A man or woman should wait before they start dating, after they have gotten a divorce? One month? Six months? A year? It interests me, cause I have one friend that has been divorced for 6 months, and claims he isn't ready to date. He's 43 and has been married for a while. Then I have another friend, she's 24, and she has been divorced not even a month, and she's ready to start dating. She was in a worse marriage than he was. Her ex-husband use to beat her up and cheat on him.My male friend's "bad" marriage lasted a lot longer than her's. What are your thoughts?
2006-08-14 11:40:58 · 12 answers · asked by Fuzzy 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Actaully, luvinmjc, It's just the opposite. The 24 yr old is still in love with her ex husband, and the 43 yr doesn't miss his ex wife one bit. I know that sounds odd, but it's true.
2006-08-14 11:51:46 · update #1
The timing is up to the individual. Your 43 year old friend just came out of a long term relationship. He probably has fears of getting into another relationship and the whole dating thing can be scary after being married for several years, especially at 43. Your 24 year old friend was ready for that marriage to end long before it did. If he beat her up you can bet she bound herself to the house most of the time. When she got out of her hell hole she was ready to do some partying. Good for her!!!!!
2006-08-14 11:58:35 · answer #1 · answered by blustang04 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
There arn't rules on this, people have opinions on it, but there is NO general rule. Some people date during the seperation, before the divorice is final.
Each person is different. Some lose trust and never date again. Some are positive and ready to trust again.
There is a great deal of personal hurt and emotional damage when a person gets divorced. Some can work through that easier and others .
So, the best answer for this question is that there is no answer.
2006-08-14 18:54:03 · answer #2 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Relationships are like fashion.
Some people can be comfortable in a certain style forever and never feel the need to change. But there may come a day when they feel they are ready for a change.
Others jump into the next fashion that comes out right away feeling it will make a difference in who they are. But then one day they realize they didn't get to know the person inside first, which is what was really important.
2006-08-14 19:06:08 · answer #3 · answered by sweetcitywoman2002 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it might have something to do with the quality of the previous marriage the person was in, and whose idea it was to get the divorce. If I had been in a bad marriage, I wouldn't sit around and mourn it. I would get right back out in the field right away. If you were the one who was divorced, and you were happy in the marriage, it would be much more difficult to try to start over again. I think you are doing yourself a disservice by waiting a certain period of time after a divorce, before you begin dating again. Mr. or Mrs. Right could be right in front of you, and if you don't act when the chance is there, then you might lose a terrific future spouse needlessly.
2006-08-14 18:52:08 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It depends upon the individual. Some have just "had it" during the relationship and detach then mentally, so when the divorce is final, they are pretty much ready to move ahead. Some are blindsided by the whole ordeal, and take a lot longer to grieve, then heal. Some are so in love and distraught by the whole process, they just take a long time...
2006-08-14 18:48:46 · answer #5 · answered by daj11551 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well obviously the 24 year old could not wait to get divorced and she probally fell out of love with him anyway. As far as the 43 year old, he probally does not want to jump on a relationship right away, he probally still has feelings for his x wife and he wants to make sure he is over her until he moves on. Which is only the right thing to do!!!!
2006-08-14 18:46:56 · answer #6 · answered by luvinmjc 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i say leave it up to them when they are ready they will find someone.
and think about what you said one still love her ex husband and the other hates his ex wife. what relation ship do you think they could find feeling this way. they can drive a good person a way. when they meet some one they would have to forget about loving your ex husband and hating your ex wife. they will never be happy with
that on there mind. they both need time more than six months i say
ther is no time frame just when they are ready and right know they don't seam like it even if one says he or she is ready key word's are hate ex and love ex no good right know.
2006-08-14 19:01:25 · answer #7 · answered by shyprincess 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well...
i think if there's a little spark of love left in the engine of the marriage train, the couple won't alight at the divorce station.
Once they have concluded that "divorce is the word", that means "it's over".."the story is over".."nothing to shed tears on"..and it's time for a new journey....
"....and.. lift off" !!
2006-08-14 18:55:01 · answer #8 · answered by Sheefa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your divorced why should you wait. I think you should start dating as soon as the marriage is over. Life goes on.
2006-08-14 18:44:39 · answer #9 · answered by Dorrie 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Who says there has to be a set time? Whenever you feel like dating somebody else, do it!
2006-08-14 18:45:13 · answer #10 · answered by IthinkFramptonisstillahottie 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋