A highest level of commitment in a relationship? I.E Was married for about 16 years in a very mentally abusive relationship. Now i dont want to be anymore then a boyfriend to any woman. Dont want to be trapped in that way ever again. Is it ok to draw the line there? Im fine with a committed relationship just not married again.
2006-08-16 11:40:06 · 16 answers · asked by Titanic 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I totally understand your predicament. I was also in a very mentally and emotionally abusive relationship for 13 1/2 years. I eventually met a man that made me believe I could be happy within the boundaries of marriage again. We have been married for 3 years and going strong. I have never been happier.
2006-08-16 11:47:55 · answer #1 · answered by I love my husband 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well thats your personal decision. If you feel that you do not want to be in a marriage, than you have to talk to your girlfriend about that. She might agree with it, or she might want to get married, start a family. But you need to speak with your girlfriend first, and let her know how you feel, and that you dont want to be involved in a life time commitment marriage. Just tell her. You have to be open about any situation.
But you have to remember that not every girl is like your ex wife. I dont know what happend between you and your exwife. But the girl that you meet, might be complelly different than what you have in mind and that might change your mind to get married again. I mean you and your ex wife maybe didnt have a good understanding, I mean there are alot of reasons, but you cant be afraid of marriage just becuz of what happend. You might get married again, but have the best marriage experience in your life. So you never know what will happen, Just dont be afraid of your past. People are different. YOu cant run away from that. You have to face that, and pass through that.
So give it some time, and you will know what you want to do with your life when the time is right.
Good Luck!
2006-08-16 11:51:05 · answer #2 · answered by Happily Married 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you do get a commited relationship that you truly believe in, what is the difference if you have the legal papers and ring, or not. The woman is entitled to the same things if you are married or not, as long as you live together. Or will you live separately and still be the little boy, and not trust your toys to anyone.
2006-08-16 11:47:41 · answer #3 · answered by oddbutterfly1 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont let the word marriage control your feelings on commitment. its just a title and a few extra things u have to fill out on ur tax forms. the same thing could happen in a b/f/g/f relationship its all about the person not the label
2006-08-16 11:46:55 · answer #4 · answered by knd25th 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course it is ok to have a level of relationships that you are comfortable with. As long as you let anyone you are dating know the rules, you are playing fair. That doesn't mean she won't get her heart broken if you are wonderful and she falls in love, but you have been honest from the start and I give you high points for that.
2006-08-16 11:45:43 · answer #5 · answered by swarr2001 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Its ok if you don't want to get married. I understand that you are going through something horrible right now. This is completely normal. If someone is worth marrying, then you might change your mind but its ok to think that for now. There are some girls that don't want to get married either.
2006-08-16 11:45:32 · answer #6 · answered by Pinky 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Just state your business up front
when getting involved. That's what I do.
I had the same situation, and I
learned that life is too short to get
trapped. So, just be yourself, be honest,
and make the best of it! Make yourself
as happy as possible without hurting others!
Best of luck!
2006-08-16 12:02:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as the women you are with understands and is ok with not getting married, I see no problem, you just need to let that be known up front.
2006-08-16 11:46:11 · answer #8 · answered by mightymight 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is just fine,married is only a paper anyway,it isn't going to make anyone love you,treat you better, or stay with someone . i would rather have someones heart, and devotion,and friendship, than a paper that said they have to love me or stay with me for all the wrong reasons.
2006-08-16 11:47:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
so you want the milk and not buy the cow?? I understand not wanting a new commitment right now but wait for awhile you might see things differently.
2006-08-16 11:46:08 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋