Before I met my husband I had many more sexual experiences than he did and being that I tell him everything he knows about them all. It bothers him so much infact that he feel that he should have the chance to have more sexual experiences while we are married. I try to tell him that's it's different now that we are married and that we weren't together and I didn't even know him when I was more promiscuous. But to him that doesn't matter he still feels that he should be able to get to have more experiences. Before we got married I agreed to having a 3 some which I'm still up for but so scared that our feelings will change toward eachother, especially mine. Of course due to my past I can not be with another man ever again, I have no desire to at all, but I just don't know if I am going to be able to handle seeing him or even knowing that he was inside of another woman while we are married. Any advise will be greatly appreciated.
2006-08-14 03:51:37 · 14 answers · asked by babe112083 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I've had the same issue also, she'd had just about every experience under the sun yet I was still sexually naive. One difficult thing about it is that I'd always wanted to do these things, I discovered I was with a girl I could do them with, yet she was already all "done" with that part of her life.
My advice is to help him blossom.
Have the 3-somes. You pick the girl. Talk with him about what lines are not ok to cross before hand. Maybe go to some swinger's parties and let him feel like he's living the sensual lifestyle for a while. Avoid jealousy at all costs. Find out what other fantasies he has that you'd be willing to help fill. Then just be patient with him. It's intimidating to know that your woman has so much "experience" if you haven't. He'll slowly become more comfortable with his sexuality and yours, then he'll be more comfortable helping you fill any fantasies you may have lingering. Eventually you guys will more easily fade into monogamy and the "boring" sex that marriage brings :)
Lastly, don't be as uptight as some of the people who've already answered. Everyone blossoms at a different time, and some of us just need someone experienced we can trust to help us along. It's made my bond with my girl stronger. It was never an excuse to sleep with another girl. If I wanted to do that I would just do it behind her back, cheating isn't hard to accomplish, but I haven't and I won't. Jealousy is a product of ignorance, it's from not knowing how your other will act in a situation of duress. Would you be more worried knowing that he won't get that with you and he'd better just deal with it, or knowing that the two of you have been through it all together and came out the other side together?
2006-08-14 04:06:46 · answer #1 · answered by dascatalyst 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bare with me this will all tie in. A girlfriend and I went out one night. She ended up picking up a guy I was checking out. I asked the next day how it was. She said she really likes him but sex was a 4 on her scale.
My husbands and newest beau. Are far less experienced than me. I told my girlfriend. I can turn a 4 into a 10. And so should you be able to. With your experience and without anyone joining your love making.
It sounds as though your husband feels he can get more experience from other women. You are all the woman he should need or want. There are books on love making. Role playing and spicing up your love life. If you are already feeling sick thinking about watching make love to another woman. Can you imagine if it really happens. Follow your intuition. Use your knowledge and he won't even consider another partner. Well maybe.
2006-08-14 04:13:56 · answer #2 · answered by Balou 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
What's your respective age? If you're the same age or younger than he is, then it's his own fault for not sowing his wild oats when he had the chance. He didn't take advantage and he shouldn't expect you to let him now if you're not comfortable.
If you're significatnly older than he is, though, then you probably married him when he was too young, so you should have known something like this was likely to happen. In that case, I'd strongly advise you to try to get past your jealousy and try a threesome. It's really not that big of a deal for men. He'll still love you just as much. If you deny him the chance, 90% likely that he'll just cheat on you later.
2006-08-14 04:00:39 · answer #3 · answered by Steven S 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell your husband that you don't want to share him with anyone else and the only sexual experience you need is with each other. As you probably know, just because you had more experiences than him, the sex may not have been as good as with him. Let him satisfy you. If you have reservations now about having a threesome, then don't do it. It could change things for you, he could expect it more often and it could lead to other things (open marriages, etc). I could not handle seeing my boyfriend with another woman, and I would feel disgusted every time I thought about it.
Let him know that he is the only man you want and need.
2006-08-14 04:00:10 · answer #4 · answered by torn 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I will tell you that you need to trust each other completely to have a 3some. My wife and I have and it has been great but there are no trust issues. If there is trust issues, don't do it. If you don't think you can handle it I would say not to do it because its not like you will ever forget it. It is fun if done correctly but don't just do it for him, make sure you both want it. Trust me, once you do it, if you didn't like it you won't want to do it again. I guarantee he will want to do it again and that may get in the way of your relationship. Don't do it just for him.
2006-08-14 04:02:19 · answer #5 · answered by J D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
MMMM drop the "10" kilos wink wink Then this guy is loopy. If he has a low lobito now, then you definately will back in a million 12 months asking a thank you to cheat without getting caught. Sorry in simple terms attempting to be actual.
2016-10-02 01:41:50 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he is just using an "excuse". It shouldn't matter. If you two decide to go through with the 3 some sit down and make some rules. Like he can't *** inside her. (this is just an example). Find some rules you both can agree on.
Good Luck
2006-08-14 04:05:43 · answer #7 · answered by Wally 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
dont let him do it...this is an exucse just so he can hook up with another girl...stop talking abt wht u have experienced and talk abt wht ur doing together...if he loved u he wouldnt want to do that...experience in my case would mean...him learning whr to touch u...or how certain positions feel and stuff...but he has u so y wouldn't he want to try it with u?...being with another person is just comparing the two to see who does better then the other...if ur smart u shouldnt let him do that...and everyone that has done a threesome with thr sig other...has either broke up or got a divorce...dont ruin urself like that
2006-08-14 03:58:21 · answer #8 · answered by chaand5 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Bloody hell. Why did you ever agree to such a thing? I don't even know if this can be salvaged. You have let him know of your trampy past and it is eating at him to the point where he kind of wants to even the score. All I can say is good luck.
2006-08-14 03:57:39 · answer #9 · answered by AsianPersuasion :) 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just be plain honest, about your feelings and talk to him to
make things right for both.
Maybe you can perform some role playings for him as other girl. I do not know.
2006-08-14 04:03:06 · answer #10 · answered by Carlos 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋