We've all lived in the same huge house for over a year and are all happy. She's on welfare and is having his baby in September. He owes hundreds of thousands of dollars in restitution for a crime he commited when he was 21 (12 years ago) and he works for "cash under the table".
Her dad wishes she was not having this baby out of wedlock but doesn't know about my brother's past.
I advised her many times not to marry my brother because she'd be marrying his debt too. She'll be a college graduate next year. She said maybe she'd marry him but not legally on paper, just a ceromony.
One month has gone by since our last conversation and he has proposed to her and she accepted. All I said was I heard he proposed to her and congratulations.
I have already stated my opinion on the subject and now I want to be careful not to hurt anyone's feelings. What should I do or say, or definately don't do or say?
I just want to keep the peace and want the awkwardness to go away.
2006-08-16 03:34:28 · 11 answers · asked by icu812 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Don't say anything anymore. She heard your advice and she made her decision. They're both adults and take care of themselves.
Even though if they marry legally, they can both sign a premarital agreement (prenuptial agreement). They both have to hire their own lawyers. On this agreement, they can detail what is considered marital property and what not, and also regarding the debts they should be able to state that they keep seperate each others debts before the marriage.
2006-08-16 03:48:35 · answer #1 · answered by Natalie 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This is between your brother and his fiance. Obviously this girl must like him enough to marry him even after she heard your warning, so she must love him very much. You should be proud of her; and you'll get a sister in the process too, and a niece or nephew! Good things happen when you think it's bad. Tomorrow never knows!
2006-08-16 03:59:42 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
There's nothing you can say. It's not your place. You've warned her once and now she ahs to take it from there. If you keep after her about it you will lose both her and your brother and probably be asked to move out. You can congratulate them and let them lead their own lives, as frustrating as it may be for you.
2006-08-16 06:07:25 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
1 way to keep from awkwardness is to butt your nose out of their business. Hunny, it is their lives. They love each other and obviously she doesn't care too much about his past. You need to let them live their lives and just be happy for them. You are better off not getting involved in it because if something goes sour you will get blamed...
2006-08-16 05:11:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's their life. There are worse things than debt and it is nice to make the baby legitimate. They are not kids, so they are on their own. You said your peace, now move on from here.
2006-08-16 04:14:28 · answer #5 · answered by Ricky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that the best way to keep the peace is to be supportive of them. Show her that even though at first you didn't think she should marry him - now that she is, you still support and care about both of them.
2006-08-16 04:26:03 · answer #6 · answered by ykokorocks 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They both sound like real winners. Perhaps you should move out and let them wallow in the fact that they are not productive members of society.
2006-08-16 06:00:03 · answer #7 · answered by Laura N 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know that you can't stop what you have no control over. In the eyes of the law they can do it and there is nothing you me or her dad can do about it. I know this is no comfort but maybe they love each other.
2006-08-16 04:16:24 · answer #8 · answered by Celeste P 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have said your peace and now it is up to her. Unfortunately she is not willing to open up her eyes to reality. Now your job is to make sure your niece or nephew is protected as it is going to have to grow up in all of this mess.
Good luck!
2006-08-16 03:52:52 · answer #9 · answered by Raspberry 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
1 way 2 make the akwardness go away is for u to mind ur business and find ur own place to live instead of being in their business.
u care for ur bro then that's all good, but it's just ur opinion that ur expressing and u have valid points but what u say is not law, and they r grown so they don't have to listen to u or do as ur say.. that is their life to ruin.. all u can do now is lay in the cut and wish them well instead of putting them down..
focus on ur life and let them focus on theirs...
2006-08-16 03:42:08 · answer #10 · answered by Queen D 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋