My husbands best friend hates me, and talks about me behind his back ( I just found out, my husband didn't tell me, and he wasn't planning on it). He says I am big mistake and such...there's an age diff. Should I confront him, and if I do what should I say? Or should I just leave it alone?
2006-08-14 08:14:08 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Your husband has to sit him down and rip him a new one. By not doing that he is complicitly agreeing with him.
First of all, he's not allowed in your home.
Secondly, DH can't see him without YOU.
Then sooner he "gets" that you're not going away, the better.
Someone tried to put a riff between me and my DH, but it was a guy telling ME DH was a mistake! And there's a 16 year age difference between us. 13 years later, "Hello, I'm still here".
Get all your friends on your side and they can accuse him of being
1. Jealous
2. Gay (don't discount this possibility! "Brokeback fantasies, fella?")
Good luck!
2006-08-14 08:22:58 · answer #1 · answered by emilsignia 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forget it, treat such people as you would treat your relatives, forget about them and stay as far away as possible. Avoid confrontation, because he would've already won, because your husband has decided not to say anything on the matter and you are SUPPOSED to be his wife...so rest assured, he on the others' side on this one. People talk nonsense all the time, remember that what you say about others could also be said about you, so rest assured somebody somewhere must be talking about what a horrid person he is.
2006-08-14 15:42:15 · answer #2 · answered by cradle2resurrection 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends, I say that if it bothers your husband than yes confront him. Who is he that he can judge another person? Does he even know you or anything about you? If it doesn't bother him than leave it alone but just let him know that you know but you don't care what he thinks. Because to be honest if you spend all your life trying to make everyone else happy then you will never be happy yourself. And further more if he has the time to talk about then that means he thinks about you a lot. Maybe he doesn't hate maybe he wants you for his self.
2006-08-14 15:22:53 · answer #3 · answered by WildChild 0 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd sit your husband down and tell him that either he deals with the situation or you will. All this guy should care about is that his friend is happy. The age difference and whether marrying you was a mistake or not is none of his business. Period.
2006-08-14 15:23:55 · answer #4 · answered by Tish 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I were in the situation I would confront him. Tell him that those comments bother you and if that's how he feels, it's just too bad. YOUR husband chose YOU as his wife. His friend has voiced his opinion and that's as far as he should go...he needs to just accept it and go on. As for your husband, maybe he didn't tell you because he didn't want to hurt your feelings or maybe he didn't want you to know in order to avoid confrontation in the first place....but if it's bothering you (which is pretty obvious) I'd say go for it and get the stress off your chest. Hopefully he'll stop after you tell him how you feel.
Good luck in whatever you choose to do.
2006-08-14 15:22:59 · answer #5 · answered by makeitclap23 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your hubby should stand up for you. But, i personally next time I was with my hubby & his so called friend I would say "Hey, I heard that you said such & such about me, why would you say that?" I would say that infront of both of them. Just a suggestion.
2006-08-14 15:22:38 · answer #6 · answered by majesticwife 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is actually husband who needs to talk to him and set him straight. He marry you not his b/friend what does he care how you are and about the age. His b/friend should learn to have respect for you because now your married. Your husband needs to let him know and defend you. Like I tell my husband I don't have to like all your friends but I will give them respect as long as they respect me too. I am very surprise that your husb. is letting him talk about you.
2006-08-14 15:25:53 · answer #7 · answered by Strawberry 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats your hubbys job....to clear the air. he shouldnt stand for that and if he does then you got bigger problems then just the buddy.
2006-08-14 15:19:03 · answer #8 · answered by chevy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just ignore him.
2006-08-14 15:23:12 · answer #9 · answered by dnagsarkar 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋