Why do people say I use my disability as an excuse, handicap, or crutch for my downfalls?

Question

Are they just ignorant? I have Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Tourette Syndrome, & Generalized Anxiety Disorder. My family falsely accuse me of being schizophrenic & crazy because they do not understand. They also tell me that no one is going to cater to me, and that I have to conform to society, and that I use my disability as an excuse for my symptoms of the disorders. The symptoms of the disorders are the behaviors. This is really getting to me. Also, many people are telling me that no one is going to hire me on the job. If my family feel like I'm crazy, then why do they get upset when I do what's not normal? Ex: washing my hands 50 times/day. Why do I deserve to be excluded from society because of my personality?

I'm a very good person, and I'm the 1st person in my family to get a college degree. I don't expect to live off of low income & be dependent all my life. I want to be an INDEPENDENT woman and do things for myself. I'm tired of being on SSI & Social Security.

Answer 1

You may want to find out if there is an organization or support group in your community that will help you live independently. You are not alone. If you made it through college with your "challenges" then you are to be congratulated. You obviously know how to behave, ignore the people who try to discourage you and just keep on succeeding.

Answer 2

A lot of disabled people are taught and socialized to use their disability as a crutch, sometimes it is a good excuse, other times it's crap. And being disabled naturally means you can't really function in real life, no matter how hard you try. Another reason why they may use it as a crutch is because some have a victim mentality or a lazy man's mentality. But not all disabled people take advantage of their disability there's some that prefer not to and live as normal as possible. And yes, autistic children do go to school like many other disabled children, sometimes these children go to special schools or stay all day in special classes. I'm not really sure what other reason disabled people get to cut in line, I'm not in a wheelchair but I'm physically disabled and the times I went to theme parks and places like that, I never got to cut in line, and I didn't know whether I could or not. And if you ask me I'd rather not cut in line.

Answer 3

First, you are a Katrina victim.
Then, a college graduate
who can't find a job.
NOW...you have a disability? You are OCD, you have tourette's, and general anxiety disorder...and you are on SSI?

I have MS, fibro-myalgae and mild OCD. I work full-time, and worked my way up to get the position I have. You can work, get off your tush and do something about it if you want. Or sit there and be a victim for the rest of your life. Your choice. I could be on SSI too if I really wanted to...but I said forget it!
And, no one can discriminate against a person regardless of race, sex, creed, religion, disability, etc.

Answer 4

Your family knows you better then anyone else. You keep bringing up the fact that you have a college degree but then you also say you have no job.
You also ask questions like:
What is the difference between Miss and Mrs
Which is something that a two year old would know.
Among other questions that lead me to believe that you are not what you want others to believe you are.
If anyone were to read your list of questions then they to would wonder if you are trying to make yourself out to be something that you are not.
Maybe your family is correct....You can not expect a bunch of strangers to be able to judge you in any other way then by the questions you ask and the answers that you give.

Thus my person opinion of you would tend to side with your family.

Answer 5

All those disorders in one person? You sure have a heavy burden to bear. You probably not using them as an excuse, just an explanation. All but the Tourette's are treatable with varying degrees of success. I hope that you can make some inroads with your OCD, which will definitely help with the anxiety! Best of luck to you!

Answer 6

You will probably be on SS and SSI all of your life. But good for you for wanting to be an independent individual! Be strong, take one day at a time and don't listen to the negative! Do your best at all you do and go for the most out of life! Make sure you take your meds and you DO NOT have to disclose your disability to your employer unless necessary!

Answer 7

Hmm.. good question. Maybe they feel guilty or depended upon and they aren't able to live up to the standards. Well, I have people who are physically and mentally handicapped in my family, but we would much rather encourage them to go out there like YOU are and make something of yourself. I honestly don't feel you're using your "disorders" as excuses, but I can see how others may. I mean, it's natural - sometimes others find these things hard to deal with, but don't worry. Keep up that great spirit, I pray you are successful, amen. :)

Answer 8

Since I don't know you it would be hard for me to say why people say this of you.

It does sound like you need to join a support group or something that can help you to integrate into mainstream society and find suitable work. There's no reason why you have to be marginalized because of your conditions. And if you made it through college then there's no reason why you can't find a good job.

Good luck!

Answer 9

i must say you have a lot on your plate. tourette is my main concern as far..as employment. outbursts in the work place.. i do not know about that.. is it under control with meds.. probably not. not fair for family to call names..but some actions..are controllable.. washing hands not as disruptive. does sanitizer work. seriously not being funny. if you really managed a college degree...you are over the hump. get a position to help others... with similar condition.

Answer 10

You need to analyze your own behavior. I suggest you bring this up to your therapist. It may be that your family needs a little education about your disabilities. It may also be that you are indeed using your disability as an excuse. Talk to your therapist about this. Your therapist should be able to give you literature for your family to read.