i am on medicaid, a lot have told me that they will deal with it but others have said they wont. i know i have doctor confidentialty. but n way, i am 16 hes is 25 and we r staying together but i need help on how to keep him out of jail so my happy family can stay together. i want to be able to put him on the birth certificate and would love for him to be able to go to the appointments. i just really need some advice and if any of you have been in this situation plz let me know how u dealt w/ it and how everything turned out.
2006-08-14 11:51:12 · 40 answers · asked by harliquinn_raver_x 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
my parents are fine with it. they r not goign to press charges, i am just worried about the state, maybe taking it into their own hands you know? i live in missouri and i dont know the law that well. i know all of you are saying omg, a pedofile, but you know what? we are in love and couldnt be happier and more excited about our child together. i just want to keep my happy family together. i know that 16 is young and though we didn't plan on this, we are both ready and willing to do anything for this child. i ave a full time job and so does he. We are every bit capable to do this. but how do i keep him out of jail? (for the statuatory rape?)
2006-08-14 14:04:05 · update #1
NOT GOOD!!!!
N U SAY UR PARENTS R COOL WITH THIS!?! wow!
I'M GONNA TELL YA LIKE UR MOMMA SHOULDA !!!!
UR PROTECTING HIM WHEN HE DIDN'T PROTECT U NOR HIMSELF FORM THIS SITUATION!
UR PROTECTING HIM WHEN U DIDN'T EVEN PROTECT UR SELF FROM THIS SITUATION!
BABYGURL HOW CAN U TEACH UR CHILD 2 RESPECT HIS OR HER SELF WHEN U HAVE NOT YET LEARNED SELF RESPECT? UR A PRINCESS, AND U SHOULD BE PROTECTED AS WELL AS RESPECTED - BY OTHERS BUT MOST OF ALL, BY SELF. HE WAS THE ADULT IN THIS SITUATION AND HE TOOK ADVANTAGE THAT! THAT IS NOT UR FAULT!
HE WOULD'T HAVE RISK UR LIFE NOR HIS OWN IF HE WAS A MAN. REAL MEN WOULD NOT HAVE SEX WITH A CHILD N YOU R STILL A CHILD.
U (NOT HIM) JUST GOT THE LIFE SENTENCE - N U DON'T EVEN REALIZE IT!!!!!
My Advice: IF UR STILL IN SCHOOL, STAY THERE! IF UR NOT, PLEASE GO BACK ASAP! EDUCATION IS THE ANSWER 4 U. U GOT A LOT OF LEARNING 2 DO-SO THAT U WILL BE BETTER EQUIPT 4 MOMMYHOOD. U CAN'T BUILD A STRONG FUTURE ON A F U CKED UP FOUNDATION! U N UR BABY CAN MAKE IT IF U GET FOCUSED ON THE RIGHT THINGS. AND PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE NEVER PROTECT SOMEONE THAT HAS VIOLATED U! THAT IS WHAT HAS HAPPENED AND HE SHOULD BE PUNISHED!
U WOULD NOT WANT A GROWN PERSON VIOLATING UR CHILD. THINK ABOUT IT!!! SOON ENOUGH UR GONNA BE A MOM OF A 16 YR OLD (WHEN UR STILL A YOUNG 32 YEAR OLD) N AZ U CAN C, JUST WITH THIS ... IT AIN'T EAZY RAISING CHILDREN!
DAG! This is really sad, U R IN MY PRAYERS! MAY GOD BLESS N KEEP U!
PS: HAD 2 GIVE IT TO U STRAIGHT BOO, IT'S ALL OUTTA LOVE!!! ;-)
2006-08-21 21:04:38 · answer #1 · answered by Di 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I cant judge because I had my son when I was 16 (got preg at 15), his father who passed when I was 5 mos. into the pregnancy, was 22 at the time.....he was never in jail but I feel that if I was put in your situation back then, I wouldnt feel that it was MY responsibility to keep him out of jail. (I know your probably talking about the age thing but if your parents were good ones, they wouldnt charge him with anything because they'd want him to be around for their grandchild) Anyway if thats not what u meant, doing the right thing is a decision HE needs to make himself and the fact of having a child on the way should be enough motivation for him to do so! So you butt out I know you care and want to keep a happy family but if he has a good head on his shoulders, everything will be ok. Now, if he chooses to go commit crimes and stuff then YOU or your child does not need him because obviously, he dont care enough to be around for you guys if he goes and does something that could mean he wont get to be around you guys when he wants to. You get what I'm saying? Well I hope you do and remember although this is off the topic, dont let ANYBODY bring you down about being a teen mom because **** happens and now days, teen moms are turning out to be the better ones! (well in some cases lol)....good luck :)
2006-08-14 12:03:51 · answer #2 · answered by Fearfully & wonderfully made 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have never been in this situation before, you need to know that him having sex with you is against the law. You are under age. Even if you wanted to have sex with him it's still statutory rape. You should have never slept with him. I'm not here to point the finger, think about what you're parents are going to say or do since you're a minor it's up to your parents to press charges and they most likely will. Think about whats best for the baby. If he does go to jail then you're baby will grow up without a father. By you becoming pregnant at 16 you just became a statistic. I hope everything works out in your favor.
2006-08-14 11:57:00 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
OK FIRST OFF, I SEE A LOT OF PEOPLE GIVING YOU BAD ADVICE,NOW TRUE ENOUGH 25 YR OLD MAN HAD NO BUSINESS WITH YOU BUT THAT IS WATER UNDER THE BRIDGE NOW,NO ONE CAN PREDICT WHAT THE LAW WILL DO IT CHANGES ALL THE TIME, IF HE LOVES YOU THIS 25 YR OLD MAN HE WILL MAKE PROVISION'S FOR YOU IN CASE HE DOES HAVE TO DO TIME, HE IS GROWN HE KNOW HE WAS WRONG SO AS YOUR MAN HE SHOULD OWN UP TO IT AND FACE THE CONSEQUENCE'S, HE NEEDS TO SHOW YOU KNOW MATTER WHAT HE IS RESPONSIBLE AND WILLING TO HAVE A FAMILY IN THE FREE AND CLEAR AND NOT ON THE RUN OR ALWAYS LOOKING OVER YOUR SHOULDER.YOU AND HE MADE THIS BED TOGETHER NOW LIE IN IT TOGETHER YOU EACH HAVE A JOB TO DO IF YOU REALLY WANT TO BE THIS LOVING FAMILY.HE NEEDS TO OWN UP AND TAKE WHAT EVER COMES HIS WAY LIKE A MAN, AND ALSO MAKE SURE YOU AND THE BABY WILL BE PROVIDE FOR WHILE HE IS AWAY, AND YOU NEED TO KEEP YOUR APPT. AND BE PATIENT AND CALM SO THE BABY GETS HERE HEALTHY AND STRONG.AND AS FAR AS THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE HE CAN ALWAYS SIGN IT LATER, I AM SURE THERE IS A WAY, IT MAY COST THOUGH.ALL IN ALL YOU ARE IN A GROWN UP SITUATION YOU BOTH NEED TO ACT LIKE GROWN UPS NOW CAUSE THERE IS MORE AT STAKE HERE NOW THAN JUST THE TO OF YOU GETTING CAUGHT TOGETHER HAVING SEX. I AM SORRY THAT YOU HAVE TO GROW UP SO SOON BUT WHEN YOU HAVE A NEW LIFE ON THE INSIDE OF YOU, YOU NEED TO CHANGE THE LIFE ON THE OUTSIDE OF YOU.
2006-08-22 11:39:57 · answer #4 · answered by cocoa lilly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
come on!!!!! he is 25 and yore 16 I don't care how mature u think u are ur not!!!!!He needs to be in jail, cause if u have a girl hes going to feel the same way if he realy care. if he was a mature amn and that this was really cool.... then y do cops go on line just to catch bad guys who rape these 13 and even 16 years old babys, y do ppl put thses 16 old girl on AMBER ALERT!!!!!!! this angers me for i have a girl who will be 16 in another year and if i see a 22 year old man try to talk to her I WILL CUT HIS DI*Ck OFF!!!!!!!!! I would make my husband/boyfriend kick his a**. I would get help for u......... seeknglove from men a the age of 16 it has to go deeper than this.... ...........baby my heart go out to u and I will pray for u, u just dont understand but when ur baby become 16 whether its a girl/boy u will see what I mean. See hes a man (suppose to be one rather, but ask any) and you like it or not are a young girl! a man this age should not be looking at u in such the way he do! he could not find a woman to put up with his childish ways so he preyed on u watch you start to take care of him with ur foodstamps and welfare checks. all i can do is pray that god come into ur life n save and help u. hes stealing ur youth.....hes 9 years older than u , hell when he was 7 u were not even n ur daddys nut sack yet. u had no brain and no back bone dont let this happen to youre baby. may god bless ur home. to answer ur question u better not take him to places like that ppl are noisy especially if ur a white little girl. better say hes ur brother plus he cant sign the birt certificate , so he is forcing ur baby to be a bastard, whates next TRAILER LIFE YELLING AND BARE FEET. sad
2006-08-21 17:54:07 · answer #5 · answered by 1plum 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if your parents are so fine with this....then why aren't they approving you getting married. Marriage is legal in Missouri...and at 16 I don't even think you need parental consent. If you love this man of 25 so much...why isn't this man of 25 marrying you and giving you and the baby financial security...and the commitment that you and the baby deserve.
What are you so afraid of...if no one is pressing charges...then what is the problem other than imaginary problems!!
2006-08-22 10:46:24 · answer #6 · answered by aunt_beeaa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is statutory rape no matter how you look at it a 25 yr old man has no business with a child-yes you are still a child and he robbed you of your chance to grow up. The only way out of this is for your parents to consent to marriage unlikely or keep his name off the records all together or social services will have him arrested.
2006-08-14 12:01:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
he wont go to jail just make up a bday that is in you age difference . or just put hI'm on the certificate its up to your parent s to press charges. oh by the way i hope you know what you are doing. you have to remember he is a lot older than you so in all reality you are still a child. and him being an grown adult should of put on a condemn on to protect your youth. sometimes in life you dig a little deep to find out whats really going on. im my experience with an olderr man was that everything was cool at the time but as i now look at it now everything he did was to keep me under his microscope because i was so naive that no woman his age was going to let him act like that with them so he had to go out get a young girl who was looking for someone to love her.
2006-08-20 08:11:42 · answer #8 · answered by super mom 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get married now! My mother was 16 when she got pregnant and my father was 19. They were very devoted to each other and raised 3 kids beautifully, because they always put family first. They were married 57 years! Everyone said it wouldn't last, but with the support from both families, honesty and respect, they proved everyone wrong. You and do that too!
2006-08-22 11:17:47 · answer #9 · answered by BARBARA S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the state cant pick up charges unless you parents file formal charges but they want him to pay for this baby and i would get married if your parents let you or don't do anything then in which case if he does not pay to help you say after 8 months and he is not the person he promised to be then you can still file charges either way if he is in jail he cant work to pay you i would get permission from parents and get married .good luck your so young i wish you the best and hope you'll be a good mother.
2006-08-14 12:02:27 · answer #10 · answered by nicole l 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋