I work in a daycare, and I have this parent who comes in unannounced and disrupts the whole class...?

Question

and the thing is that she is only coming in to visit, she has no intention of taking her child with her. When she comes in, the child stops whatever she is doing (even when she is eating) and immediately starts crying. Her mother is very obnoxious and expects us to stop what we are doing to cater to her (the mother, not the child) and doesn't even care that she is interrupting anything. Then after 15 min. she leaves and the child stays upset for 10 minutes after. I just would like a way to stop this from happening. It is extremely ANNOYING!!!!!!!

by the way, we have internet cameras in our classrooms that the parents can watch their children on line! This perticular parent has access to that.

Answer 1

Ok, parents are annoying. In a daycare setting, it's just a fact. I have never in my life wanted to choke someone more than the time I was dishing out ice cream into cones as fast as I could, dealing with 14 kids, all on a sugar-high, and some idiot parent came through the door and said to me, "Y'know, I wish I could do THIS all day, instead of working..."

You're in one of the highest stress jobs there is. And getting paid less than half of what you're worth. I've run multi-million dollar machines before, working on things that would be sold for tens of thousands of dollars, and I've never been shouldered with the responsibility that you have every day, of raising and teaching someone else's kids, keeping them safe from themselves and each other, and still having to deal with idiot parents.

It comes with the territory. The parents are part of the package. Expect it, and make changes to deal with it. The parents CAN come to see their children, and there's no IQ test required before they get that privilege.

I only lasted a year and a half in daycare, before I felt it was time to leave before the kids witnessed me killing one of my coworkers. I took a job driving a forklift, and now I have no stress, and make a little more than double what I was making in daycare. It's not fair to you, and it never will be. You're working a noble job, with nothing more than the respect of those of us who have been there, to keep you going. (Unless you count the joy of seeing children grow and learn)

Do what you can with this child, after a while, this child should get accustomed to the visits. But parents will continue to be parents, and they'll continue to do things you never saw coming.

Good luck, and keep it up. You're doing something good.

Answer 2

I, too, stop by my child's daycare to see how things are going when the workers don't expect me. I do tell my children that I may be by to look at things and they shouldn't expect to leave just because I'm there, though.

Try to work this out with the parent. Most parents should understand your point of view but if you try to tell us we can't show up without an appointment you'll lose us and and our children. The question then is what are you trying to hide?

I also stop by the school unannounced.

PS. Added later,

I should have made it clear I wasn't questioning this person's activities. I meant to say in general, why would a daycare want to restrict parents visiting? It can give the appearance of wanting to hide. Sorry if I gave the wrong impression.
-Mike-

Answer 3

Tell her that she is causing a problem and if she is going to continue to come in and make her child upset when she leaves she needs to take her child home with her because the child is upset when she leaves. If she continues tell the supivisor to keep an eye out for the parent and ask her/him to try stoping her before coming into the class.

Answer 4

The daycare administrator should deal with this and stop this behavior by the parent. If the administrator doesn't, I would just ask the women to please leave with her child or go outside with her because she is disrupting the your normal flow of things. If she refuses to do that then let her know as long as she is there you are not responsible for her child, she is and she can stay as long as she wants to as long as she takes care of her child and stays out of your way. Get obnoxious right back with her.

Answer 5

Our daycare has a policy that if you want to check in you can but the child cannot see you. If you make it a habit or the child sees you you have to take them with you. If you abuse it, your out! If a parent thinks something is a miss at daycare then they should use law enforcement.

School- Sorry we have to have an appointment of official business to visit school. You can go sign in but if they determine there's not a legit reason to be there, you have to leave.

And what parent would wanta school with such an open door policy? If it's monitored I understand, but every visitor to school should be stopped and chaparoned. It's amessed up world and open door in schools is not good!

Answer 6

It's worse than annoying. Borders on emotional abuse, IMO.

Have a chat with your supervisor, but keep your tone respectful. Be sure to impress upon the super your concern for the child and not the way the woman treats you or other staff. She does have the right to visit the child, but I don't understand what her motive would be upsetting the poor wee thing like that.

Answer 7

Well I would think that this women is afraid to leave her child, she might be having some separation anxiety so she feels that she needs to visit to check up on her child. If I were you i would ask her to stop visiting because it's disrupting the class and every time she comes her child thinks she is here to pick 'em up and that is why she cries when she leaves.

Answer 8

I use to run a preschool class as the head teacher our policy was parents could drop in any time they wanted...it provides the parent with some comfort knowing that we not only had this policy but encouraged parents to come in. they are leaving their children with people they really didn't know it is scary with all the bad things that you hear about as a parent your #1 priority is your child you can be dam sure I'd drop in as often as I wanted and if I was told I couldn't I'd have to wonder why and would probably take my child out. let the mother drop in and try to keep in mind how she might be feeling...good luck

Answer 9

im not sure if its the same as schools but she has a right to come in any time to see if childs ok but u need to tell her if she is going to keep coming to not let the child see her. that it upsets her why would a parent want to upset ther child like that anyway. also ask her why she is there 15 mins is a long time good luck

Answer 10

If the daycare does not have a policy stating that the parent cannot come into the room then there is not much you can do about it.

Most daycare centers and schools do not mind parents coming to see their children...it shows the parents care.