Atheists..what about my boyfriend who was shot and killed...?

Question

He was a few years older than me and my parents loved him limitlessly. They had OKed my marriage to him. I had already been appeared to by Jesus and healed of cancer, He was in law school and so passionate. One night he interfered with two men who were harming two girls. There was a struggle and he was shot. A few hours alter he died. I had never been with him sexually. He respected me to the end. I thought I would die from grief but one day the Lord Jesus appeared 2 me in a vision and brought him to me. This happened several times. I dont want ur pity. But, as I went to his grave I was not in despair anymore. i knew this was not the end..but the beginning of 4ever for him becoz I had seen him with the ressurected Jesus. Are you going to tell me this was all my imagination ? You are going to tell me my mind manufactured this ? Will you tell me that I have no hope and he is just rotting in the grave ? You really think this is the ned of all things ? or does love reach beyond the grave ?

Answer 1

You will see him again, when you return to the father. Don't let Anyone question your faithl. So what if they don't believe what you do. Keep your eyes on Christ.

Answer 2

Well, I don't really know what to tell you. I thinkI answered a question similar to that and I think it might have been yours.

Here's the thing I _don't know_ what happens to us after we die. There, you and I are alike. As I've never lived in your head, I can't say anything about any visions you've had. But I can tell you with certainty that there is no one on this planet who knows where we go when we die. There are merely those who believe that they know and those who admit that they don't.

Apart from that, I don't know what to tell you. I mean, we're all human and we all need to find peace in our own way. I'd never question the validity of _how_ we find that peace. If a Buddhist can find peace in the notion that a loved one may have reached Nirvana, then that's great. Neither you nor I believe in Nirvana, but I do believe in its power as a concept to help people accept unfortunate realities.

I wish I could believe it myself. Nirvana, heaven, whatever. I mean, why not? Why not have the peace that your experience has given you? Do you presume to think that I wouldn't _like_ to see my loved ones again? I'm just as human as you - have the same joys and sadnesses. The only problem is that I'm 'cursed' with an inability to put my faith in things I don't believe. I don't really understand what makes you so hostile to that. Are you _threatened_ by the fact that I don't believe in heaven? I'm not threatened by the fact that you do...

It would give me great comfort to think that I had enough money in my bank account to live the rest of my life in comfort. I would love to believe that I'm actually independently rich. It's a good fantasy. I'd also like to believe that I have movie-star good looks and I stop traffic wherever I go. But then I have to accept, uncomfortable though it may be, that I'm just an ugly guy who has to slog through his work to feed his family. Facing up to unfortunate realities is an important growing and learning experience. Some of us merely do it in more detail than others.

Answer 3

Atheist here.

I'm not gonna tell you that your mind manufactured all this, I also won't tell you that you have no hope and I even agree that love reaches beyond the grave.

I have loved and lost too and found comfort in memories, not in faith. Of course i never stopped loving after the person died.

If you found comfort in your beliefs, then who am I to refute that? I don't believe in any God or afterlife, but i also know that we humans are too small to be certain. Nobody holds the full truth, nobody can be sure of how we exist, why we exist and what will happen after we die. You and me simply have different beliefs.

If your beliefs comfort you, then i can only applaude that. I hope you can also applaude the fact that i find my comfort in other beliefs.

Answer 4

I don't think that it was your imagination; when people use their imagination, it's intentional.

I think it's safe to say that these apparitions were manufactured by your mind, though. Grief does things to people.

Have you no hope? I don't think so. I'm sure you'll find someone else to love, in due time.

And yes, he's just rotting in the grave. That doesn't mean you're going to stop loving him, though.

It's a fact of life: people die. It actually hurts a lot less when you understand and accept this as a natural part of being human. You won't miss the dead any less, but you won't be hysterical with grief either.

The key isn't to clutch to the memory of someone who's dead, wishing they were still alive (or trying to convince yourself that you'll see them again). The key is to realize that life goes on.

Answer 5

Why does it matter what any of us think?!? These experiences were uniquely yours. YOU are the only one who needs to question or affirm their veracity. Frankly, it doesn't even matter whether your imagination manufactured these experiences. If they were real and meaningful to you, that's all you need. Unless you're somehow insecure in your own faith and need affirmation from the wider world, then sit quietly with these experiences, consider them a gift, and allow them to inform the way you live the rest of your life.

Atheists, by the way, do not necessarily discount the possibility that death is simply a transition into spirit, that the spirit world is beyond the reach of our human understanding, or that the membrane between the two realities is, or at least can be, porous. None of these things necessitate the belief in a creator, puppeteer god.

Regardless, I'm so sorry for your loss. I wish you peace.

Answer 6

Being a student of the metaphysical it would be closed mined of me to say that what you experienced wasn't real. I firmly believe that your experience was real and that in the realm of our current understanding of these things you could characterize it in a religious context. I believe that your experience metaphysically can best be summed up this way; Human experience is always growing as with our knowledge and though we may not have a way of fully explaining all that happens, scientifically, doen't mean that the experience doen't exsist. Hopefully someday we will.
Yours was an experience of how our life force is a continium.

Answer 7

Sorry about your loss. I'm glad to hear your boyfriend was a man of action and although he passed away way before his time you can be proud he had the courage & conviction to be a good samaritan. Cherish your memories & keep him close to your heart, a man of that character is not easily forgotten.

Answer 8

Dear, I understand that you are grieving. I am an agnostic, one who believes that it is intellectually irresponsible for anyone to claim knowledge of God. The fear of death drives many people to religion. The thought of annihilation is overwhelmingly dreadful to most people - after all, our ego wants to survive. We enjoy life, even the rough parts. All nature expands. It is the way of everything.

So if you have hope that your boyfriend exists beyond the grave, it makes sense. You're human. But I will tell you that no one knows for sure. And just in case we are annihilated after death - the best thing to do is live this life, live it well and to the fullest, and to try and make others happier, for our time here is much more precious if death is the end.

Rather than focus on what you have lost, focus on what you have now.

Answer 9

keep the faith yes you will see him again. How awesome to have seen that what a blessing. God is real and it takes his true believers and followers to be able to see visions such as those. My husband and i were having marital problems not too long ago and he was lusting after someone and one service he attended at church brong him a vision he was lead into a beautiful room lit with candles and infront of him was Jesus standing next to someone in a white gown and beautiful veil my husband lifted the veil in his vision and it was me behind the veil, so God spoke to him to let him know that our marriage was meant to be and was chosen to happen by God. It would be nice for all the world to see what God can really do for them and that he is real. He is beautiful beyond description and I will cherish my God all my life.

Answer 10

I'm agnostic, but why would you put a question like this on for everyone to see. You are either fishing for sympathy, or your using your tragedy to get your point across. Either way, it is not a very cool thing to do. This should be very personal to you, and cherished only by you, your are obviously still in great doubt about your beliefs or you wouldn't be using this in this kind of forum. This is your own personal battle, between your rational mind and your belief. You should not be dragging us into this very personal dilemma that you are having. The true enemy to your belief is you not us.

Answer 11

Not out of pity, but out of compassion, I am truly sorry for your loss. I affirm that your boyfriend, having a soul, has moved on to where he needs to be. He sounds like a really good man. We could use more of them on this side of God's creation.

Agape