One more time, why do they say hello then goodbye?

Question

Am I trying too hard? or is it that I am so laid back! I am freaking out about being alone? Real advice needed. I know I asked the question but only smart pants answered no one with appreciable tips

Answer 1

First stop trying so hard if you believe that is what you are doing. Try something new that most of us don't ever do in the begining of a possible relationship. Whats that you ask? Be yourself. Don't give any false images of yourself. False images can bring a person to say goodbye. For instance, I like to go out danceing and singing. I am not really a home body kind of person. I like to be on the go. I got invovled with someone and I came across as a homebody person. He liked that about me. He is a homebody kind of guy. I finaly snapped did a 360 and wanted to go out more often. He thought my behavior change was strange and didn't know what to think.

I never intended to do this. I was trying not to be excessive on going out. So I became excessive on staying home. I should of went somewhere in the middle.

Anyhow back to you.
Freaking out to be alone. I think I kinda understand that. On one hand I like to be alone and have my freedoms but as I get older I think I don't want to die alone when that time comes. I also feel that I would like to share experiences with someone as I age.

If you have insecurties of being alone that other person may sense that. I don't like it when a guy needs to be with me because he doesn't want to be alone. I don't want that as a factor in a relationship. I would rather have someone that wants to be with me because they enjoy the time spent together. I want someone who is strong enough to live without me if that situation arises. I know that is probably strange to you. Part of my reasoning is I want to know that person is going to be ok if something terrible was to happen to me. Another reason is I want a person who is secure with themselves. I like a strong personality.

Summing it up.
1. Be yourself

2. Try being alone. (Go out on dates but don't rush into anything.) When you start to embrace being alone as a good thing then it will be time to think about a possible relationship.

3. Don't be with someone out of fear of being alone. You may end up regreting that choice and sometimes even when we are with someone we can still feel alone because we are not truely happy.

I almost forgot you mentioned being laid back. If this is who you are then be just that. You may find that their are other people out there that like that type of personality.

I get stressed out and over react sometimes. ok I over react alot of the times. Anyhow, sometimes it's nice to see the view point of a laid back kind of person. Sometimes it calms me down. Sometimes it makes me mad until a few days later when I realize that he/she was right in her thinking.

Example: Broken window in the house. I was fuming. I was told to chill out, what was done was done and getting angry wasn't going to solve a thing. I hate to admit it but that person was completely right!

Answer 2

There are a number of reasons why people say hello then goodbye. It could be them or it could be you. One never knows unless you ask. But you know what, someone is going to say hello to you and never say goodbye. It will come, you just need to keep the faith. You also have to look at where are you meeting people too that say hello to you...is it at a club, a bar? Chances of finding someone there that will say hello and never say good bye are far and few in between. Look somewhere else. Good luck to you.

Answer 3

Sometimes life is a mystery. I wish I could offer you some answers, but it seems, for some, love is hard to come by.

just keep on searching.

Answer 4

dont try too hard. there is somebody out there for you. first try being friends with women and maybe one of those friends could turn out to be more than a friend.

Answer 5

They liked to be poked in the rear.