I seem to have a special bond with my daughter who is 2 that I just don't have with my son who is 10. It has nothing to do with loving her more, it is just a connection that I seem to have with her. When I was only a few weeks pregnant I was told more than likely I was going to have a miscarriage. I luckely didn't and when I found out I was having a little girl, I was just extatic. She was born with a medical problem, so I have always been very protective over her, in a way that I wasn't with my son. I don't know if it also has to do with the fact that I was almost 8 years older when I had her than when I had my son. Whatever the reason, there just seems to be a bond that she and I share that I dont have with my son. Anyone else have a bond like this with one certain child?
2006-08-15 13:12:58 · 18 answers · asked by LittleMermaid 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I just wanted to point out, cause I think a couple of people didn't read the entire question, that I said it has nothing at all to do with loving her more. I love them both equal. So please don't make false assumptions that I am saying I love her more, cause that would be your words, not mine.
2006-08-15 13:23:59 · update #1
i just wanted to say I'm a mom of two & pregnant with #3. I do deeply love both kids. I am so much more protective of my 1st my son who's 10 then of my daughter whos 8. My son was born premature I had him SINGLE lived ALONE. He and i struggled the 1st few years we toughed it out together. He is mentally delayed in speach classes since age 4 "still in them" he has a special ed teacher. My daughter is GREAT very advanced very very cute and popular. I feel so much more close to my son i think it comes from having a struggle with him fear of him dying from being premature and raising him by myself in the newborn stages. I KNEW he only had me. My daughter had 2 parents was NOT A special needs baby. I adore her but, the bond is diffrent with him.
2006-08-15 14:47:28 · answer #1 · answered by ally'smom 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Like you, my "special" bond is with my youngest son who is now almost 16. I found out I was pregnant while being examined after a car wreck in which the car rolled 3 times and hit a tree. During the delivery, he and I both died twice. My oldest , who is now 18, has always known that I desperately love him and will protect him fiercely, has just always been more independent, while my youngest was considered the miracle baby. Over the past 15 years, our bond has only strengthened.
2006-08-15 20:31:54 · answer #2 · answered by Athena 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have the same situation you have but my son is now 16. He was born premature and had a hard start at life. As for my daughter she will be 22 and her and I don't always see eye to eye and that is because my sister and mother gave more to her than my son. I love them both the same and treat them the same but there is just a big difference between the 2 of them.
2006-08-15 20:20:09 · answer #3 · answered by Board 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it could be that you really wanted a girl. Plus mothers and daughters tend to be close. Although I would try to work on the bond with my son. I have a 2 and 8 and I love my boys like nobodies business.
2006-08-15 20:22:01 · answer #4 · answered by Medical and Business Information 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I worry that that may happen to me too. I love my son to death and I devote most of my time to him. But I'm pregnant and only have a month left and I just don't feel like I'm going to connect with this child as much. I don't even acknowledge being pregnant usually and I do not get the same great feeling when he kicks and moves around. I feel bad because I know I will love him, but I just don't feel connected at all.
2006-08-15 20:40:47 · answer #5 · answered by Chelle's Belle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think time has a funny effect on all relationships. Don't feel guilty. There WILL be a time in your life when you share something with your son that you don't with your daughter. I am like that with both of my parents- there are times in our lives when we connect more than others.
I also have 2 children of my own and can easily see how, though my love for them is EQUAL, it is expressed DIFFERENTLY.
2006-08-15 21:11:58 · answer #6 · answered by l8ybugn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i am the same way with my 2 yr old son...i have a 4 yr old girl and a 7 mth old girl...but foir some reason that little boy can get away with murder with me whereas his older sister i tend to not be so carefree..i don't really understand it myself..and as for the little one..well maybe its just the mother son thing with me...don'tget me wrong i take very good care of them and love is not an issue..i love them all very much..but the boy seems to have a tighter grip on my heart strings
2006-08-15 20:19:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes,I have a special bond with my son who is 7,and my youngest of 4.The others are a girl,age 15,and 2 other boys,ages 11 and 12.I really think it is because he is the 'baby'...my last baby.But of course I adore them all:)
2006-08-15 20:18:47 · answer #8 · answered by MaryBeth 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I learned in psychology, that it is quite a normal thing to have a special bond with one child that you don't have with the others. Kids are people too, and just as you drawn to some people more than others the same rule applies with your kids.
2006-08-15 20:19:52 · answer #9 · answered by sheila c 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope --love both children equally ---even though my daughter is easier --my son makes up in sense of humor. In other words ---- celebrate the differences with each child and realize how unique each child is!!
2006-08-15 20:18:58 · answer #10 · answered by jiffypop88 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋