Our agreement was that he can have girlfriends over every other weekend when my children are with their dad. He broke up with his girlfriend of about 6 years who he has a baby with. Since February he's had one girlfriend who he was with for about a month and broke up, then he had another girlfriend he was with for about two months. Both have come over on the weekend and slept over. Now he has a new girlfriend of about 2 months and he wants to bring her over as well. I dont feel comfortable with all these different women coming to my home especially within such a short time period and I've told him so. He asked me if he can bring her over and asked him if he could wait until he's known her better. Am I over reacting?
2006-08-15 04:44:50 · 31 answers · asked by Try You 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
He does have a job and he pays $450 a month to help pay his expenses. I can be very judgemental at times by nature and he's only bringing them over when the kids are not home. But I still feel like I don't know these women and I don't have a lot of people coming through my house and it could spell trouble.
2006-08-15 04:54:51 · update #1
Your not overreacting, but you might want to discuss with him that maybe he should consider looking into an apartment or if he doesn't make a sufficient amount to afford this, he should look into ads that are looking for room mates. You do after all have 3 children and he's single, therefore 2 different lifestyles. Have a conversation with him, though he is your brother and you would love to help him out but you don't want any conflicts that will hurt your relationship with him. (Misunderstandings, hurt feelings or confrontation w/a girlfriend) Hey, he doesn't know them all that well and neither do you (risk of getting one of those psycho-stalkers) You definitely don't need that esp with your children living there.You want to respect his privacy as well as yours so it may be better if he seeks another alternative place to see his girlfriends or another place to board altogether. Good luck! I am in the same situation but luckily my brother is planning to move out (good thinking bro!)
2006-08-15 05:17:24 · answer #1 · answered by JC 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally, I don't think you are. However you did agree that he could bring his girlfriends over on certain weekends. He is following your rules. But having strange women over so much would not be good either. So it's really up to you and what your final decision is. It's a Catch 22.
2006-08-15 05:27:53 · answer #2 · answered by Mystic 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO its your house and he should have moved out by now. You make the rules. How much money has he saved? Tell him to be out in 30 days if possible. Thats what I would do unless he is renting the basement. There should be room and board at least $50 a week. and then savings for his own place. Ugh. Your husband can help with this talk.
2006-08-15 04:50:29 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's time for big brother to get out. You are a mother first. You're responsibitliy is to your children first. You have 3, not 4. He needs to go live with mommy or on his own. These children are also his nieces/nephews and he needs to to respect them as children, you as his sister and your home. He's not doing any of these things. Time for a change. The christmas season is coming. Lots of part time/seasonal jobs are coming available. Especially w/ UPS and Fed Ex. Hint, hint, hint.
2006-08-15 04:53:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Is he still upholding the every other weekend rule? If you agreed that he could have girlfriends over you should not be the one to monitor how many girlfriends he has. It's fine to show your concern as a sister, but setting rules on who he can date might be overstepping your boundaries. If it really bothers you that much than you need to either re-establish your rules or ask him to leave.
2006-08-15 04:56:35 · answer #5 · answered by gremlincollie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not at all. That is YOUR home and he should abide by your rules or move out. It sets a very bad example for your children with women parading in and out. Especially if he barely knows them. Make it clear and if he refuses then he can find new living arrangements. Your children are more important.
2006-08-15 04:54:05 · answer #6 · answered by blondee 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No your not. First your brother is being selfish because if he's dating and in relationships it's best if he has his own place and stop disrepecting your home. He's a grown man and he needs his own space so instead of him paying you that money he should find his own apartment you need space for you especially since you have kids he needs to realize that your not alone you have a family to take care of as well .
2006-08-15 05:22:33 · answer #7 · answered by Sexygurl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not unreasonable at all. You should sit him down and talk to him. Let him know you are not uncomfortable with all these women you do not know in your house. Say you dont mind helping him out by letting him stay there but if partners are going to be switched like square dancing then take it to a hotel room.
2006-08-15 05:01:33 · answer #8 · answered by ♠♣♥Rogue♣♥♠ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's 27 for brying out loud. Tell him to start looking for a place of his own. If you're not confortable with all these women in your house tell him. You never know people nowadays. And if he finds one that's comfortable at your house you could end up with her staying there too.
2006-08-15 04:54:12 · answer #9 · answered by windandwater 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Heck no..it is ur house! I wouldn't want all these different girls coming in my house all the time! Tell him to go to a motel or better yet get his own place and let you be! Gish..you have enough to handle with 3 kids you don't need a 4th.
2006-08-15 04:50:52 · answer #10 · answered by LeeLynn 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋