What am I in awe of?
In our life we have to answer questions
Some are from school
And some are about our life
Some are easy and some are hard,
But forget about the our and lets talk about me
Because the question is what I am in awe of
And it’s all about me
I am an in awe of earth
I am in awe of sky
I am in awe of every moment I have lived till now
I am in awe of family
I am in awe of friends
I am in awe of every one and everything I love
I am in awe of desire
I am in awe of pleasure
I am in awe of these things because
Everything in my life is a treasure
A treasure that will stay behind
Even when I die
Because that treasure is memories of my life
Written by: ME
2006-08-14 03:48:35 · 10 answers · asked by Kush 2 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Visual Arts ➔ Other - Visual Arts
well seriously speaking... the fact that it is your personally written poem... i would say wonderful...
Every personal creation is a beauty in itself...
2006-08-14 03:53:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
U are on the right track... you have your topic and you have a voice and something to say about it. Unfortunately you are not saying what you want in a poetic form. To me it sounds like strait philosophy. My recommendation: use more adjectives. Using some unique and deep descriptive words would help dress up this poem for example say towering sky, burning desire, or lingering pleasure. Also use some alliteration like Endless Earth, the two words use the same initial sound it make it more pleasing to the ear and mind... just don’t use too much Alliteration. Lastly read some of the Greats of Poetry like William Yeats, or Ezra Pound and "Stand on the Shoulders of Giants". Good Luck
2006-08-14 13:18:11 · answer #2 · answered by drglizard 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pretty good, but repetitive. But it begs the question Why are you in awe of these things? So it got me thinking, anyway. Good luck.
2006-08-15 10:23:31 · answer #3 · answered by Betty 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
good one but does not gt the perfect effect not enough emotions try to be be cretive i myself write when am feeling i shud this poem sounds as if u r bound by too many ideas but little words and it shows guess u tried too hard let the words come ur idea is lovely i loved it but if u want me to rate it i'l give four out of five dear ur good no doubt widen ur ideas let them come and u'l be the best
2006-08-14 10:57:29 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hallmark! Study the masters of poetry. Keep writing!
2006-08-14 10:55:34 · answer #5 · answered by Sandra G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't want to be a jerk,but this is a good poem if you are under 18.If you're older it's too immature,sorry
2006-08-14 10:53:35 · answer #6 · answered by justgoodfolk 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
love the idea,the language is repetitive,but it has a child like innocence.just an honest opinion.
2006-08-14 10:53:02 · answer #7 · answered by knu 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very good, I like it, but it in a scrap book and add to it, keep writting, OK!!!
2006-08-21 20:20:17 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
man,u should bcom a poet, u r so good!!its fantasic!!!!!!i lov it very much.
2006-08-14 10:55:20 · answer #9 · answered by Emma D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
good start
2006-08-21 15:53:49 · answer #10 · answered by Kalahari_Surfer 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋