Lol you never here someone say this:?

Question

There was this artist, who worked from a studio in his home. He specialized in nudes, and had been working on what he thought would be a masterpiece for several months now. As usual, his model reported, and after exchanging the usual greetings and small talk, she began to undress for the day's work.
He told her not to bother as he felt pretty bad with a cold he had been fighting. He told her that he would pay her for the day, but that she could just go home; he just wanted some hot tea and then, off to bed.
The model said "Oh, please, let me fix it for you. It's the least I can do." He agreed and told her to fix herself a cup too. They were sitting in the living room just exchanging small talk and enjoying their tea, when he heard the front door open and close, then some familiar footsteps.
"Oh my God!" he whispered loudly, "It's my wife, Quick! Take all your clothes off."


Say a good joke and I will give you 10 points!

Answer 1

very good,
here's one:

1st Man: Oh hello, how are you, let me buy you a drink!
2nd Man: Why thank you." he replies. "Where are you from?
1st Man: Oh, I'm from Ireland," he replies.
2nd Man: You don't say. I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland.
1st Man: Of course!

And they both pour back their drinks....


2nd Man: So, where in Ireland are you from?
1st Man: Dublin," comes the reply.
2nd Man: I can't believe it says the first man. I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin!
1st Man: Aye! why not!" And both men continue drinking.
2nd Man: So, like... hmmmm... What school did you go to?
1st Man: St. Mary's, I graduated in '62.
2nd Man: You don't say! This is bloody unbelievable, I went to St. Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!
1st Man: Noooo way???

About that time, in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Oh nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Mally twins are drunk again."

Answer 2

What is it called when a woman has a sex change? Addadictomy.

Man says, 'Doc I think I might have a venereal disease.'
Doc says, Does you penis burn during sex?'
Man says, 'I don't know, I've never tried to light it."

Man calls a doctor: 'Doc you got to come quick
my son just swallowed a rubber."
The doc hangs up the phone and grabs his bag, when the phone rings again.
It's the man = Never mind, I found another one.

Doc asks a woman to undress.
She takes off her shirt, and reveals five boobs.
the Doc says 'How does your bra fit?'
Woman - 'Like a glove'.

Woman tells her psychiatrist - I have a problem,
I want to sleep with every man I meet. Doc, what's that called.
Doc (as he leads her to his bedroom) - Good news.

Answer 3

good- lol
i've got 1

once there was a man driving down the road
he had to use the bathroom REALLY bad #2
he saw a small store ahead and quickly pulled over
he ran to the bathroom, and plopped down on the toilet
and did his business.
While in progress, he saw a sign on the wall that said
there wasn't any toiet paper and you had to use your hands
and below that it said to put your hand in the hole in the wall and it would get cleaned.

so... the guy used his finger and then put his hand in the hole.
on the other side, someone smashed the guys fingers
with a brick.
The guy quickly pulled his hand out of the hole and put them straight to his mouth!

Answer 4

An interesting spin on a common occurrence.

Answer 5

thats a good joke

Answer 6

ok i have greatest joke of all time. there is this man and woman and they are on a roadtrip

Answer 7

a good joke

Answer 8

haha now thats a twist :) ♥

Answer 9

Lol

Answer 10

lol! ..thx