70 yr old mom - abusive situation with her husband - doesn't want help?????????? what can I do?

Question

Had her leave ten years ago but came back in a week

Answer 1

Have you ever spoke to her husband about it? She doesn't want help because she could be afraid of many things.
(UK stats):
13% fear more violence or that their situation will just get worse
41% think it's too trivial to report
28% think it's best to be kept within the family
7% don't want any more humiliation.

What you can do, is let her know that you're there for her. Don't leave her alone at times like this.
Don't say things to her like "she's crazy for staying", because this'll just make her feel more guilty.
She may be frightened of what others will think or say about her, so be as helpful and friendly as possible.
Offer her helpline numbers or other contacts to let her know she has support. Offer her a place to stay in an emergency, but don't let yourself become in danger.

I don't know whereabouts you are, but here are some contacts within the UK:
Freephone 24 National Domestic Violence Hotline: [phone]
www.womensaid.org.uk
www.refuge.org.uk

Good luck, and I have more information if you need any. :)

Answer 2

Most counties/cities have a hotline to report
abuse anonymously. Some even have a special
number for the elderly (over 65). I'm guessing
you spoke to her and she doesn't wish to accept that she has a problem and refuses to
get out of the situation. If she is mentally
capable of making her choice to stay or go, then
there is probably not a lot you can do beyond
an anon. call, which may or may not result in
anything. If she is mentally unstable, maybe
you could enlist assist from her doctor. Some
times people chose to punish themselves by
tolerating abuse, but that would be her choice
to do. Otherwise, all you can do is keep your
distance so you don't get sucked into her
chosen misery, but keep the door open so that
if she decides to help herself, she knows she
can come to you. Hope this helps, good luck!

Answer 3

When he is abusive to her if it is the bodily type take her to the doctor. get plenty of pictures and have his butt thrown in jail.. she is 70 years old no one should be saying anything at all bad to her or treating her bad at this age.. there is time when a son , daughter or best friend must step in.. You may not be able to get her to leave him but you can sure get him away from her legally through going to the police dept. and turning him in for abuse..
they have places where they can go also.. take her home with you and tell him that if he don't straighten up you will turn him in..
your mother will be safe and so will he when he is put in a jail cell for a while. maybe it will just snap him out of it.. when he knows that he won't get away with ilt all the time.

verbal abuse is just as bad as physical abuse.. remember she has a right to be safe from this man weather he is her husband or not.
good luck i hope you do something soon before he hurts her really bad.

Answer 4

Gal you're in basic terms 33 and are rather knowledgeable. you do no longer would desire to sense petrified of the destiny. i can understand, that not one of the ladies folk thinks approximately this characteristic until eventually finally they have have been given adequate of it. So at the start, look ahead to yet another abuse from the gentleman worry no longer from dialing a hundred and deliver this guy at the back of bars for an afternoon or 2 until eventually finally 7 years a woman can cost the guy and his kin on dowry subjects on which divorce would be granted honestly meanwhile initiate finding for a job. initially a job will recommend any interest, even in a BPO seek for a PG close on your mum and dad in the event that they show issues, conserving you in case you will possibly have have been given an FIR and can have framed dowry subjects, getting a divorce would be rather much less complicated or you may describe the aftermaths of the criminal thoughts on your in regulations and this guy. in the event that they may be wiser adequate they'll comply with choose for mutual contract. each and all of the terrific

Answer 5

Be there for her. Call the cops as often as possible. So that there is a record of the abusive situation. get her brochures from organizations that can shelter her so she knows that she has options.

Answer 6

She requires consoling and treatment. Obviously she has lost control over her emotions. You are the best judge. Morally one should be kind to old persons but in such situation you may get her mental check up.

Answer 7

Seems like it might just be the dynamic for their relationship. My grandparents fought their whole lives like cats and dogs. She may not be able to live without him. Just be there for her if she wants you to. I don't think you can do anything about it. I know you don't want to hear that. But if it's interfering with your life then step out of it. You can't live someone elses life and you won't be able to change this. Good luck !!

Answer 8

At that age, in Ohio at least, you can get Senior Services involved. Call a Senior Center for the number, they can get you a counselor.

Answer 9

Legally if an geriatric person goes to the hospital and abuse is suspected they have to notify the police. So get her to an hospital or doctors office they have to report it.

Answer 10

Guess she figures where is she going to go...Thats sad
My father was being abused by mom but she has alzheimers...is that possible with your situation...Good luck convincing her