My 8-yr old son gets easily angered and often into fights w/ his classmates.How do I manage to control this?

Question

When his playing with his mates or his siblings small things can get him mad right away and would hit back physically.In most cases it happens when he is being taunted and become frustrated. He's even doing it on his 2-yr old brother. But I should say that the fights I've observed were not that severe as his anger level easily goes down too.
In addition, he's a bit of hyper active and always wants to play & play..He is not showing any interest on his studies.His teacher is telling me that most of the time he's not listening , not writing lessons & not answering his quizzes & assignments. I've noticed his non interest on numbers & letters when he was still a pre-schooler but I just thought that maybe when he'll grow older it will change. I never see a medical pratictioner to determine his case. Thanks.

Answer 1

Im gonna put this plane and simple bust his butt. God said spare the rod spoil the child.

Answer 2

I read some of the previous answers and I think they are valid, but you didn't describe how severe these fights are or what if anything you've done to address it up to this point. Before you begin psychological evaluations, and especially before you consider medications, I think you should go to a therapist, or a behavior specialist and have the child explore his anger and learn some anger management skills. This is the step to take BEFORE you do the other things. If this is not successful, then the professional you have contacted can refer you to the next appropriate service. Good Luck!

Answer 3

I have a daughter with Asperger's Syndrom (which is rare in girls).
When she was four years old she started to see a therapist for anger issues.
As she got older she had great grades in school - no learning issues, but still lots of anger issues (and has been seeing the thereapist off and on for years).
We had been getting bits and pieces of the proper diagnosis over the years (anger issues, sensory overload issues, allergies) but still the fighting with the classmates was a consitant thing.
After talking to her pediatrician, her therapist, and her occupational therapist we were still not getting it.
There was more to it but we did not know what.
We were at the end of our rope, the school was working with us but we were not satisifed with her behavior.
Finally we insisted that through her therapists office she get a full exam.
The results were the result.
By that I mean - she was set up with a PHD who worked with children for a 3 hour test, it turned out to be 3&1/2 hours (for her it was play time with all of the attention focused on her. She thought it was great!).
She was not tested for a specific thing, what ever her issue was (ADHD, Bi-Polar, Asperger's, High functioning Autism, Depression,Dyslexia) would stand out at the end of testing.
As I mentioned earlier - it was Asperger's.
1 out of every 166 kids are on the Autism Spectrum Disorder Scale.
The symbol for Autism is a puzzle piece.
There is a reason for that.
Our daughter was 10 years old before we got all the pieces of her puzzle.
Her pediatrician missed it (she did get the allergy part of it diagnosed, but let's face it they only get 15-20 minutes with each child and they specialize in medicine not mental health).
Her teachers missed it (she got great grades, and when she wasn't mad she was a good little girl).
Her therapist missed it (most licensed therapists are not doctors that is why she needed the PHD to do the testing).
Her occupational therapist missed it (she did however diagnose the part that was her actual job - sensory intergration dysfunction).
Ask your school to have the district to come in and do an evaluation on your child.
At the district level they have people who specialize in this sort of thing.
They have the hours that it takes to evaluate this.
They know what they are looking at.
You are already paying for it (your taxes).
IF he has an issue - the sooner you find out what it is the better.
Life got so much better once we found out.
It was not easy at first, but once you get over the fear it gets better.
We now have coping mechanisms in place.
She understands that it is not that she isn't trying hard enough to control herself, or that she isn't as good as the other kids.
She is just wired differently, and so has different things she needs to do to calm herself down.
Is every day a good day?
No.
But now that we know what we are dealing with every day is a better day.
Knowledge is power.
Get the evaluation done.
Get the knowledge the evaluation will give you,
and get the power that goes with it.

Answer 4

First have him diagnosed to make sure he has no imbalance of any kind--sometimes anemic condition will set off anger, since body is starved of right amout of oxygen and healthy blood cells.

If there is no physical condition, then a combination of counseling and raising his self-confidence are required. It is possible that your child gets angry because he feels helpless about something. Generally fights start after taunting by someone. Unfortunately, children can be very cruel because they have not developed a sense of propriety, so they may be egging on your child for fun---even after realizing they are abusing him.

If this is the source, talk to the parents of the children, and ask your child to "grin and bear it", so these taunters can go look for someone else to harrass.

Get him into a team sports, sometimes this helps open up the child.

Answer 5

my son had some of the same issues he is very tender hearted and kids nowdays are just plain mean, i found my son has a learning disablity that i let go untreated, he needs creative ways to be taught, also he may be adhd i am not big on medicating children so see a child therapist for idea's on how to redirect him.

don't give up, try punishiments that are not like spankings since violence causes violence, don't make school work a punishment or he may hate learning, he may trouble adjusting and be an anxious child who doesn't know how to express himself well

Answer 6

If you don't take him to a doctor now, he will begin to dislike himself, get an image of being a bully, find it hard to make friends, get behind in school work, and be unsuccessful.
Take him to a doctor or have the school do observations and tests to evaluate him...they call it a child study team.

Answer 7

Don't worry. I was the same way when i was young. My mother put me in every sport and extra curricular activity possible which helped me with my aggressiveness and my hyper activity. The other alternative is hyper medicine, but i wouldn't recommend it.

Answer 8

he may need pills to calm himself down for a few years. he'll probly mellow out as a teen. you can try to harness the anger by giving him something really intense to do like take some form of martial arts.

Answer 9

He might have a disorder such as ADD or bipolar disorder; you really should see either a pediatrist or phsychologist. If you don't think it's major enough for that, then just make it clear that violence isn't the solution to ANYTHING.

Answer 10

teah him the hidden art of the ling shuengg su, so then just bincase he was fighting for a reason, he'll know martial arts