My bf and I have been dating for 6 yrs now...lately, I wanted to discuss the idea of getting married...I had brought up previously and he said he wasn't ready, now he says he is still not ready but, he says he knows he wants to marry me, but why won't he talk about the details? By this I mean, why won't he talk to me about what he wants for our future, like if he wants kids or if his parents will come and live with us from time to time? Or how religion will influence our home ( ie. I don't eat beef and pork for religious reasons and he eats everything) or what languages can be spoken in the home (We are multilingual and the language I speak at home is different from the language he speaks at home and we cpeak english) Aren't these things important to discuss before marriage?
2006-08-13 19:11:22 · 11 answers · asked by Strawberry 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I do enjoy being with him, but I would like to know if this relationship has a future or not.
2006-08-13 19:20:27 · update #1
Hmmm 6 years, says he wants to get married but won't talk details?
I'm sorry but this is not good. How old are you guys? He might have real commitment problems but if you think it's at that point where you should be getting ready to get married then it's unfair of him to keep you waiting. You need to force this guy to at least talk about the subject.
If he really cares about you then if you tell him your concerns he will try to ease and answer those concerns. Just bring up the subject as a "if we get married" and see how he answers. To be honest I think it's unfair and a bit pathetic that he leaves you wondering about this stuff. I've talked to girls about "if some day we get married" when I've only been with them for a couple months... it's something that can be fun to talk about.
Let him know that you're legitimately concerned and if he loves you he will help. If not then perhaps he isn't the one for you, and you deserve better.
2006-08-13 19:20:47 · answer #1 · answered by d.anconia 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
In my experience, a man knows if he wants to marry a women within 3 years of dating. If he has not poposed at that time he has no intention of doing it. It's either because he doesn't like the general idea of marriage or the specific idea of marrying you. He may not even know which himself.
Break up with him and move on.
2006-08-13 19:18:10 · answer #2 · answered by Wyld Stallyns 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is important to discuss before a marriage and these are all to the done in past dating experience. I think He is not ready to marry you.
2006-08-13 19:18:55 · answer #3 · answered by Somi 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is very very important to discuss all these points before marriage for a happy and satisfied life .
2006-08-13 19:15:27 · answer #4 · answered by your noon 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
haha, guys will always fear the future, maybe the fact is he doesn't know, or if he brings up an idea, he might be afraid that you'd get pissed. these things that important if you ask me. when it comes to starting a family, nothing ever goes as planned just remember that.
2006-08-13 19:16:18 · answer #5 · answered by squablysquakaly 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he never wants to get married. There's no law that says when a couple has been together for a certain amount of time they HAVE to get married.
Marriage ruins relationships. Just enjoy the fact that you are together and if it happens, it happens.
2006-08-13 19:14:20 · answer #6 · answered by Kenn 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
if you have not cleared the air on such matter as religion, kids and money
then you marriage ( should you be foolish enough to go foward with it ) will be doomed to fail,
you simply cannot go into this thinking it all will work out
2006-08-13 19:16:17 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
whats the rush girl? Do you love him?,or do
you just want a husband? Why not enjoy him,
and when the time is right,it will happen!!!
Marriage shouldn't be nagged or pressured
into. If you love him,enjoy being with him!!!
2006-08-13 19:19:24 · answer #8 · answered by slappingfox 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He's not ready and you're probably scaring him away with all of those issues. If you just want to marry him, focus on positive things and bring up all those other questions after you're married.
2006-08-13 19:12:49 · answer #9 · answered by Randy Marsh 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
you got me curious. What religion doesn't eat beef or pork?
Add to your Q, please or IM or email me. Contact info on my personal page.
2006-08-13 19:14:21 · answer #10 · answered by Jon 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋