how should i deal with nasty neighbors?

Question

At the beginning of july the 12 year old called out a racial slur to my husband. I confronted the mother and she grounded her. that night i was shooting off fireworks and this 12 year old came out and asked if she could ld goes inside and makes up some story and her mom comes out SCREAMING at me, saying how unfair i am I'm like whatever, there isn't no way that I'm going to let this girl use MY fireworks after she made some awful comments to my husband. Well, about 2 weeks ago the 14 year old asked to use my digital camera. The The 17 year old snapped a picture of the 14 year old on the toilet (didn't show anything) the 17 year old posted this pic on the 14 year old's myspace profile so the the 17 year old lies and say I posted the pic So it gets to the mother.I try to reason with her, but it's no use, she feels her 17 year old can do ABSOLUTELY nothing wrong. I leave her letter later during the day asking for an explaination of why she is so angry and if we could work it out .

Last night i was cooking and realized i had no salt because the neighbors had borrowed it, so i send my husband over there to go get it at around 10:30 pm. At around midnight, the 12 year old comes up with a bunch of my things and a 3 page letter, so i read the letter.The mother is making ridiculous claims about how I encourage her 17 year old to smoke pot (WTF? don't they know Muslims don't even drink?) and how I talk about sex toys all day (but seriously the only time that was mentioned was when the 17 year old was mad at the other neighbor and suggested to put a "dildo" on her door) That topic never came from my mouth. Also rambling on about how I force them to wear a niqaab when they are at my house (even though i don't even wear one myself , so where that came from i don't know.) And more...so i write a NICE letter answering all her ridiculous claims. At 7 am the mother is screaming outside of our door (it wakes us up) that The peoplewho live here are pot smoking liars.

Because of my panic disorder i listen to calming nature noises just about all day (it helps a lot) and after waking us up by SCREAMING OUTSIDE OF OUR DOOR at 7 am, has the nerve to leave a letter on my door asking me to turn down my "loud music" because she is sick and trying to rest...lol WTF is wrong with these people?!

tell me about it booboo

This woman will stop at nothing! Today she actually got up the nerve to call my job and tell my supervisor lies. My supervisor told me about it and suggest I contact our local court magistrate, which we did this evening.

They said the moment she called my work, she went too far, and there is now a warrant being processed for her arrest.

I guess she opened up the wrong can of worms.

I mean, if you don't like me, FINE, just leave me alone then!

Answer 1

Oh geez...this totally sucks. I hate to sound negative, but it's a screwy situation. I'd say while working through this, agree to never speak to the kids or let them use anything of yours...because HEY, it's yours to begin with and...because these kids are probably not going to straighten up their act. Also, try to consult either a cop or lawyer(difference is, that lawyers cost money unless you're on great terms with the lawyer) about the situation. Yes, it looks suspicious that there's a picture of the 14 year old on the toilet and it's posted online...but unless you're a cracker (criminal hacker)...why would YOU waste your time getting onto the profile and posting that picture...I assume that you've deleted the picture which may or may not be good. Like I said earlier, I'd consult a lawyer or police officer on what you can do.

While talking with your neighbor, I suggest you remain calm...no matter how ugly it gets...that doesn't mean you have to give in to your neighbor's demands or cower under her glare, it means not to lose your temper. Stand up like the adult you are and tell her how you feel, and listen to her completely when she tells you her side of the story. Come to terms with the fact that this person may not believe that the children are demon spawn, but she will probably take her own childhood into consideration (how she may have messed up). No matter how much of an angel she was, or is, she's had to have screwed up sometime in her life, and so have you.

If you think it will get really REALLY ugly, I'd bring in an officer (and you may want to think about asking her permission to do this) to mediate your conversation and make sure everything goes smoothly. Remember, stay calm and be reasonable...wait until you get home to bang your drum or punch the crap out of your pillows.

OH...didn't see the other posts you'd written...here we go:

Definitely bring the cops in on this one because...let's see, there's a public disturbance (noise ordinance being broken AND it's at 7 am) and drug use in a home with children...

Who cares if you're Muslim or not...their claims are crap! That might be construed as defamation if they've told others what you've heard them saying. Sex toys? These kids need better parents and guidance and manners for that matter. SO....call the cops. Give them documentation if you can. Put a videocamera in your house and record them (as stealthily as possible) when they're making all that racket. Keep a tape recorder in your pocket when you're talking to any of that family...again, use tactful stealth, and...be VERY careful with these people...

You don't have to bring the cops to your house or give them your name when you call in the disturbance....let them know that your neighbors have been extremely rude to you in the past and you don't want any future problems that would stem from a disturbance call or anything like that.

Umm....grr...can't think about much more than that...

Answer 2

I'm feeling anxious just reading what you wrote. This is way too crazy. What I would do is cut off my relationship with them. I know it is important to get along but these people do not sound ok. If you have correctly related all events, I would consider moving. It would be hard and expensive but this could get more ugly. Don't write any notes, as they could be used against you later. Do document everything that has happened and if anyone else has seen their behavior, have them write out what they have seen. You may end up with a police situation here. This has all the earmarks of a blow up. Take care.

Answer 3

heres the deal i would even mess with those kids anymore. i might leave a note saying to please dont let her children come over as there has been nothing but problems since but i would just tell them to politly leave the yard and have fun elsewhere. and personaly i woul dnever let a 17 yr old neighbor borrow a electronic device not sure but in my head its just asking for trouble

Answer 4

in tis case being nice is not d answer - right ? so just b urself . n no more lending or borrowing . ur neighbors r one hell of anti - islam people n now with so much anti - sentiments against muslims thro'out d world i am sure u n others muslims r taking alot of flaks . good luck n may allah b wit u always .

Answer 5

um that is a lot of drama for none of this to be remotely your fault. i noticed you asked another question in regards to a whether or not you can test positive if your spouse smoking pot. interesting.
and i happen to know some muslims who smoke pot.

word of advice, do yourself a favor and DO NOT do these neighbors any favors, get in contact with them, or have contact with the children. looks like a liability to me.

Answer 6

if you absolutely find that you can not make peace with the family,and have exhausted all means of mending fences, put a "move away" spell on them! I had a similar problem with neighbors, different circumstances, and it worked great for me! Good luck!

Answer 7

Leave them alone and try to cut off contact. My neighbors (they have moved) used to do the same exact kinds of things, once I ignored them, they realized I didn't care or put up with their stuff, and stopped.

Answer 8

if i was you i would just start ignoring those neighbors if they want to borrow something tell them their mom can come over and ask you for it don't give any thing to the kids not even a look in their direction good luck it will pass

Answer 9

Well ur neighbours are ridiculous, they are just trying to irritate u by all means, i would recommend you to move out from that place or else , u can just try ignoring them, and stop all kind of communication with them.
i hope this helps,
good luck.

Answer 10

I'm not sure about all this ... First, we are only hearing one side of the story - and it takes two to tango.

Based on the info provided, I think I would just sever all communication with them and ignore them.