How can i encourage my 4th grader to do his homework!?

Question

He is almost 11 and in 4th grade-he was held back in 2nd grade and is still struggeling with his work, he goes to special education, but he is in a new school and is not in the right class yet, everynight its a fight, because he wants to play nintendo or watch tv, and will not open a book for anyhting! school started thursday, and his teacher told me he had so much homework because he wouldnt do it in class, and when he came home he still wouldnt do it, what can i do? i'm tired of fighting with him to do his work, I know he can do it, how can I encourage him without making him think I am dissapointed in him, I know he wants to impress me, so how can I get him to try? I don't want to be too hard on him because he is adjusting to a new school I threatened to take all the tv's out of the house! would this help?

Answer 1

Just pack up the tv and nintendo and put them away. MAKE sure that he sees you doing this. Tell him if he brings home satisfactory grades, then you will let him watch and play one night a week.

You have to sit him down and work through it with him (but NOT do it for him). He most likely feels overwhelmed, and has a fear of failure. He doesn't want to do it, because he doesn't understand it.

Answer 2

I am a teacher so I do know what to do.
First, of all your son is feeling as if he can't do it and is tired of being frustrated by not knowing what to do. He is getting a low self esteem because he is not placed correctly and feels overwhelmed by all that he has to do.
Are you home when he gets home:
Meet him at the door and tell him that once he does a half hour of homework, he can have a half hour of games or tv. Tell him you will be right there with him to help him out in case it gets hard. Make sure all tvs radios etc. are off.
After the half hour of work, praise him and let him relax. Then make dinner....and do the same. After dinner, half hour of work....then tv and games. If your child has more than an hour worth of homework a night that is way too much. Then you should talk to the teacher and request that the school help also. There are state mandated amounts of time that children can be expected to do homework per grade level.
Once he does this without whining for a week tell him you will rent a new nintendo game or something like that.
If the whole home front thing doesn't work. Pick him up from school.......take him to the library where there are no distractions and do the homework together there.
He needs to have his confidence built and will need you there to help him with his work until he begins to feel good about it.

Answer 3

If the reason he is in special ed is academic or maybe for add/adhd, you should talk with his teacher about perhaps shortening the assignments. If he only had a few of each type of problem, he may be more able to succeed. I assume by you saying he isn't in the right class yet means he isn't receiving his sped services yet. The teacher should be cooperative in trying to help your son succeed.

You also could set up a homework time and sit with him. Choose a time (earlier than later) and agree that you two will work on his homework for a set amount of time before taking a break. Maybe you can work 30 mins and then take a break to watch a 30 min show on tv. Then, if there is still more work to be done, you can continue on for a certain amount of time and then take a reward break. You may need to start very small with the times and work your way toward 30 minutes. Just don't allow the break times to exceed the work time preceding it.

Answer 4

Take out the tv, nintendo, and any other electronic he could be distracted by. Make him carry a homework journal to and from school. In it he should list his daily homework and have his teacher initial it. Once he completes it at home, you initial it. Try sitting down with him and giving him your attention while he does the work. Encourage him, but don't do it for him. Start it first thing when he gets in from school, and keep at it until its finished. No playing, no snack, no friends over until its done. You need to show him how serious homework is. That way he'll not be repeating 4th grade.

Answer 5

Have a snack ready for him as soon as he comes home from school. Talk with him while he eats, maybe have something yourself. Talk about his day, if he has any notices to give you, how much homework he has, stuff like that. After his snack, have him start his homework. Get it out for him, put it in front of him with everything he needs, and lock the door if you need to. Just make sure you're sitting with him. Tell him that once he finishes one or two assignments (depending on how large they are) he can watch half an hour of TV or play Nintendo for a little while. But, you have to make him promise that after his fun, he needs to finish up his homework. Make him know that there will be punishments if he doesn't finish his homework, like no TV or Nintendo after dinner or no dessert. Although make sure it doesn't seem like a threat - threatening kids isn't good - its a punishment, and you will have to follow through with it. He will eventually cooperate.

Answer 6

What about setting up a reward & consequence cans.

2 containers with lids that you cannot see through.
markers
craft sticks
stickers & other craft items to decorated the cans.

Lable one container reward & the other consequence. After decorating them.
On each craft stick write either a reward or a consequence & then put them in the correct container. (Have your son help you.)
A reward could be that he gets to stay up an extra 15 minutes.
A consequence would be that he would not get dessert for that night.

Also you might want to have a family meeting & come up with some house rules. On those rules you can state that no television will be turned on until homework is finished along with the others that you come up with.

In these ways he will learn what is expected of him & that there are consequences to his behavior without you comming out as the bad guy all of the time.

These things has worked for my daughter who is almost 11 & will be in the 5th grade this year.

Answer 7

From my experience one thing that you need to try is to lay the responsibility at his feet. By this I mean explain to him that he is growing up and with that comes decisions that only he can make and with decisions come consequences.
His homework is his responsibility and decide what the consequences will be and stick with them.( Don't make unreasonable consequences... pick something that you can follow through with...like no video games that night, or no video games through the week and then if he does his work all week he can play the games on the weekend or next week after his homework is done)
I also have a son who I had to fight with for several years about homework and I sat down and explained to him that he could make his own choice like an adult, and he responded to the thought of acting grown up. (I also explained that if an adult doesn't do what is expected they don't get a paycheck, for example)
The bottom line is all the hell you go through with him know how ever you decide to do it, will pay off in the end, so stay strong and remember to follow through with whatever you decide to do.

Answer 8

i'm sorry that your daughter's instructor is being so unhelpful. i'd attempt encouraging her utilising her love for socialization. Hook up playdates along with her extra concentrated classmates, associates could have a brilliant impact on infants.i'm a nanny and to motivate my fourth grader to do her homework (which extra often than no longer is carried out as quickly as she comes residing house) we invite her studious buddy over. Her buddy jumps good into her homework which conjures up my little lady to stay with. i'd additionally propose some sort of reward device. you are able to promise an day out or take care of if she improves her skills in college. notwithstanding if the instructor does not checklist returned to you, you are able to ask her and he or she'll maximum possibly be user-friendly. If those tips do no longer help i'd additionally attempt getting a miles better authority of the school in touch. they might probable set your daughter up in an after college tutoring application to strengthen focusing skills or supply her different help to assist her prevail. stable luck. i'm hoping it is effective.

Answer 9

i'm assuming he's ADD or ADHD? my son is the same way... that's how i came to that assumption. it's important to make sure he gets into the right classes at his new school. i would address your concerns RIGHT AWAY and MAKE THE SCHOOL do what is in the best interest of the child. don't let the school tell you that you don't have rights... don't let them push you around. no one knows what is better for your child than you (and maybe a doctor that has assisted you with a diagnosis in the past?) don't give up on doing what is right for your boy!

in the mean time, try making a game out of homework. my son likes to be timed... then i check it for completeness and accuracy and then he gets to pick something he wants, or wants to do that night (go out for ice cream... go rent a movie... talk on the phone to friends... have a friend over for a short time...) come up with things that make work fun... i would recommend that you DO take away all of his t.v. games and use those as your reward system!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! each night when he completes his homework (after you've checked it) let him play for a certain period of time. tell him that he can have it for the entire weekend WITHOUT LIMITATION if you get a good report from his teacher about no missing assignments all week!

besides work being fun, i think my boy likes the personal attention he gets from me while he's doing his homework! i know how frustrating it can be! my son was diagnosed ADHD in the 7th grade... i struggled for YEARS with this child... he slipped through the cracks of the system because his test scores were excellent but he NEVER would turn in homework, EVEN IF WE DID IT TOGETHER! (due to disorganization, an ADHD trait). SO, even if you do homework with your boy each night, there's no guarantee that he will turn it in (that's why i suggested the weekend bonus of non-stop video luxery for you to try with your boy IF the teacher gives an excellent homework report on friday). talk with your son's teacher about this approach... all she needs to do is make one phone call to let you know what your son has missing (assignment wise) on friday... or that he turned in everything. talk to the teacher about the reward system to help the teacher better understand your own attempts in trying to make the child succeed. teachers appreciate active parents! I WISH YOU THE BEST of luck!

Answer 10

ok..make it a rule.. as soon as he walks in the door from school he completes all of his work! After you check to see that it is completed he may watch tv or play the nintendo for an hour! Tell him that it is important for him to do his work at school that he can have more play time at home. Stand firm..if the homework is not done...DO NOT!! let him have his freetime.