2006-08-17 03:32:24 · answer #8 · answered by Phantom of the Opera 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
deep rooted psychological prob
2006-08-17 03:25:37 · answer #9 · answered by Echo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love is a crazy thing.
2006-08-17 03:25:12 · answer #10 · answered by matt_zim2006 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋