Should I move back to my home town or move further away to do a fantastic course?

Question

I am 30 and have been living in london for the last few years and have been desperate to move back to my home town up north and have managed to acheive an interesting, if not well-paid job, there. However, at the same time I have also been offered the chance to study a fully funded Masters with a grant to become a health professional ,that lasts two years, just outside London. This is a course that is highly competitive to get in to and I have been turned down for this course several times before. However, I miss my family and they miss me and are excited at the thought I am going back up there. Nobody in my family moves away from their home area so they don't understand. Even though I actually visit them about once a month they still wish I would live closer to them, even though they would never put any pressure on me to do so. My partner is also not very keen on moving back up north but would try it to please me, as he is very nice like that! Please help, what should I do?

Answer 1

I really suggest you do your Masters. You've got a grant which is fantastic fortune and you've been accepted. Now go and do it.

Of course you miss your family. But you do keep in close touch and if you let this chance of the Masters slip away, when will it return? How regretful will you feel? As others have said, obtaining it will make you far more employable and you may then decide to go back home and get a job locally which will also be interesting but hopefully better paid.

I bet you have friends in London who you would also miss, plus you would miss other things that are only easily available there.

In addition, you need to think of your partner. You say you have got a job there which is interesting; how easy would it be for him to pick up his line of work plus a similar income away form London? How would moving back affect your relationship? He may feel stuck however nice he is (and I am sure he is) and then frustrated. Also you then have the two years to work things through with yourself and with your partner to arrive a decison that is well planned.

In the end though, you have to examine yourself and consider whether short term gratification (moving home) is worth more than long term gratification (doing your Masters) and which course will give you, ultimately, the greater rewards.

Answer 2

If the job offer from up north was exactly what you wanted to do with your life (and given that your family is there too) I would say that you wouldn't have been tempted by this course and would've put it in the past but you are unable to do this so I would suggest that you do the course - while you still have the stamina for, and the enthusiasm because this will start dwindling (not everybody but most) as you get older and your priorities change. Then with a health professional qualification, I am sure you will be in need up there, doing what you have tried so hard to get going. You will hopefully have it all, especially if your partner is happy too. 2 years is not long and it is hardly like you live in another country. I am lucky to see my lot once a year!

Answer 3

You have a tough choice--but you will NEVER regret taking the course, while you might regret passing on it. In two years, your home town will still be there, the chance at a course may not.

Anyone in your family that would want you to miss a professional opportunity like that doesn't deserve you making that sacrifice!

Yes you will miss them, but it is your life, not theirs.

Think about 5 years from now, which decision will you wish you had made??

Answer 4

don't give up the offer to go onto the course - it sounds like it is a once in a life time chance, and it's your chance, grab it with both hands.

Your family will have to wait - your future is more important - making something of yourself means you will have to make sacrifices, this sacrifice is small, go on the course. At the end of it you will be in a better position to help your family if ever they need it, plus you will feel better and stronger within yourself. You'll punch the air saying "I did it".. don't give up that chance. Go for it and become a health professional.

Good Luck and Congratulations.

Answer 5

You first of all need to achieve the most important thing presently and that is get into the health profession that you have been keenly applying for and being turned for several times. Remember while you are so busy tying to make it into the course, for a brief moment you will forget that you miss your family and before you realise it, you will have graduated then have a great option on what to do. I am sure that then you will be a very marketable professional.

Answer 6

Don't pass up this fantastic opportunity of a lifetime. because you will never get it again and you will always regret it if you do, always think 'I wish I had done that'. I am sure your family will understand because if they love you they will not wish you to pass up such a fantastic offer. Two years is nothing - it will fly by. If your partner is long term, too, it would not be fair for him to move up north at this time just to please you. He might regret it too. I wish you luck with your Degree (if you do it, and I sincerely hope you will). You will be one better than me as I only have a BA Hons degree!!!!

Answer 7

I think you should do the course - it will open more doors for you in the long run. Can you afford to pass up such a golden opportunity?? Your family will understand, and you can move back anytime. 2 years is nothing in the grand scheme of things

Answer 8

What a dilemma! To be honest I would do the course and see how I felt when it was finished and what your situation is. As a health professional you will be able to get a job anywhere in the country too so your career wouldn't be holding you back.

Good luck!

Answer 9

Do that course or you'll spend your life wondering "what if". Your home town and your family won't budge, they'll still be there in two years time... that unique opportunity though won't.

Answer 10

Do your fantastic course. Your family cannot live your life for you, and you cannot live in their pockets, no matter how much you love them. Your loyalty lies with who you want to spend the rest of your life with, don't throw this opportunity away.