is it normal to be afraid of people? i cant get a job because of it?

Question

i am 19 years old my parents are forcing me to get a job i can't be around people i feel really nervous around people i get scare i don't know why can anyone tell me whats wrong with me i can't go out with my own friends. i have not call or seen any of my friends this summer its not because i don't want to its just because everytime i tried to call them i get scare and i just turn off my phone i think i need help can anyone give some advice on what to do and thak you

thank u all for your support and help

Answer 1

It sounds like Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD) also called Social Phobia and it effects 80% of the US population. It is an irrational fear that to us can be debilitating and effect you in every aspect of life. Basically SAD involves feeling like people are watching and scrutinizing you all the time, your afraid to speak up because you feel people are always judging you and talking about you...we clam up because we don't want to say anything that will 1. Draw attention to ourselves or 2. Embarrass ourselves in public 3. We tend to act completely different in public then we do with our family or when we are just alone... you feel almost fake and fight against anyone viewing you that way when you know deep down that that is not who you are. The best treatment for SAD is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and as painful as this sounds Exposure to the elements that make you so afraid. If the fear is effecting your daily routine and hindering your life you may need medication initially to begin to feel better although I do not recommend staying on meds long term cause you can become dependent on them or worse you take them until they are not effective anymore.... this is why it is very important to seek help in either a group context or individual treatment if you are not ready for groups yet. Check out the link below for more information.

Best wishes and it will take time but it's a battle you must engage everyday to get better. I know I'm still battling it everyday.

Only you know how severe your symptoms are and how it effects your life. Medication is a personal choice that only you can make. I personally have tried medication and it helped for a little while but I could not stand the side effects. Start slowly but I would highly recommend seeking a support group just so you can begin to amass as much information on the disorder as you can. There is a HUGE difference between simple shyness and S.A.D.


http://socialanxiety.factsforhealth.org/
http://www.socialanxiety.com/index.html

Answer 2

Is it normal...not really, at least not to your extent. Are you the only one in the world who gets this way? Not at all. You need to take it upon yourself to slowly get out there[with people u trust]. This is not about getting a job. This is about overcoming your phobia. Baby steps...maybe a movie here and there with friends, then the mall, stuff like that...while u are out, pick up an application when u get the chance.

Answer 3

This is not much of an answer but I feel the need to mention that I, too, am 19, and having trouble trying to get a job and manage my social life for the same reasons.
So at least you're not the only one.

Answer 4

Sounds like depression. It can be normal to go through this but you must get out and do things. Any fear can be beat and the longer you stay in the house and hide the harder it will be to get healthy again. People go through this when the feel life sucks and they just dont want to deal with anybody and isolate themselves. Force yourself to do the things you need to but dont want to, like get a job. Work 40 hours a week and get a good paycheck and buy some sh*t that you like, and get on with your life, its too short to be F****** around.

Answer 5

Sounds like Social Anxiety disorder. Many other people have this disorder and you can be helped with a combination of medication and talk therapy. I urge you to see a professional and not listen to the half-baked nitwits on a website like this.

Answer 6

very shy....not really a problem....im extremely shy to...i dont like to socialize w/ ppl...when my cousins friends are at their house i seclude myself in the attic...(the attic is like another room it has a bed and everything, really nice actually) but yeah, ur a shy person, nothing wrong w/ that, but u should just be comfortable around ppl, i dont know what is going on in ur mind but maybe ur afraid of rejection or critizism...that's why i dont talk to ppl much, but that's not good, i have to change that about me and i think u should too...it may be hard, but just dont care what other ppl think of u, they are no better, if they think little of u, that right there tells a lot about them...=)
dont worry, i havent gotten a job either, kind of for the same reason...im kind of afraid of ppl, its silly but hey....im a loner...yeah...!!!

omg...ppl are dumb...u dont need therapy...and there u have it..."get some nuts and get a job" see what i mean...ppl are horrible...but dont worry about him...like i said...his comment says a lot about how he is...actually the best therapy there is is if u help urself...u'll feel proud of urself by overcoming ur problem urself...this could be considered therapy (What im doing) cool! =)
just stand high, dont give a f u c k about others opinions of u...be happy!!!!!!

omg, u dont need medicine, dont take stupid pills for this please!

by the way im 16, just so u know....=P

Answer 7

I suggest you read "The Places That Scare You" by Pema Chodron

You could start applying the wisdom in this book and see results in a few days...

Stay inside the fear and it vanishes -- it takes a little effort but you'll get immediate results once you know how to stay inside it

Answer 8

"Anthropophobia- Fear of people or society."

Here is a site that is listed on the subject using a unique technique.

Hope this helps.
James

Answer 9

yeah thats not normal at all. see someone right away, and if your parents wont let you ( mine thought therapist were from the devil and wouldnt let my brother see one ) then try everything you can to do it on your own, especially if youre 19 it shouldnt be a problem.

Answer 10

i know what you mean, sometimes i get nervous around people, but the more your around them the more comfortable you get. Just gotta remember no ones going to hurt you.