Pumping exclusively?

Question

I really wanted to breastfeed my baby boy (currently 10 week old). However, he was premature, and didn't even have colostrum when he was born. Because of his very low glucose level, and low body temperature, he was given a bottle in the hospital. Then, when I finally got my milk coming, he would not latch on. I saw a lactation specialist several times, but nothing worked. I am pumping exclusively, and I was able to establish a good milk supply (over 40 oz / day). I feed him breast milk only (from a bottle); no formula.
However, I feel very sad about not being able to breastfeed; I really wanted to experience this special relationship. This is my first baby, and probably the only one. Should I keep on trying to latch him on, or is it too late? Has anyone been in a similar situation?

Answer 1

It sounds like you've done your absolute best. I went through a similar situation with my daughter. She was born at 25 weeks. I pumped the entire time she was in the NICU and had a terrific frozen supply when she came home 79 days later. However, despite trying the nipple shield and consulting with Le Leche League and other lactation specialists at the hospital, my daughter was just too weak to latch on. She couldn't latch on at all, and the only time she did it was for only 7 minutes. I continued to try to get her to latch on, trying to feed her the breast milk from the bottle, and pumping. I just couldn't physically do it anymore. I decided that the best thing for my baby would be for me to stop trying to get her to latch on. It was frustrating for her, and not enjoyable at all. I also considered how she may have a slight oral aversion since she was on a vent for 19 days. I just didn't want to sacrafice nutrition for method at that point. I finished up my frozen supply 8 weeks after she came home.

I know how very much you wanted this. And I understand how much your heart grieves that "perfectly normal baby" experience. It's a shattered dream when our babies come early, to say the least. But please do not beat yourself up if your son doesn't end up latching on. You've tried soooo hard for your son, with obvious to desire to do what is best for him. And I know you don't want to feel like you failed him anymore than you already do (I completely understand the guilt we carry that it was our own body that failed our babies) but if he doesn't latch on, it's ok. It does not mean you are a bad Mother. It doesn't mean you gave up. It does not imply that you don't love him or care for him. What it means is that you tried your best and it didn't work out b/c of circumstances you could not control. I know how you are longing for that experience with him, and it hurts sooooo much. You can continue to try for as long as you feel comfortable. But if you do end up having to throw in the towel b/c nothing is helping, I just don't want you to feel guilty about it. You have a miracle baby there, and whether he latches on or not, he's still going to have an amazing relationship with you. He'll be loved and cherished, and never taken for granted. It's an amazing journey, watching our preemies grow up. I hope you'll concentrate on that and remember that you'll still be bonding with your son, regardless of how he is fed.

Answer 2

Keep trying to get a latch. Like all humans he is learning all of the time. There is no reason to not try to teach him to latch on. Good luck. I'm so proud of you choosing to pump and give it to him instead of taking the easy way out and switching to formula. Don't let anyone make you think that you are wasting your time. I pumped at work for over a year. The whole time I was questioned by other mothers at work about why I was bothering. They made me feel yucky, but I knew what I was doing was best and what I wanted. Don't give up hope. Keep trying. A lactation consultant is a great idea. If yours doesn't have ideas that work try consulting another one. They might have some ideas that your original one didn't have. Also, get a book. Lots of great ideas there. Maybe at every single feeding trying religiously to first breastfeed before trying the bottle. It might just "click" for him one day.

Answer 3

It's never too late. It's rare, but there are babies who have first latched on as late as 6-9 months.

One thing that might help is to eliminate all artificial nipples (bottles and pacifiers). If baby is willing to even try to nurse, it's best to give all his feedings at the breast (even if he isn't yet nursing *from* the breast). This can be done most easily by syringe feeding. You need to buy a syringe (any size, but the bigger it is, the less often you have to refill--*no needle*!!) at a pharmacy. Fill it with your pumped milk. While your baby tries to nurse, hold it near the corner of his mouth and drip the milk in to encourage him to nurse better and longer.

If he won't even let you try to nurse him, use the syringe the same way as you would at the breast. Try to nurse him again in 24-48 hours; by then, the nursing instinct usually has a chance to return.

Definitely be in touch with a local La Leche League Leader (see sources section below). This process can be difficult, and having someone who can give you support can make a huge difference!!

Answer 4

We had a somewhat similar problem. My daughter was suctioned pretty vigorously after birth and we're pretty sure that's what kept her from wanting to latch on at all. She would just scream and fuss anytime I tried. We were patient and kept trying when she was calm and content, and occasionally it would work, but my supply was low and my let-down is really slow so it didn't stick.

If you're going to try to keep latching on, you can try when he's either drowsy or happy. You may also want to try using a breast shield - it feels like a bottle to them so they latch on. I used one very successfully for a while.

Don't feel bad - you're doing the best you can for your son. If you can get him to latch on that would be wonderful, but be happy knowing you're still giving him the best food you've got.

Answer 5

How early was he? Sometimes premies will suddenly latch on around the time they hit what would have been their due date.

Have you seen a La Leche League Leader? She will help you for FREE.

Sounds like you are doing great with pumping! KUDOS to you!

Maybe try having skin to skin contact with him a lot and continue to try to latch him on at least once a day.

Have you tried pumping first to draw out your nipples before you try to latch him on?

Have you tried getting him started with a bottle and then switching to the breast?

Have you tried using a nipple shield?

Have you tried a supplemental nursing system (SNS) so it's a little easier for him to get something at the breast?

Have you tried taking a warm bath with him and trying to latch him on in the tub?

The link below may be helpful to you.

GOOD LUCK!
And GREAT JOB to you for pumping and providing him with your own milk!

Answer 6

When my baby was given the bottle at the hospital he still latched on with minimal problems. Sometimes it took waiting five hours for him to be really hungry for him to do it at first. I know it would be hard, but you could try that. Eventually he would have to figure it out if he wanted to eat.

Good luck

Answer 7

It is not to late my twins were in the NICU for 8 weeks it took me until they were almost 4 months to get them latching on good keep trying

Answer 8

you can get bottles that are shaoped more like a real nipple, like the playtex nurser. encourage him to open his mouth wide before taking in the nipple of thebottle, rather than just sucking it into his mouth. you can continue to try to latch him on, who knows, maybe one day it will work! if he is hungry he may learn! he may not want to latch on to you because he may not realize it is a source of food. try expressing a few drops of milk onto your nipple when he is hungry and trying to get him to latch on. just rember, you want his mouth to be wide and your nipple to be hard so he can latch on. when i was in the hospital i was embarrassed because they wanted me to tickle my nipples to get them ready before i latched on my son... right in front of the nurse. eventually when i was about to breastfeed my breasts would know and they would ready themselves. i really hope you can breastfeed your son. it is truly amazing and a very gratifying experience. good luck and happy feeding. just remember it's not how you feed your baby that counts, it's that it is done with love. that is all thjat matters. i honeslty admire you for taking on the challenge of exclusively pumping! it takes twice as long to do it that way! wow! best of luck- Rikki

Answer 9

keep trying. dont give up just dont be disappionted because your baby may get tired easy after being on the bottle. if he does take the breast be patient and dont stress out. atleast your baby is getting all the milk you can give.congratulations on the hard work.