Anyone else think that weddings have become disgustingly selfish events?

Question

How many hungry people could eat for the money that might be spent on one day? How many nice brides become the epitome of ugly when they spout garbage like "It is the bride's RIGHT to pick the colors!" or "Is it tacky to ask for money only at my shower?" How many women believe that by virtue of "dreaming of this day since they were little girls" they are entitled to pout and stomp and throw fits when the cake leans to the left a little bit? Worse yet, how many people have said "their special day" was "completely ruined" by their drunk priest, inept photographer, stupid cousin, etc? Is this the height of unmitigated gall to have a whole day dedicated to you and to allow one thing to ruin it? If you and your fiancee are coming to blows over invitations, are you scared that it might be a bad omen?
I'm not bashing all weddings, if you can afford it or have modest aspirations, good. I do have a problem with finanacing a party that you will pay off for a long time to come.
Thoughts?

I'm sure everyone's wondering -
I am happily married, we went to the JP and Golden Corral afterward. Been with the same guy for 12 years, married five years ago, one wedding.
My post probably does sound like sour grapes, but, alas, I am too practical for my own good. My dad was going to pay for a wedding on Cape Cod for me, but I couldn't bear for him to spend that much money on a party. I'd rather he spend it on himself, or someone needy, or his grandson.

Answer 1

I agree with you 100% and then some. It is a sickening display of the bourgoisie (sp?) and their disposable morals. My wedding was humble and quiet, yet a certain someone brought 15 uninvited guests with her who devoured every last bit of food and drink and then laughed when we asked them to chip in a few bucks and left. Someone else brought a pit bull, fed it booze, and let it run amok, scaring half the guests away. Some other chick gave my new husband a lap dance for his wedding present. She did it herself in front of all the guests while I stood by in all my then-pregnant glory.

One of these people got married a few years later. She does not work. Her husband does not work. They have not worked for years. They are perfectly capable of working. The least expensive item on her bridal registry was a silk napkin for 125 dollars. Apiece. The next item up was a casserole dish for 375 dollars. The most expensive item was a dining room set for the bargain price of 16 grand. Pretty high aspirations for someone who still lives in her parents' house. We sent her a wooden salad bowl not on the registry. She sent it back.

Weddings suck. Honeymoons suck. Take that fifty grand or whatever the hell you're planning on spending and donate it to a foodbank or a homeless shelter or cancer research or a frigging community centre. After all, a wedding is just a ceremony - it's the marriage afterwards that really counts.

Answer 2

2 years in the past i could have mentioned Aries and Leo...yet now, none, i've got met an excellent sort of Aries those which at the instant are not in all probability selfish. i've got seen that for the time of Cancers, they may well be selfish and close minded at situations, that is going for Scorpios in a diverse way yet i does no longer say they're Disgustingly selfish, i think of that's pushing it somewhat too lots. I even have not at all met a demonstration this is Disgustingly selfish, in line with possibility reason you reside in manhattan, human beings are diverse there a technique or the different?...in line with possibility reason most of the Arians i met are the two introverts and/or mature sufficient to no longer coach their unfavourable side. i presumed you like Cancers? y call them selfish?

Answer 3

Weddings should be about celebrating love and commitment... sometimes people equate love with money. :(

Think about how Christmas or Valentine's Day has become corrupted for many people.

I don't think weddings have become selfish events... it really depends on the bride and groom. If brides react the way you mention, then I would say it is the brides who are spoiled and selfish. A wedding puts a lot of pressure on the bride and groom, but acting that way is unexcusable, no matter how special the day is.

And yes, I find it disappointing how popular culture emphasized extravagance and opulence for weddings, rather than commitment and humility.

Answer 4

"BECOMING disgustingly selfish events?!" They've been so disgustingly selfish and ugly for so many decades that it's horrendous. I remember my mother's gold and ornately framed picture of her in her big white wedding gown hanging in the most prominent place in our house, over the sofa in the living room, for so many years that I can't stand the looks of wedding pictures or brides who "gussie up" so much in such an horrendously egotistical way. Hell, if the newly weds had half the money some brides spend on themselves in THEIR weddings, the couple could start out in a much better position economically and prepare for their upcoming family and household responsibilities. God forbid that they'd be that self-less and giving and mature. I could go on for decades about this subject, none of it being pleasant to hear, but you can believe when I tell you that there is absolutely NOT ONE PICTURE AT ALL of my mother in my house. My dad? Yes. Plenty of pictures. But her. Not a chance. God Bless you.

Answer 5

Totally agree. Weddings have basically turned into ridiculously overstuffed packages of narcissism, vanity and self-importance that overshadows the original importance and dignity of marriage altogether.

When you save up $45,000 dollars to spend on a ceremony that last just one day, you have basically blown a down payment on a house, or the purchase of a brand new luxury car--just so that you and your "closest friends and family" can party and get drunk. And to top it all off, you don't even remember who came or who said what.

Marriages are supposed to be dignified and happy occasions that signal the start of a new family in society. But now they have turned into what most marriages are today--a showy display of a temporary event.

Answer 6

My thoughts are just that people put too much thought into the wedding, and not the marriage. The wedding is just a few hours, and a marriage last a lot longer. If people spent 1% of the time they do on their wedding, on their marriage, we'd probably have less divorces.

Answer 7

Do I detect somebody scorned? My best friend and her husband got married all alone on a hilltop in Scottland. And it must have been beautifully, because if she talks about it you can see the love and amazement in her eyes. It is ultimately between two people - and not about the people that you invite. You can have a beautiful day without spending an arm and a leg.

Answer 8

ohmigod, yes!

I do like the party-thing part, but the "uber-ducats" dished out are obscene.

But everyone should be able to have one big bash like that (I've been married twice and never really had a wedding--I feel a little deprived.)

What is really obscene though, is the "celebrity weddings"--especially when they spend millions every couple of years as they go off and marry a new ms/mr "right".

Answer 9

i used to work banquets and yeah totally out of control. im a justice of the peace man all the way. screw giving enough money to put a down payment on a house so that you can party with some people and wear clothes only once.

Answer 10

i agree with you - weddings are very selfish nowadays - i was listenin to the radio the other day and this shrew of a woman was talkin about how she wanted one of her supposed good friends out of the wedding because she had gained weight and the bride didnt want her to ruin the pictures lol - i was appauled