Today is my ex wife's birthday.
Head full of running thoughts. I'm sorry for what I did to hurt her and end our marriage. I'm hurt that she didn't even try reconciliation. I miss her more each day, especially special days that we used to share. I'm sad that nothing I could do - birthday card, e-card, short email - would be positively received. I so wish things could be different.
And yet, here we are again. Another day of thinking of her, like a life prison sentence where there is nothing but thoughts of the life I had with her that is now gone and what I did to put myself here.
2006-08-14 02:40:18 · 22 answers · asked by DW 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Background: I had an addiction (not drugs) that hurt her very badly. We've been divorced for a year and a half. I don't know her phone number - it changed when she moved. Last time I tried to do something nice for her (Christmas-time), it was not well received at all. Last thing I heard from her was, "if there will ever be contact, I'll call you."
2006-08-14 03:04:34 · update #1
This world is full of woulda, coulda, shoulda, and I didn'ts. You are no exception to the rule. Send a birthday card with a note inside, appoligize for being the 'ding-a-ling'. How fresh are the wounds? and are they too deep to ever heal? Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned and we don't forgive and forget so easily. However a card and note to let her know you are thinking of her and miss her is not a crime. No chance of reconcilliation?, don't fret, be the bigger person that you weren't before and wish her well in the new life she is choosing without you. In time when she has had time to recover some from the saddness, offer friendship. Because things ended on bad terms is no reason they have to stay that way. Regaining her trust in any situation is going to be iffy, so don't be discouraged if she gives you the cold shoulder for a while. In the meantime, learn from the mistakes you made the first go round, and should you find love again, you will know what not to do and be better person on the inside for it. Do not send her something for the occasion so impersonal as and email or ecard. Make it hand-writen with love, honesty, and sincerity. Send her a single yellow rose, the color of friendship. Don't just tell her, sorry, show her. There is no future in your past. Make peace with it or her somehow or it will haunt you in all your relationships. PRAY for some guidence.
2006-08-14 03:06:44 · answer #1 · answered by MrsPTB4Life 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Everything happens for a reason man. It's too bad the choices you made resulted in divorce, but we ALL have choices. You can either learn from them, or beat yourself up the rest of your life. There's someone for everyone, and although you thought she was your someone, she's not...you should get out there and date. It'd be good for your soul. Don't dwell on what might've been, cause your situation was already planned before it ever happened. You're a single part of this universe, and believe it or not, your life has already been worked out to be a small piece of this huge puzzle called life. Just take it for what it is and move on. You can pray for God to give you the strength, and keep your head up no matter what. It's not the end of the world (yet), so get out there and LIVE! We only get one chance at this thing called life, so have fun and be happy! Do you honestly think she's not doing the same????
2006-08-14 10:29:42 · answer #2 · answered by Shining Ray of Light 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why odnt you write her a letter telling her how you feel, if u really do feel the way you say...and i accepted it...then i'm sure that your ex will too. you sound emotionaly torn, and i'm sorry you fell the way you o..but i dont think i would be such a probalem if you sent her a short email on her birthday, or any other special holiday...giving gifts from the heart will show her that you care, and soon enough she'll fall in love with you again...maybe...so all in all if she knows that you truely love her with all your heart, then maybe she wont shut you out of her life as much, and these special days and time being, wont seem as hopeless as ou think...you dont have to be married to someone to say u love them...you guys can be friends if you tried...good luck, and i hope everything works out with you two!!!
2006-08-14 09:47:43 · answer #3 · answered by fuzzy19 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From the sound of you, seems like you may have stepped out when you were married. If not, I apologize, but if so...then really you just need to learn to move on without her. You made a choice to hurt your wife, and she made a choice to not put up with it. At this risk of sounding mean, you made your bed...now you need to lay in it. Dont wine about how much you miss her and love her, when you were with her you apparently werent thinking about what you could do to make her happy. My best to you and I hope you get through this difficult time.
2006-08-14 09:48:57 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are going to think about her alot, especially on special days. I am not sure what you did to hurt her, but she is going to have to heal. Just because you are sorry and miss her so much, does not mean that she feels the same way.
I am not sure how long you guys have been apart, but you need to move on with your life. I am not saying that you shouldnt be thinking about her. I am saying that you shouldnt stay stuck.
2006-08-14 09:44:27 · answer #5 · answered by chipmunk 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ahhhhh, the dreaded pity party. It sucks, but we all go through it. Sometimes, men never realize what they had until they throw it all away. Well, she's gone now so it's time for you to get on with your life and start living again.
Hope you've learned a valuable lesson.
2006-08-14 09:43:56 · answer #6 · answered by kja63 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look Friend
if u cant have her back then its time to move on , don't waste ur time in mourning its over u got a devorce , that doesnt mean that u r a bad person nor is she but its just that u cant be with each other
2006-08-14 09:45:18 · answer #7 · answered by Kalypsee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Write her a letter...by hand. Tell her you know your words can't make the hurt stop but you are deeply and truly sorry and hope she can one day forgive you, tho you never expect her to forget. And tell her exactly as you worded it here...like without her is like a prison sentence.
2006-08-14 09:46:21 · answer #8 · answered by empress_pam 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no turning back for your ex must have meant that you have hurt her extremely badly. If you want a recall, you got to work triply hard, will you? If she has been taken up, don't. Always treasure what you have and not regret later on. "Sieze the day".
2006-08-14 09:47:50 · answer #9 · answered by j t 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her happy b-day and that u really r sorry 4 all the divorce stuff, but dont act desperate like u mis her a whole bunch cuz that may creep her out and ruin the whole thing!
2006-08-14 09:45:33 · answer #10 · answered by bob_rox77 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋