2006-08-15 02:41:01 · 37 answers · asked by Pat 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Empathise with them. They don't require sympathy. Realise they are in the first stages of their bereavement and give them understanding.
If they are too overcome it is sufficient for you to stay by their side and let them take comfort from your presence.
Avoid saying, "If there is anything I can do just let me know." "Keep in touch." They are in no state of mind to listen to trite remarks however well meant they may be.
You have to offer genuine support and help. Be positive such as, "Please let me do your shopping, clean your windows" etc.
Judge when the time is right and talk to them about their lost husband, wife, son, daughter or friend.
Let them know their loved one will always be with them as long as they are remembered. People only 'die' when they are forgotten.
Sometime they may need time on their own to come to terms with their loss so don't overstay on your visits.
After a while they will open up and talk more freely. You have to talk about the one they have lost and recall the good times and the sad.
They will appreciate this approach much more than feeling no one ever mentions their loved one's name.
2006-08-15 03:09:22 · answer #1 · answered by CurlyQ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You tell them that you are very sorry for their loss. If it was an early death that this person passed then tell them what a shock it was, and if the person was terminally ill you say that the person (who died) will be at peace now. Although when you are the person to whom someone close has died, there is really nothing anyone can say to make you feel better. But at least you know you still have people who care about you.
2006-08-15 02:49:39 · answer #2 · answered by Natalie E 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IT'S NOT EASY.BUT just be the person you normally are and tell them they will always be in your thoughts (the person that's died as well) it also depends on the age as well, if they were old don't say well they had a good long life as that will go down like a lead balloon. Just be a listener more than a speaker, I found when my dad died that people that listened to what I was saying was far more comforting. Hope ya get on alright
2006-08-15 02:49:05 · answer #3 · answered by Denise W 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are no words but I often find that if i say:
'to live in the hearts of those we have left behind is not to die'.
Just say that you are so sorry for their loss and if they ever need to talk then you are there for them at any time.
They need reassurance and comfort at a time such as that.
When i lost my Dad someone said the above words to me and I found immense comfort in that. Also, when I asked if the pain would ever go away someone said to me that no, the pain never leaves, but it gets easier to bear with time.
2006-08-15 02:48:21 · answer #4 · answered by jobarker_1986 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them you are sorry for their loss and that you are there if they need anything. So many people say nothing because they don't know what to say. You can see this by the fact that you have gotten no answers!! Also call and check up on them and take them somewhere, like to dinner to keep them busy if you are close.
2006-08-15 02:48:26 · answer #5 · answered by Sharon A 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There really is nothing you can say, except to express sympathy and support, and to say that you'll be there if they need you, and to make sure you are.
Everyone grieves in different ways, but the most reassuring thing of all is to know that you can count on someone being there to talk to.
2006-08-15 02:48:31 · answer #6 · answered by Jay R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This simple story, One time there was a father lost his daughter in an accident and because of the pain he always grieve and he never smile anymore, one night in his dream, he saw a group of angels all are holding a candle lit, but one of them has a candle without light and it's his daughter, his daughter said, FATHER DO YOU KNOW WHY MY CANDLE DOESN'T HAVE LIGHT IT'S BECAUSE OF THE LIGHT THAT GOD BROUGHT TO MY CANDLE WAS DISTINGUISH EVERY TIME YOU GRIEVE AND IT'S BECAUSE YOU HAVE NEVER LET GO ON ME!
2006-08-15 04:21:42 · answer #7 · answered by a comedian yet very sensous man. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh gosh... sometimes i been in that type of situation before. i just say ummm. well that someone is in a special place now and he/she is probably looking down on u and guiding ur way of life now as ur gardian angel! or the same thing that *A Good Guy* said
2006-08-15 02:49:23 · answer #8 · answered by •°iiFia1125°• 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell them you are sorry about their lose and you are there if they need you at any time. What ever you do don't avoid them.It is sometimes easier to walk the other way when someone is grieving and you feel lost for words.
2006-08-15 02:52:44 · answer #9 · answered by Dolly Blue 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You just need to be as sympathetic as you can and be a good listener. Probably the worst thing you can say is "I know how you feel" ..because it is personal to each person and you definitely wont!
2006-08-15 02:52:09 · answer #10 · answered by enzuigiriuk 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋