I have been getting alot of pressure from my husband to have anal sex .We tried it last yr and it hurt and bled.And he didnt even get his penis in .He bought some asperin drops to try again.But I havent tried it again .Kind a turned off to it after that happened but would still like to .Any advice?yes we used lube lots!
2006-08-14 16:48:09 · 13 answers · asked by jessy 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If you're willing to try again...LOTS of foreplay. Let him play with you, use lube, maybe even have a few drinks so you're relaxed a bit. Once you're ready, make sure he enters very slowly, and goes in and out slowly. Let him know how you're doing. If you're ok, just keep going, if not stop. If you're not ready to do this again, then don't, if you're not comfortable with it. You can't be tense at all or else it will hurt really bad. Don't let your husband pressure you all the time about this. "No" means "no" and that's it. Tell him to quite asking you. If he loves you, he will understand and quit asking you about it.
2006-08-14 17:09:45 · answer #1 · answered by Jenna 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Uh..NO! If you bled, and it hurt... take that as a sign that you shouldn't. Your husband should care about your feelings, not his satisfaction. You can't have anal sex if you're not 100% willing for it. You'll be too tense, and cause serious problems. If you're still up for trying, have a few glasses of wine to loosen you up. Lay flat on your stomach so that all your muscles are relaxed and not tensed up. Have him give you a nice rubdown for some 15 minutes to release any tension. And yes, lube it up. You can try having him start with something a bit smaller like a finger to work you into the mood and get accustomed to the feeling.
If after all this, it's still painful, I'd say it's not for you. If he still pressures you about it... I would suggest he take it in the *** first (and please use a dildo the same size as him)... and see how he feels about it. That sometimes changes their perspective.
Please also be aware that if done improperly, you could cause permanent damage that you'll have to deal with the rest of your life. My mother is an ER nurse... and she's seen some horrific things come through the ER with regard to anal sex...
With that said... Good Luck!
2006-08-14 16:59:58 · answer #2 · answered by VixenMom 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I would say for you to try again if you want to. I host adult toy parties that sell anal toys in all sizes so you could start out small and work your way up. IF you do try again be sure to use lots of lube, there are special ones for this kind of thing that are thicker and have numbing agents for you. Have your husband go slow, not just kamakazie. You might get some good info from that sue johansen show on Oxygen, she has a website talksexwithsue.com . Hope it helps.
2006-08-14 17:01:53 · answer #3 · answered by Jennifer Q 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Vodka? Last time I did it I was very drunk and I had no problems. The guy was kind of skinny, though. You also have to be in the mood. Don't just jump right in and bend over. Have sex the way you like it for a while and you will loosen up. If you are thinking about being scared the whole time you will be tense and it will be painful.
2006-08-14 17:23:08 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well,
Recently I had anal sex for the first time. It really hurt right when my man started entering me. I told him to go really slowly after a while ( once he was half way in ) he went faster. Once he was in it didn't hurt anymore. When we did it the second time it already hurt me less and the third time hurt even less. I mean it probably depends on every ones body. Anyways you should try it again, if you want to. If you don't feel comfortable than don't do it.All though it might be easier.
2006-08-14 16:58:00 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You control all of what happens in your bedroom. The rule to always have, no matter who your relationship is with is: No always wins. What that means is that if someone wants to explore areas sexually that the other person isn't comfortable with, when the person says NO, the other person has to always abide by it. Create that rule in your house. Beware though, some guys, like myself, think it's a duty for us to continue to ask, beg or plead, at least 4 times a year. Good Luck
2006-08-14 16:56:07 · answer #6 · answered by marks3kids 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
your hubby must be well hung! if you say you used plenty lube and still had some pressure.
you will get hurt if you dont relax, you have to trust him, and want it...and even then it will hurt a little. Tell him to talk you thru it gently. of course take a few drinks before :)
but do not do it, unlesss you ready and want to...
2006-08-14 17:14:22 · answer #7 · answered by Stacy J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had the same thing happen when my and my friend started having anal sex. I not longer have the blood afterward though. Go to the doctor if your are unsure its the best answer. your doctor will help you out.
2016-03-27 02:08:17 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you take the same advice you gave others. Suck it up and just do it.. after all he is his husband and he could be asking you to do something worse. Does that seem right to you? It shouldn't....Marriage is a compromise. If you don't want him to stick it up your bum you don't have to.
2006-08-15 16:56:30 · answer #9 · answered by lily 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If something hurts you it doesn't matter what he wants. What kind of husband would do something to his wife that causes her pain?
2006-08-14 16:52:34 · answer #10 · answered by daljack -a girl 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋