I NEED HELP BADLY - how to respond to publicly humiliating personal questions?

Question

I am a member of hair club for men (wigs, toupee, etc).

If a new "friend" asks me in front of several others if I am bald, how should I respond?

My basic premises are: this is personal; this is humiliating; this is "low" tactic.

Some options I considered:

1. Accept it eventhough I am hurt, offended, and want to slap the person.

2. Accept it and inform the person that I am hurt and offended and that he/she should put himself/herself in my situation. Ask if he/she would ask that same question publicly if a person has breast implant or penile implant.

3. Tell the person that he/she is inappropriate, uncultivated, improper, vicious, etc (give me some more vocabs). That is attack a little.

4. Tell the person that he/she is "whatever" that is appropriate to that person (fat, stupid, short, ugly, etc). That is fire for fire.

5. Deny it and see how long I can get away with it.

6. Joke about it somehow?

Answer 1

I'd be cool about it. But pull them aside afterward and let them know that you don't appreciate their comments.

Answer 2

4

Answer 3

You should respond with: "Yes, I'm bald". Then you should remove the toupé, and show him/her. If you do this, everybody will know, and nobody will think it's funny.

On the other hand, if you try to hide that you're bald, everyone will find out anyway, and everyone will think it's funny. And you'll be teased for the rest of your life, because they would think it's funny to tease you.

Trust me, it works. Back in college, I had sort of an "accident" at a school trip, where I puked and shitted down an entire toilet after a bit too much alcohol intake. But I was never ridiculed because I was open about, and even tried to tell it to others as a funny story. Had I tried to hide it, well, you all know the result...

Answer 4

We all end up with a foot in our mouth at least once in life. Unless you have reason to believe otherwise, assume that your friend didn't think before asking the question. Don't strike back with a rude comment of your own. The world has enough of that. It's better to set a good example than get revenge.

If you feel comfortable enough with yourself, tell the truth. It's a fact of the world that many men and women lose their hair.

Or laugh it off with something like, "Before I answer, is your next question going to be, 'Do you have a penile implant?'?"

Answer 5

I'm not sure what the correct answer is. You say you are a member of a hair club for men, does that mean you "partake" of their products as well? If not, then the answer would be obvious. It may also be obvious if you are wearing a poorly constructed hairpiece. Not that you asked my opinion, BUT... I think, on a man, it is MUCH sexier to be bald that to sport some unnatural piece of ???? Who knows what it really is. Hair pieces, toupees, etc.. never look natural and they only make the men who wear them look like a fool. I know, or have heard, that men take pride in their hair, therefore losing it is devastating, like losing a part of their manhood, or it may make them feel like less of a man, but trust me when I say this... go au natural! :) As far as what to say, if you purchased the flop on your head, it's yours and you are no longer bald (at the moment you are wearing it) so you can proudly say NO. Of course, this only works when you are wearing it! :)

Answer 6

6.

Being bald is nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed about. Don't make your life miserable by getting hurt and embarrassed every time someone brings it up or asks about it. Try to accept it and just look at the bright sides. And when people say something about it, just try to joke about it somehow. I think that's the best you can do.

Answer 7

I'd look at the person very pointedly and ask, "What are you going to do with that information?" This worked well with me when I was younger. I was always a very "inquisitive" child, and when I'd ask my grandfather something that was absolutely none of my business, he'd respond with what I just told you. This shut me up in a New York minute and made me feel about an inch tall.

Answer 8

Yes, it is a rude question, but humiliating? Isn't it more embarrassing to be a toupee wearer than to show off your natural dome and be proud of it? Just stand up and shout "I'm bald and I'm proud!"

Either that or just counter with a cold stare, but one of these days a bird might rip your toupee off and the gig will be up.

Answer 9

I think that if you are being asked these questions, you need to 1)
go to a place that does better work so it is difficult to tell you are wearing a hair piece; 2) Or, if this is too expensive, shave your head and be proud. Your hair is not your only positive feature- you need to find out what else others love about you.

Answer 10

Some people are incredibly rude, others are just curious, and sometimes it's hard to know which is which.
If you can make a joke of it eg "Are you going to give me a transplant?" or "I'm sworn to secrecy. If I tell you, I'll have to kill you," or something of that sort, you can turn it away. No matter what else they say, just smile, change the subject and refuse to discuss it further.

Answer 11

#6 - Crack a joke. Because once someone knows your weekness, it will go in their back pocket for later. Laugh it off and go along with it. Until it pushes the line. Then tell that person back off and dont be jealous their real hair cant look that good fake!!!

Besides, bald men are sexy!!!!!