My mothers mental abuse is unbearable?

Question

My mother plays games to ruin your day, your marriage your mental health. I believe she is unconsciously trying to make herself feel needed and therefore better about herself. I can't take it anymore. Her depression and controller and abusive behavior is killing my spirit

Answer 1

well take a step back then...either tell her you need some space or just limit the time that you see her to holidays and if that is even metally unberable then i think it might be time to cut the strings and focus just on you and your husband...its harsh but misery loves company and she is trying to bring you down to the level that she is feeling so she doesn't feel alone...or maybe in her sick little way she like to see noone else succeed in life but her...i was in your boat once not with my own mother but my ex-boyfriends and it only led us to separate one month before we were planning on getting married...i would seriously think about putting some distance between you two for awhile

Answer 2

Do you live with your mother? If so, this might be one of the problems. Especially if you're married. You mention her depression and controlling behavior, are you sure you do not have the same problem? Sometimes mental illnesses are passed down from generation to generation. This could also be a sign of Bipolar disorder with both of you! Most of times the one who feels like they are being controlled by someone else is usually the one who wants to be in control of everything. You might want to consider this. maybe take a closer look at the whole situation. Maybe there is a way that both of you can work together knowing that you both might have the problem.

Answer 3

My Mom use to do the same stuff don't let her bring you down her problems are her problems let her deal with the bull you know my mom used to make me almost lose my mind she seemed to get enjoyment off of ruining my life. I just acted like it had no affect on me she would yell and cry go physo I just didn't let her bring me down I don't know how old you are or if you still live with her but if you still live with her remember soon you will be out and if you already moved out when she starts her stuff just start telling her how you feel or start getting really distant don't let her know so much about your life the more she knows the more bullsssshhhhiiiiitttt she can give you keep it short and sweet she's miserable so she wants you the same I know exactly how you feel my Mom is the same way Its like she will be all nice for a week or two and I will tell her something I shouldn't have and she would act all understanding and then like a week later use it against me I just learned to keep it short and not so sweet with her and not let her affect me as bad good luck start taking a stand it feels good and she will have a ssshhiiitttt fit when ya do wish I could see it good luck peace

Answer 4

Make sure your mom is taking her medication.
Unfortunatly the Highs and Lows are the worse.
Disconnect.

Answer 5

Going through SAME crap with MY mother.. I've started not answering phone or emails.

Answer 6

tell her what you are feeling then give her a few days to think it over if she doesn't want to make things better with you then distance yourself and your family from her. you can love her but hate the things she does and it doesn't mean you have to endure them

Answer 7

Either confront her and explain your angst or totally avoid her, tune her out, or move away.

Answer 8

don't talk to her then

if you don't live at home, why talk to her if she just brings you down?

Answer 9

backhand that hobag!