Do partners change over time? Married young and now unhappy!?

Question

I was 18 and my wife was 19 when we got married. Now I am 23 and she is 24, but now i feel as if we are two different people. We both want different things out of life. Is this normal for couples who marry young?

Answer 1

Yes it's normal for all couples. The key is to help each other reach those goals.

Answer 2

Yes, I was one of them. People change over time no matter how old they are when they get married. Life changes people. But, let me hand you this piece of advice: At 23 and 24, you should be considering what you want out of life. If you do not agree on the same things, then maybe you should evaluate your relationship and see if it is worth working on or not. Marriage is suppose to be forever (granted: stuff happens). But, the grass is not greener on the other side. If you are just wanting to be single again, it's not worth it. Maybe you should just spend a little time away from each other for a while, but really think about it. Good luck!

Answer 3

18 & 19 is pretty young nowadays to pick who you want to spend FOREVER with! Im 23 & Im not ready to commit for a lifetime yet. People change considerably between 18 & 25, and again within the next 10 years is what Ive been told. You have to put a real effort into growing together or seperate.

Answer 4

My husband and I married when we were both 18. We are currently 29 and we are completely different people. We have two children and have seperated twice. We always seem to find our way back to one another though. I don't think it is due to love, it is more so because of our kids. We just want to do the right thing for them. I don't know if you have kids, but if you don't I would suggest getting out before you do. 18 is way to young to pick your life long companion. You don't know yourself much less know what you are looking for.

Answer 5

I know exactly how you feel. I got married when I was 18 and now am 35. My husband and I are not the same people we were when we got married. We not only want different things, but it's as if we are living totally separate lives.

Answer 6

The same thing happened to me...I was 18 and he was 19...Now I'm 23 and hes 24 and we are getting divorce and we are both much happier...Sometime things dont turn out how you think they will..But its for the better

Answer 7

My hubby and I are going through the same thing. I am now 23 and have been married for almost 5 years. It is very hard to know where we will end up.

Answer 8

Its normal for couples who marry without talking about what they want out of life regardless of age, and yes older people are foolish enough to make that same mistake! Come on thats common sense, you are vowing to spend your lives together and oops it just doesn't occur to them to disucss what they want that life to be? Yes its common and thats why people shouldn't marry young, they don't know who they are or what they want to be when they 'grow up' so how could they possibly know who they want to spend that life with? This is exactly why 50% of marriages fail.

Answer 9

I married young but my husband was older than me and had already gone through his changes and knew what he wanted out of life.I have changed since then and still have more changes to go through I know but I include him in my changes and my thoughts for the future, so we don't have a lot of problems. As long as you keep the lines of communication open, and trust in each other, I think it all works out ok.

Answer 10

i agree with heather i am 21 and married for 2 years but i married an older man so that has helped plus i was always more mature than all my friends, if i felt like i was gonna change so much i wouldnt have got married but his love and our happy life together means more to me than that.....it all depends on the 2 people.