How do you cope with the hostility from others who preferred the fatter you?

Question

I gained weight during my college years, and then went on a yo yo dieting spree for many years (from 19 to 26). Sometimes I'd be thin, other times I'd be anywhere from 20 to 60 lbs overweight. Something clicked last year and I've FINALLY been able to maintain my weight loss.

I've been at a reasonable weight for almost a year now. The only problem is, the people who I thought cared about me seem to have turned on me. My mom flat out told me that she doesn't like skinny people (I'm nowhere near skinny by the way). Other relatives joke about me looking like a crackhead (I am 130 lbs, 5'2, so thats BS). Friends of mine who started the diet with me but didn't quite make it are avoiding me. On top of all that, I had to let go of a romantic interest I had held onto for SO long.

It's a hurtful situation but I wouldn't trade this feeling for anything in the world. At the same time, I stll have 10 more lbs to go and all this negativity coming from others has made me lose a lot of motivaton.

Answer 1

Trust me on this one! They are all just jealous. One of my best friends made a crack about how I couldn't wear a smaller skirt because my belly would hang over it. This from someone who thinks that if she works out once in a blue moon that she's working hard. I was extremely skinny when I was growing up and into my 20s. I got my boobs done when I was 32 to feel better about myself. The problem was, my weight started creeping on. I had surgery and shot up to 145 (I'm 5'7"). I had weighed 135 beforehand. I have since dropped from 145 to 124. I feel better about myself than I have in a LONG time. Unfortunately, I just had gallbladder surgery and a right tubal ligation done two weeks ago and I'm slowly getting my butt back in gear but now I have some more lovely scars to look at. (lol) My other best friend is my biggest cheerleader. She tells me how great she thinks I look while my other friend just has to be nasty. My family is a little nasty about too. My family wants me to hang it up because I'm too old to try to get in shape. (I'm 37.) I just try to ignore them and go on with my life. Try not to let them get you down. Good luck and take care.

Answer 2

They are jealous of you and feel that the skinnier you get and the better you look the less you will need and care about them.

You are doing great...ignore them. You are doing what is best for you, don't let them discourage you and talk you out of it. Next time Mom says she does not like skinny people, ask her is she wants you to live a short, unhappy life or she would rather you stay away?

Congratulations on your weight loss and keep it up. If you don't put you first, no one else will. Tell them how you feel about their comments. They are being nasty and ignorant.

Answer 3

Lesson to me! These people are jealous. And once you lose those 10 pounds you are going to look so good that you can get someone else to love you. You can also find good friends. You don't need backstabbers. Prove your family and friends wrong. They are just trying to bring you down so you can end up fat again. You need to prove them wrong and show them being skinny is a good thing and your weight is healthy. Your mom is putting you down and that is very mist up. Don't lesson to them. If you need motivation I will give you motivation. You are going to look fantastic when you lose those 10 pounds and you can wear all of these flirty outfits with your nice new figure. Show the world what your made of.

Answer 4

I hate haters!! I've lost some weight and I'm in great shape now too, so I can wear things that I haven't been able to wear in a while. When I go out to eat with my, uhmm, HEFTIER friends, I order a salad or something healthy and they try to criticize and get me to eat something fattening along with them. It's because they are jealous. Sorry, but you need to do what makes you happy, and not give in to the insecurity of your family and so-called friends. If they love you, then they will support you in your personal goals. (Who knows, they may even gain motivation from you to become more fit themselves!) Don't be discouraged, just make new friends who have positive attitudes and who support you and have similiar goals to stay slender. Good luck. ☺

Answer 5

Pff, don't care about any negative comment you hear from other ppl, just do as you like although if you ever get too skinny, you should gain weight (but you say you arent so thats not aproblem)

and your friends that avoids you, theyre just jealous of you making it. That tells you right there you're looking much better

Answer 6

It's a sad fact that some people are not able to celebrate the victories of others. They are jealous and mean spirited. I am proud of you!! Continue to listen to their rude remarks without letting it get to you. After awhile, they'll find someone else to be rude to and forget about being disrespectful to you.

Answer 7

mayb yr parents are worried tat u might b losing weight the unhealthy way. as for yr frds who started the diet with u but didn't quite make it are avoiding u.. perhaps they feel bad for giving up so soon, or just jealous tat u r slimmer than they are rite now?

remember it is yr own life... do wat u want with it so long as it doesnt hurt anyone. be strong! wish u all the best!

Answer 8

well, just be yourself. don't care what people say just be yourself! and about the weight thing, just be the weight you like. push onward! never give up!