Are people born gay or is it a choice that they may have subconsciously made? Can u stop being gay if u want 2

Question

I asked this because I have sen many talk shows,(some of the more legit ones like Oprah and Montel) where people have gotten on stage and claimed to have been gay, but made the decsion to not be gay. I am not gay, but I am trying to understand some gay people's actions.

Answer 1

i do believe that you are born gay...and you can choose if you want to live that lifestyle...you cannot stop being gay...if ur gay, ur gay...u can not practice it...and some choose to do that

Answer 2

Maybe this will add some understanding. I'm assuming that you are pretty much totally straight and old enough to know it in your bones. So, here goes. From the day you are born, your parents (two men or two women) tell you that it is wrong to be romantically or sexually involved with the opposite sex. The rest of your family tells you this as does your church and most friends. You grow up believing this but never feeling this. You get a little older and start dating -- same sex because that's what you've been told to do. You meet someone you really like, even love like family or a best friend. Then you meet someone of the opposite sex that makes your heart pound, you loose yourself in that person's eyes when you talk as if you can see each others souls, you know very deeply that the two of you are meant to be as close to one in body and heart. You think of them all the time. You feel empty when you are not together, but you know a lot of others say it's wrong -- but also know that others who are like you claim it is natural and right. You didn't look for this, you didn't think to try it on, it just is. And, then there is your partner, your friend, the person you love like family who loves you in a way you know you can never return. What do you do? What choice do you make? Maybe you say no and never see the one you genuinely love again. What happens the next time? What do you do? What choice do make -- continue to hurt yourself and your partner because someone else tells you how you should be without knowing how you really are?

You can chose to be yourself or pretend to be somebody other people want. That's really the only choice. No one chooses to be gay or lesbian, but some do live unhappily trying to chase the straight life. Hope that helps.

Oh, and about those who insist it is a choice... they are most likely to some degree bi-sexual. They can feel enough of an attraction to know that they chose to go with straight. They then believe everyone else is like them and therefore can make the same decision, too. It doesn't work that way. No two people are the same.

Answer 3

Are we born straight? As I understand it, we are all assumed to be straight right from the moment we fly out of the womb. Just the same way parents say he's gonna play football, or she's gonna be a model. All assumptions.

I chose to be gay. I was not born gay, then again I wasn't born straight. It has always been assumed I would be straight, marry a a wonderful lady and have beautiful children of my own. I guess society seems to thrust this idea of a "normal" life upon us. Afterall, at school we barely touch homosexuality in sex education. Why is that? Oh yes, to thrust upon us a heterosexual lifestyle. I wasn't trying to be rebellious or any such nonsence, but I chose to be gay because it made me happy. I knew I was when i was about 12 years old, but that's when I thought "hey, maybe there's more to life than what's being thrusted upon me". I'm gay and I would never look the other way. I am proud of who I am. People think that being gay is a big thing... it's not. it's just preference. Someone likeing one flavour of ice cream and another person liking a different flavour of ice cream. that's a big as it is.

I ask that you alter your question to see things from my point of view. "Are people born straight or is it a choice that they may have subconsciously made? Can u stop being straight if u want 2 ?"

Answer 4

This is the 3rd time I'm answering this tonight. It's getting old. Most studies claim that we are born gay or straight. Personally I don't care except some yokel will try to 'fix us'.People who claim to be straight were probably bi in the first place. You can claim anything. You can live in the closet too. Go be miserable the rest of your life or come out, accept yourself, and have a life.
The situation is very similar to a left handed person living in a right handed world - but having to live with shame and fear because others do not understand.
Try not to worry about whether gay people were born 'that way' or not. The bible thumpers will tell you one thing, the scientists will tell you something else.
Personally, if the medical world told me tomorrow that they figured out why and tthey could reverse it, there is no way in hell I'd want to be straight.

Answer 5

People are born gay. Studies have been done that prove this. You can't stop beign gay if you want to. There is a guy who is claiming to help gays become straight, it's a lie and a scam. He helping gay people learn how to be straight and help them get married and live a life of a lie. We all know deep down he wants a guy to have sex with, but he's so happy with his wife and kids...whatever. It's just a put on so he can make money and hissuccess rate is only real because the people he's helped are so brainwashed into believing that being gay is bad that they hide their true feelings. I say find those people...lure them into bed...and you'll see, they'll change right back the wya they should be. This guy needs to be stopped, because he's sending a false image that gays can live in straight lives. NO WE CAN'T. Not unless we want to live a lie, which only leads to depression then suicide. As I always say...F*ck these people...Live life and be yourself and stop caring what people say about you and quit trying to change for others...BE YOURSELF AND OTHERS WILL FOLLOW.

Answer 6

I think that you've been misled by all these answers, No, you are not born gay. God makes us all the same. We are given the CHOICE, aka free will, to do as we choose and in the end, God will then decide whether we've done his will when we were on earth. That doesn't make Gay or Lesbian people bad people, it just means they have made the wrong decision, based upon what God has intended for us. (I'm not saying anything to upset or offend anyone, either, by the way. This subject is so loaded, most of the time. ) We, as humans, are not suppose to judge anyone, once again, that is God's job. We need to accept everyone and what choicese they have made, and help them see the light, if possible.

Answer 7

You are born gay.

You can't stop being gay. A gay can try and act straight. They might even marry a straight person and pretend to be happy. But the gay feelings are always there. And then if they meet the same sex love of their life? They either get divorced or live a depressed married existence cheating on their spouse.

A gay sometimes will become a die hard homophobe. Any threat to their straightness will be upstage. The worst most hateful homophobes are secrety gays in denial. Science is proving it.

Just give your self enough time and education to deal with it. Read up on it. See gay films. Go to a gay lesbian community center. Go to gay sites.

Answer 8

Some people are born gay, but they don't later find out until they stop and realize about their sexuality. I believe I was born gay because I have several family members that happen to be gay, I believe it might of passed down to me, and all it had to do was just trigger something.

You can't stop being gay, no matter how hard you try, no matter how hard you go to therapy and try having someone tell you that you're not gay, you'll still have those feelings, and they'll grow stronger and stronger.

It sucks to go through those emotions but you can't stop being gay, all those videos you see of people going gay to straight, its still there but they just don't want to accept their sexuality.

Answer 9

God makes gay people just as they are. There's no choice involved. Who are we to question any of God's gifts to us?

Anyone who says they have "stopped" being gay or has been "cured," has probably just stopped acting on their natural sexual orientation. That doesn't make them any less gay, but it certainly makes them a lot more stressed out. Imagine what living that lie must be like!

True Christians and other good religious people work towards tolerance and understanding of all. Bigoted 'christians' and other religious people preach hatred, discrimination, and therefore violence against LGBT people. Which side are you on? :o)

Answer 10

Quite frankly, the bottom line really is "What a person does is between them and God." A sin is a sin (if that's the way you want to put it). Why is homosexuality being put up on a pedastal if lying condemns you to Hell just the same? Honestly, I hate judgmental bible thumpers. I believe in God, but God made us, and we should be proud that we are His creation.

Answer 11

Damn, the MOST original question EVER on this page. Someone wants to know if we are "born this way". OR, get this, this is the real good part of the question......can we stop if we WANT to!!!!! I have been waiting since the creation of Yahoo Answers for someone to ask that question and now my patience has been rewarded, finally my prayers answered! I thank the people responsible for the birth of Nyema...........sorry, had to vent.