do u have advice due to ex boyfriend? i need help and im very confused help me plz?

Question

we was together for 2 years and been seperated for 7 months he had left to DR for a vacation before he had left we was talking on the phone everyday he even called when he left and told me i love you .i love him too but we both ain't looking for a relationship now but i still want him he was my first for everything i knew him since we was 14 . well he came back last week after 2 months on vaction he called me just like he said . but he came and actin like a *** saying that he took a gurl from ova there and fu** her i felt like killin him then after 2o min he said supposely that he was lieing now i don't know to beleive him i didn't but now he actin wierd he actin likea gentlemen like when we was first going out he is not the same i mean he could be a gentlemen i loves that about him but he came back weird from DR i told him i don't know him he told me that he thought about i ask good or bad he said good but im confused . he ask me to be honest and tell him if i was with someone

since he left i told him no . i still love him but its wierd do u think he has a gurl i mean he stop talking to me nasty like in sexual so its weird help me plz im confused why do he care about my life when he wants to i need help please help me i might see him next week in my cuzin baby shower so i told him we gonna stop all these lies and speak the truth but what should i o my family calls me a sucker i told him that i was dead to him when he told he did something with a gurl i hang up and then he called back sayin it was alie but i don't know what to think because now he actin like when we first got 2 gether plz help

when he try to call me back after i hang up i pick up and said what happen then he said that im stupid that how am i going to beleive him i told him that now its hard for me to know if he lies or not unless i see him face to face after that we talk on the phone just as friendz . but what do u think he love me so much but me i use to act stupid with him sometimes but i just don't know im afraid to loose him i stop talkun to him but he always happen to pull me back in please help me

Answer 1

He was gone for two months, he was with someone else and thought you had been too. Men tend to think that sex rules our world like it rules theirs, so he just knew you were getting busy while he was getting busy. Now that you said you weren't he's feeling guilty because he knows he was wrong. But since you said EX, you broke up before he left so it wasn't cheating. You have to remind yourself why you broke up. Yes, those first loves will burn a hole in us, but it doesn't mean there's no life after them. Lack and trust and/or communication makes it hard to have a relationship with anyone. And NO relationship should have that much DRAMA. You may want to remain friends but that can only happen after you know you don't want to jump in the sack with him, when all the feelings are gone, then you can be friends; otherwise, say your goodbyes knowing it could be forever. Embrace your memories and move on.

Answer 2

he may have been trying to tell the truth but when you hung up on him and he called back,kinda sounds like he still wants to be friends or even just still have the convienance of being able to screw you if he needs or has a back up plan if he has another girl that things don't work out with,he seems to be acting different which from what you should be able to see and all people know it,is that a girl changes men in all sorts of ways without either knowing it or intentionaly,they have to have it there way,i know that sounds bad but take a look at how he is different now to what he was.so yeah hope you have good luck with this but be prepared for the worsed.Remember that for the next one as you said he was a EX

Answer 3

First off he doesn't sound the most mature, not that many of us our. I'd say he wasn't lying just wanted to be truthful and see how you would react. If you didn't react badly he'd be good to continue to fool around.
On the other hand 7 months is a long time to be apart, did you discuss any rules or any mention of a split/time apart from each other?
If hes worth it I'd let it go, and put it in the past if the first 2 years were good.

Answer 4

okay, first of all it was disrespectful and very immature for him to tell you something like that. If he really loved you he would want the best for you. Second, babygirl "THE CREATOR" he gave women something to configure things like this out but we just either ignore it or fail to use it: its called instinct. (You know that little gut feeling) and you need to use that when making ANY decision. Use your first mind. I could go on all day saying that you could have better and that you know how strong you are---no brainers. But if you do see him, dont be rude---just ignore. If he's really that important and really loved you the way he said that he did he would come to you like a MAN and apologize...and that's that. You arent a puppet on a string..dont get played by him--play right along with him. You dont deserve any diss from NO ONE especially not someone that you love. Btw, how on earth can he ask you to be honest if he wont be honest with you??? You need to peep the game gurl, and reverse it on him--seriously. Go into the "I dont care" mode for awhile...dont be weak either. Good luck sis!

Answer 5

He may have had a good time where people thought of him as the "cool guy" to hang around with (for the first time, maybe) and he came back all cocky. He thought he'd try his cocky act with you and found out immediately that you would have none of that behavior.

Further, being in love with you may exacerbate his feelings of insecurity, so he thought that by telling you FIRST that he had sex with someone (when he actually didn't) it would ease the pain of hearing that you did. Doesn't make much sense, I know, but us guys don't make much sense sometimes in general.

I honestly do not think he did anything with anyone. I think he's so into you that his insecurities got to him causing him to act goofy when he got back . . . he put a temporary wall up around him to protect himself from the pain of hearing that anything happened while he was gone.

Answer 6

Hes playing with your head chick, forget him. Do you want to spend the rest of your Life waiting for him, While hes out fxcking other chicks and lying to you about it? or would you rather get into a relationship where the boy really does care about your feelings and wouldnt ever do that. Trust me, iv been there done that. Get out of it. Hell make your life misrable && i know it will be hard and it will hurt, But.. It will hurt worse later on. So it would be better to end it all now for good. You two can stay friends as long he doesnt harass your or anything. Just, do what your heart tells you k babe?? I wish you good luck<3

Answer 7

Even if the break up wasn't your idea, the fact of the matter, he is your EX boyfriend for a good reason.
If the guy broke it off with you, then he failed to see what a great person you are, and doesn't deserve (especially after how he's talking) a second chance with you.
I would keep him a safe distance from you and go out and meet some new guys--and find a guy that will be with you no matter where they go.

Answer 8

Move on!
he's playing with you.
he doesn't play on an equal footing with you.
he wants you to trust him, but how to trust someone who says "I was with someone else" and ho, sorry that's not true, it's just a joke.
there is something wrong. he wants you to be is thing because you know each other for along time.
Don't trust him, and you know what!!
he's not the only man on Earth!!!!!!
you're young , you're a beautiful woman and there is so many men out there.
and you probably will find as we say in France "chaussure à ton pied" (shoe at your foot)
Good luck!

Answer 9

Complicated. But seems he came back and teased you to get a reaction. One to see if you still cared about him. The holiday has changed him and now you no longer see what you originally liked. Probably give him a chance to see if he settles back to how he was or it's probably best to move on...

Answer 10

This guy is playing you, Mind games are not funny weather they are true are not. Tell he straight that you will not stand for this behavior .It's up to you what you believe ask Him why he said it and how would he feel if you had said it. DON'T stand for this. Iv been there and its not on from the person that is suppose to love you.