My friend has twin boys, 3yrs old. she also became pregnant with triplets, ywere people mean to her about it?

Question

When out in public, while she was still prego, my friend would be asked, "awww, what are you having?"
she would reply, triplets, 2 girls and a boy.
they would then look at the twin boys she already had, and reply extremely rudely, like she was bad for having so many kids
first of all, what business is it of theirs?
second, she was on birth contol both times! its not like she said, hey lets have multiples again!
third, she is a married, grown woman with a good career. who cares how many kids she has?!
Why would people be so rude to her? if you were a person who encountered her while she was pregnant, would you just be surprised at her situation, happy for her, or would you think shes crazy or a bad person for some reason? if any of you have any ideas WHY people would be rude to her like that, i would love it if you could shed some light on the situation.
by the way, all triplets were born. two are doing well, the third is struggling, but we believe she will pull through.

Answer 1

I think that would be so exciting! I think every pregnant mom secretly has a twin fantasy at least once during pregnancy. And that's incredible that she was blessed with multiples without even trying.

I think that people are ignorant, and just automatically assume that if someone is having more than one at a time, then they were using all kinds of fertility drugs, and if the have more than..oh, say 2 kids, that they're on welfare.

And some people think that it's irresponsible to have any children at all based on how the 'world is today.' But I don't think they think about what would happen if no one had any kids anymore until the world was all better and everyone was friends.

If I had encountered her during pregnancy, and she told me about her triplets, I would have probably said how great that was, and wondered if they'd picked out names yet. My boyfriend and I took months to pick out a name, and we only had to do one!

And if it was me in her situation, I probably would have said something equally rude right back. Maybe something along the lines of 'Well, I'm going to have a large family so that people like you don't have to breed.' Or just whatever came to mind right then.

Congratulations on the birth of her triplets, and we are all hoping that the little girl has a speedy recovery and they can all be together at home soon.

Answer 2

I had triplets my second pregnancy, and got lots of greif from people about it. I already had a nine year old daughter. So many people asked me why I wanted four kids, and why would I even try again after nine years. But I find that I get more rude remarks now, I am pregnant (just one baby) and when I am out with my kids (esp. the triplets) people ask why would I want another kid, aren't I happy with my kids that I have now. And I just respond that I love the children I have now, and there is nothing wrong with having another child if my husband and I both want one, and we are financially stable and were prepared that we may have gotten multiples again.

Good luck to the little girl, my girl struggled but she pulled through, and I'm sure your friends little one will too!

Answer 3

First of all, I'll say a prayer for the triplets, especially the girl. I don't know why people would be rude. Honestly, I would probably give a surprised look and say wow and something like "you'll have your hands full." I'm a mom of one and I want my kids to be about 3-4 years apart. She didn't purposely try to have triplets. If I have happen to have twins or triplets with my next pregnancy I don't want people being rude to me. Some people are just so ignorant. I don't know why people can't just say "Congratulations!" By the way, Congratulations to your family! :)

Answer 4

First off, if she wanted a big family, then congrats to her. Better to get it all out of the way in one fell swoop. :) Second of all, people are obviously entitled to their own opinions, but they should remember not to judge. If she is well established and happy and is able to provide for her kids, then far be it from anyone else to judge having what other people term as "too many children". They are obviously ignorant and close minded of what your friend is encountering. Besides what is the point of being rude? It's not like anybody wakes up one morning when they are planning a family and says, "Wow! I think I want to have multiple birth more than once in my life..." Children are little miracles and if God saw fit that your friend have 5 children as a result of multiple births, then that's exactly what should be happening in her life. Who cares what other people think or believe. Tell her congrats and good luck with her beautiful babies!

Answer 5

I would be so surprised that she was blessed for both pregnancies. I was at my daughters pediatrician and this woman comes in with two sets of twins one set is 1 year an dthe other set is 8 weeks. I don't know how she does it. Kudos to your friend t putting up with these rude people. I think some people just don't know how to respond because people don't see women with more than one set of multiples very often. They respond by asking the wrong questions and displaying themselves as rude. Remind your friend that for every i rude person there should be at least 5 "wowed" people.

Answer 6

First of all Poor thing. She has alot of hard days coming. I hope you will be a big help. She will need alot.
Second of all will pray for the baby girl. I hope she will be fine.

When I say poor thing I am not meaning she is wrong to have 5 children under the age of 3 it is just alot of work, alot of money.
I don't care if she has the best job in America. Her number one job is those children. Which will cost alot and be so much work for just a husband and wife.

I couldn't imagine. I only have two children and dang my husband and I work so hard to provide for them.
I think when you see people act rude about your sister having 5 children under age 3. They are just worried about those children. The divorce rate is 50/50. They worry is the mother fit to take care of those children in another year when they are all needing that attention.
I am not saying she has a death sentence. Children are wonderful. I wish I could have 10 of my own. I know however I would be selfish to do that. I couldn't provide the kind of life I want for them.
She will I am sure have enough help the next few months. I hope know one drops her when she really needs the help in a few years.
Great Question.

Answer 7

Well I hope that the little one pull through and start doing great. But in response to your question I think that it is society that has changed greatly. It seem like since women have started to become a strong force in the work place people think they we are not suppose to get pregnant anymore.
See in our grandmother and Mothers days it was great to have a big family. My grandma had 8 of her own and all of my aunts and uncles have upto 4 to 7 children themselves. My co worker is the 1st of 11 brothers and sister.
But now it is like a woman is suppose to have 1 or 2 children and that is . Once you get your boy and girl that is the end of the program. And I know how you feel about people being rude about the amount of children your friend is having. My husband being an only child (his mother not being able to have any more after him and died a very early death) He wants to have a big family like mine. I have 2 brothers and 2 sister and I am in the middle boo hoo lol. He says he would like about 6 or 7 children but we will only have them if we can support them. When I tell people that we have 5 or 6 more children to go to complete our family they look at us like we have lost our minds. But like someone post earlier Children are a blessing from God.

So don't worry about stupid people who think any children that after the 1st and 2nd are too many. The bigger the litter the better.
:-)

Answer 8

People are rude no matter what.. and in today's age where small families are all the rage, people with large families are looked down on for some reason.. I don't know what it is. I think babies are a blessing from God..

Perhaps they think your friend took fertility meds to have multipes or something... it has been increasingy thought as of late that women having multiples are going to be a burden on society.. that they are going to cry " I can't do it " and look to .. Oprah for help...

Congratulations to your friend. I hope that poor little girl pulls through alright. She has my prayers.

Answer 9

People are the same to me and my husband, b/c we have a 2 1/2 year old, 10 month old, and I'm pregnant with our third child due Oct.3rd. I think they stare and are rude b/c I'm only 21 years old and my husband Is 26 years old, but what they don't see Is two really hard working people, I'm a stay-at-home mommy and my husband works 50+ hours a week as an electrician, so I can stay home, three days a week I go to night school for pharmacy technician b/c that's what I want to do after I have my baby, we look at our life as we are extremely blessed from GoD to have such beautiful and healthy children, people are going to be rude, It's like they think they pay our bills or they raise them, nobody pays for our children's bill and know one raises them just me and my husband. Just tell your friend to ignore them, I know It's hard their are days when I want to start screaming at people and ask them what they are looking at, but I know I'm older and more mature then they are and that the life that grows inside of me Is life from GoD and so are our two boys. (( Tell your friend to keep her chin up, and I wish the best of speedy recovery for the beautiful baby girl

Answer 10

I would never be rude to any pregnant woman, regardless of how many children she had. I would actually feel sorry for her, wondering how the poor thing would cope with *3* newborns at once, and a set of older twins too, LOL.

Maybe people assume that since she has so many children, she's using welfare to support them, and it angers them? I don't know. Maybe they're jealous because they're infertile and she's obviously a Fertile Myrtle. :D

Glad the babies are doing well, and I'll pray for the little one.