My mother-in-laws is dying of liver cancer. I quit my job to help her and her husband out. My problem is I can't get any of the family to help out. They use the excuse that they work. I sit around most days and watch her slipping away and I could use a brake.
2006-08-16 17:57:25 · 12 answers · asked by Carmen S 2 in Health ➔ Diseases & Conditions ➔ Cancer
Sweetie
Sorry to hear about your MIL, God Bless, I hope she has the strength to get through this, and you too!
I know what you mean. I had a baby that was 12mos old when my mum passed away.
She lived with my bro and his family, they worked, I didn.t
It still took a toll on me, with the baby and my mum dying.
I would take her to radiation everyday, I would spend a lot of time in the hospital.
Its hard, but you know you are truly appreciated by that.
Let some of htem know you need a break...tell them that it is taking a lot out of you and you would like a day off.
I know that sounds bad.
I was with my mum tons, and a couple times I would get a away for a few hrs...
ughghg
God Bless
prayers
2006-08-17 03:56:43 · answer #1 · answered by riverstarr 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry. My mother cared for my fathers mother when she was dying of cancer. Even after my grandmother treatedher like dirt all those years. she appreciated it in the end. but it was hard. My dad had five brothers and sisters and not one would lift a finger. I was 13 and had to sit with her jsut so my mom could have a nights rest. If there is no turning back then I hope you mother in law goes swiftly and as painlessly as possible. these things are very hard on the caregiver. by the way there state help in most states. CAll DHS and ask about having someone come by each day. (I think it is called a provider, my mom did it for a while)Also try hospice services. Good luck.
2006-08-16 18:07:41 · answer #2 · answered by JENNLUPE 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, God bless your efforts.
I was the only one that stepped forward when my mother-in-law was also dying. I contaced the cancer society and they were incredibly helpful in guiding me and what to expect. You should also contact Hospice in your area. They will come over for a morning or whenever for you to get out and do some errands or get a haircut. And when it's over, you will be at peace and have no regrets. And think about how much you love your husband. You are doing this for him.
It's so tough. I feel for ya. I also think that avoiding the situation is a form of denial where his sibs are concerned. Maybe you are the best choice in dealing with this. They cant handle it.
2006-08-16 18:11:12 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am really sorry that your mother=in-law is dieing first of all. I am hoping that your husbands family have the change of heart in helping you. You must be very stressed out. Talk to your husband and let him know how you feel. Suggest for him to call hospice for help. Just hang in there . I am hoping that your husband appreciates everything that your doing for his mom. I wish you well. Remember we do have a god, and his rewards for you will soon be seen.
2006-08-16 18:08:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel.It's very stressful taking care of someone who is dying of cancer.I took care of my husband,then my mother and now my boyfriend who is 58.I really don't know how i have done this for so long without any help.A lot of times i just sit down and have a good cry when he's sleeping.Hang in there you will be awarded by god.My thoughts and prayers are with you
2006-08-17 16:02:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
caring for someone who's deing is stressful, but if no one will help u, have perseverance. Remember to put urself on the shoes of ur mother in law, im sure ud want to die with someone beside u too taking care of you. What u do to others could come around in the future..
2006-08-16 18:15:09 · answer #6 · answered by angel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to your husband and come to an agreement about the help.
Then with his support call a family meeting (with out the parents) and explain the situation. They should be spending time with her before she goes anyways.
Sorry about the bad news, good luck!
2006-08-16 18:09:44 · answer #7 · answered by misscanada_y2k 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If no one will help I feel for you .have had more than one family member die of cancer not easy to go thru esp. with no help. Pray that God give u the strength u need to do this compassionate deed He will reward u in due time God Bless.
2006-08-16 19:11:45 · answer #8 · answered by la kira 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sorry, to hear that! got my father-in-law dead last year from colon cancer and we had to suffer same as you are now. the only advise i can give you is to be more patient and the only thing you can give actually is some quality time with the sick. there are some pain killers which a doctor can prescribe for pain management of terminally ill patient. and lastly, someday you will be rewarded for your sacrifices as it is a proven fact that for all our actions there is a reward.
2006-08-16 18:09:35 · answer #9 · answered by Rynald 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call in Hospice
Or ask her doctor to get you some home health nursing.
That will give you the break you need...
and the care that your mother in law needs
2006-08-16 18:02:42 · answer #10 · answered by PreviouslyChap 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋