I have thought I was a lesbian since like 3rd grade because I have never even looked at guys like that at all and only like girls. Iam involved with a different girl everytime I turn around and Iam kinda girl crazy! But now I think Iam starting to get feelings for this guy...He is "friends with benefits" with this girl I REALLY like so I thought I'd keep my enemy close and get to know him when she left to washington. But I got drunk with him the other night and found out he had intrest in me. I made out with him a couple times that night and I think I could be falling for him. He calls me about once a day wondering if I can hangout with him.I think about him alot now but I only think i might like him. I do think he is really attractive but he doesn't turn me on as much as a girl does. Is all this weird? Is having feelings for this guy normal? I don't think Iam bi because I never check out guys at all...Just this one...????
2006-08-14 01:57:18 · 15 answers · asked by Faye 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Iam 17 now and was pretty damn sure I was lesbian and still do...But there is just something about this guy....
2006-08-14 02:05:02 · update #1
That is perfectly normal.... you dig someone and you've developed strong feelings for them.... male, female or other.... it doesn't matter. Why label ourselves? They only limit our life experiences.
Have some fun, explore something new, it doesn't change who you are. If you follow your heart, you can't go wrong.
You'll come to learn, as you get older, that the people who you want to keep close to you will love you no matter what. So just be yourself, do what feels right and you'll be just fine.
2006-08-14 03:12:37 · answer #1 · answered by mutherwulf 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It could be a case of reverse experimenting. You know, girls who are straight and then decide that they have fallen into lust, like or love with another woman. Sometimes they have, and sometimes it's just that....and experiment.
I have a friend who is going through the same thing right now. She's 19 and has not (until about 2 months ago) been with a guy. She said she was just trying to figure out what all the fuss is about sleeping with a guy.
No one can tell you what your sexual orientation is....only you can know that. But (and this is speaking as a lesbian) why is it any one's business? So you have the hots for a guy. So you might act on them. It's not going ot affect me any, so why should I care? And why do we have to live with so many labels?
Well, I think I know the answer to that one. It's the same reason why so manny people in the lesbian community have problems with bisexual women. Most lesbians feel that we have had to struggle for so long to gain any kind of recognition or positive change as lesbians, and then here are people who can have "hetero" relationships and get away from intolerance and then have lesbian relationships when convenient. I don't think like that, but a lot of people do.
Just let it ride itself out. And, btw, maybe this is a time for you to back off of relationships for a while. Seems like you're always getting into, or out of, a thing with someone. Ever thought about slowing down and figuring yourself out for a change?
2006-08-14 09:50:55 · answer #2 · answered by Autumn BrighTree 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
physical and emotional attraction are always normal. In the best of all possible world labels about sexual preference would be unnecessary, one would simply be with the one they cared about.
Having been out as a gay man for almost 20 years I can tell that although 99% of the people I find sexually and emotionally attractive are men, there is still the occasional woman that catches my eye.
Since you are 17 why limit your experiences? Explore everything this world has to offer before making your final decisions.
Someone once said (H.L. Mencken I think) "A man shouldn't choose his religion, his political party or his drink before 30" Sage advice.
BTW, I don't think homosexuality is a choice. I do think we are each wired into what we find attractive and what we want sexually, but I do believe in the concept of the Kinsey scale. Maybe you're 4 rather than a 6
2006-08-14 09:11:07 · answer #3 · answered by rehobothbeachgui 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are 17, and exploring. I'm not sure you are ready to know fully what your sexual orientation is. It sounds like you are lesbian, and just exploring this guy thing. You could be bi. You could discover that you're straight. As our sexual orientation is usually set in us, it is our experiences that lead us to discover them. Just make sure that your relationship with anyone you are with is caring, respectful and safe. This guy you're with now, sounds like he's been around and knows how to manipulate you...after all, he's supposed to be your friends guy, right? And you're making out with him? And there's another good question to ask yourself. If he had not been with the girl that YOU like, would he be so interesting to you? Just take it slow.
2006-08-14 09:45:03 · answer #4 · answered by michael941260 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Who knows who is 100% straight or gay? Maybe we are all just on some specrtum inbetween, changing as we grow and experience more of life and meet more people. Maybe we all get attracted by the person beneath the gender, rather than simply the characteristics of the genders themselves? Best of luck, regardless.
2006-08-14 09:01:32 · answer #5 · answered by inquisitor 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i don't think u r a lesbian bec u were in 3rd grade still a little kid and now u have feeling to this boy so go ahead and live normal
2006-08-14 09:02:44 · answer #6 · answered by missy 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
dude just go for the guy, it doesnt mean you bi or whatever, its just an attraction, you go through stages n stuff, but just cos you dont check out guys doesnt mean your not bi you might just not be physically atrracted to them but this guy it could be more an intimate thing
2006-08-14 09:01:01 · answer #7 · answered by master_psin 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are probably attracted to him as a person and not just a sex object, and yes, that is normal.
2006-08-14 09:00:31 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think that ur perfectly normal. It's nothing bad in loving some1. So don't be afraid...It's very normal...and....i think u r not lesbian...
2006-08-14 09:02:49 · answer #9 · answered by Alexandra 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
sounds like u get the best of both worlds!!
2006-08-14 08:59:59 · answer #10 · answered by ???????????? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋