So hurt...?

Question

My fiance and I got into a huge fight the other day. He ended up calling me a bunch of hurtful things. He also said that he was happy that we were breaking up because he would finally have a good lay. He then asked me to call over some of my friends so that he could f*** them. Then he called me fatty. He knows that I battled eating disorders for a long time, which means that I am bigger than I used to be, which still bothers me. I didn't consider myself fat until he said something, because he always told me that he loved me the way I am. after the fight was over, he wanted to get back together. But all he said was that if my weight bothers me, that I should do something about it (which I know is true, but I was kinda hoping he would at least apologize). Now I know I won't be comfortable naked in front of him. I am still so hurt and I don't know if I can be with him. But I'm afraid that breaking up is the wrong decision and that I'm overreacting. Please give me your opinions.

Answer 1

Thats the problem with a fight. mean hurtfull things are said that would not normally be said. And they last with us for ever.

Answer 2

I'm sure the whole thing will blow over. You're not over reacting, though. I have had an eating disorder, too, and if he knows that your weight still bothers you, he will use it every time. Don't let him know it still bothers you. I know it's hard, but it's always the people you love that hurt you the most. A lot of people say hurtful things they don't mean when they're mad. But I would have to ask him about the whole "lay" thing. That was just wrong. Good luck. I don't know why men act like big babies sometimes.

Answer 3

Now you know the real him. Girl this is a sign. Just imagine how your marriage will be if you marry him. He is no good. Once your married to him he is going to put you down and I am so sure he is going to cheat on you. Just go to the gym and get some confidence and then when your in shape he will regret the things he said. Don't take crap from him. You'll find someone who deserves you. Leave him! If he loved you he wouldn't put you down. It seems he is a lire and does not seem to love you. Is that what you want? Why are you still with him? He is only going to bring you down.

Answer 4

well either he just came up with that random crap trying to get at u or he finally let his true emotions out. i think atleast give him a week away from you and if he still will ask you out after that then go for it!

and the weight ur probably 140 and that's not very heavy but don't worry about ur weight so much be comfortable in ur skin and if it bothers u enough go to LA weight lose or curves or something like that

Answer 5

First off anger brings out some hurtful feelings. But, they are feelings in which they are thinking. You need to have your own opinion on how you look. Not, on what he thinks of what you look like. If he indeed said those things. Then you shouldn't even be considering going back to him. You are not overreacting. He is a pompass weasel. Whom doesn't respect you on the things you have accomplished or on how you take care of yourself. He is the one with the problem and you should be with someone who loves you and y our body. Not someone who only cares for his selfish needs.

Answer 6

1st Put your pants on and keep them on till you make up your mind. Take some time more than just 1 or 2 meetings.

Please don't bring a child into this mess until you find out that you guys can be together and be reasonable to each other...

Sounds to me that you should just break it off. If he's said hurtful things now he'll probably do so again.

Answer 7

He is an a.s.shole! Don't waste ur time with someone like this, obviously there are a lot of feelings there etc etc but he wouldn't say stuff like that unless he meant it right?

I am sure you are great the way you are, much better then that w.a.nker will ever be... make him jealous get another bloke... move on because what ever caused the fight, if he acts that way, he is clearly not worth your time..!

Answer 8

My goodness, if my bf were to verbally abuse me like that, i would have first kicked his you know what before packing and leaving. NO way will i even consider coming back to him even if he were to apologise 100xs. Trust me this guy ain't the guy for you, i have a similar experience with a guy who wasn't violent to me but just speaking hurtful things and threatening remarks. I hung on with it until one day i realised how stupid i was, he just wasnt't the guy for me, a guy who truly loves you wouldn't say such things. Please give him a kick in the you know where and leave him for good.TELL ME WHEN YOU DO THAT! Btw my relationship with that guy lastd 8 yrs i wouldn't want you to go through the same before realising its too late. Also now i have found the most wonderful husband in the entire world. I am so glad i dumped that other guy!!!!

Answer 9

Your kidding, right? Why would you want to be with someone who says such hurtful things? Even if spoken in anger, they are unforgivable. If you stay, you are telling this boy that this is how you want to be treated. That it is ok to make you feel like that. You can definitely expect more of the same.

Answer 10

Anyone who treats you that way is not worth being with. Let him go because if he cannot understand that you have battled issues and you need his support then why bother marrying him.