I was with him for about a year, I broke up with him because it was too much drama, he was a typical football jock and every freakin girl wanted to jump on him, It was too much drama for me with all these girls all over him, plus he was a flirty person. But why can't i get over him its been more than 4 years since we broke up... I still wonder if he thinks about me, maybe because he was my first love but i was like his freakin 5th or something.
2006-08-15 13:27:55 · 33 answers · asked by cremedelacreme 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Maybe because of the drama. Think about it - whatever drama is, it isn't boring, and it may be that you are missing the focus that constantly trying to keep up with your boyfriend's popularity brought to your life.
Maybe also that the act of defending your relationship made it more precious to you. If nothing else, it kept you from taking him for granted.
Maybe slightly because of the ego boost - all those chicks dripping off of him, and he was with you :)
In any case, since you broke up with him, at some level you realized that whatever you were in love with, it wasn't him, and that the madness just wasn't worth it. Believe it or not, there are a LOT of people who make themselves miserable for years because they don't have that kind of clarity.
End of the day - you did the right thing. Embrace it.
2006-08-15 13:42:06 · answer #1 · answered by AmericanDreamer 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-05-07 19:59:16 · answer #2 · answered by Martina 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'm going through exactly the same situation as you,i still think about my ex after two years cus we went out for three years and he was my first.But if your still thinking about him after 4 yrs then am sorry to say this but your love struck. Don't listen to all of them saying your obsessed and all,cuz i dn't think thats the case.To be honest i don't think you'l ever really get over him. I know what am gonna say might sound hard but maybe you should call him up,speak casually,you might find that his a tottally diffrent person from the person you went out with four years ago. he could have changed in many ways,personality,values,morals etc and that would make a whole new person. If you are able to see that he has changed it might help you to move on. Tw xxx
2006-08-15 22:12:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because you still love me? oh wait.... this might not be who i wish it is.... lol.
My thoughts** You obviously cared deeply about the guy regardless of how popular he was with the other girls. If you care so deeply about him, it might be time to give him a call (if you still have his phone number). If your relationship died because of other girls, and not because of any sort of animosity between the two of you, the odds are he doesn't have any bad feelings towards you. I've had a couple relationships that ended simply because my girlfriend and I were at different points in our lives. While I have a rule about not dating ex girlfriends... although... I would make an exception for at least one of them.
My advice... call him if you have his number. If you dont have his number, try to reach him through mutual friends. If you have feelings for him 4 years after you dated, it's worth putting a little effort into tracking him down.
When / if you ever get ahold of him, just tell him that you've been thinking about him, and would like to get to know him again. As time progresses let your intentions be known (whatever they might be.... dating? Friendship?). I'm certain he would respond positively. If he is in a relationship, respect that... give him his space, and just be friend. Who knows you may contact him, and he could have changed...he could be a real jerk, have gained 50 pounds and have bad acne? This might provide closure for you simply by getting ahold of him!
Good Luck... and if it's me you're talking about .... I'll be hearing from you soon!
2006-08-15 14:25:41 · answer #4 · answered by the_thoughtless_ponderer 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The truth is, you never get over your first love. But time does make it better, especially if you can continually remind yourself of the negative reasons that the two of you were not good for each other. Someone told me a long time ago, that people have personality traits that never change. For example if they are selfish, they will always be so. This type of guy is a player and you're only going to get hurt if you go there again. Its natural to think or feel strongly for past loves, so don't think that you're weird.
2006-08-15 13:36:38 · answer #5 · answered by tyler l 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in a similar situation for a while. I did nt get out of the funk until I realized that he had moved on, while I was stagnant. I found out he had family. And the third person in the love triangle had also moved on.
I felt silly being the only person who hadn't.
I know that you are hurting at the moment, but you seriously need to move on. I am certain he has. Stop wondwering about what could have been, what should have been.
Acknowledge whatever pain you are going through and push through it.
2006-08-15 13:55:59 · answer #6 · answered by dionne m 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What! Four years! Oh, man! I'm so sorry, but if you're still thinking about him after four years, maybe you could speak to a psychologist. I'm not saying this rudely at all, I'm serious.
You seem to have major issues with letting go. Plus, your confidence and self-worth might use a boost too.
It's hard to feel the way you do so I hope you're able to eventually move on.
2006-08-15 13:32:59 · answer #7 · answered by CC 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yea exactly he was your first experiance with love we all remember the first time.But you probably are better off without him temptation is hard for a guy to fight off believe me i know.I was a high School quarterback and then Quarterbacked for tennessee-Martin for a yr and im still a virgin.Sounds bad yes but not all guys are pricks sometimes i felt like bitting my lip off or staying busy for a few days just to stay away from the temptation
I know what your thinkin hehe im not ugly check my profile
The morale is Love is special some get it and dont want to let it go or some wait until they dont think they will have to let it go like myself.
2006-08-15 14:49:59 · answer #8 · answered by Brian 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
girl its going to be hard to forget him i may self was married for 27yrs and i still miss my man he too was my first love and the father of my 4 children we have been separated avery long time and every day i hope that he will come back home he to is a big flirt but that first love is something else and the only thing that i find to ease some of that hurt is to find you someone else very soon because the love you have for him will never go away .you knew that it was not going to work so go on and find happiness.
2006-08-15 13:43:39 · answer #9 · answered by Cheryl T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course you will be drooling over him still because he was your first love and I understand you get emotionally attatched to guys really fast. I guess you liked his flirty nature or somethin and you miss it. Just find someone who you know that wont start drama. It's your choice. Stick with the drama or get out of the misery
2006-08-15 13:35:55 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋