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my brother died when i was three and i don't remember him at all..when people ask me how many brothers and sisters i have i usually don't include him..i don't really know what to say because i feel bad for not including him but i don't want to go into it when i'm talking to people i don't know very well..what should i say? does this make any sense?

2006-08-13 17:47:47 · 19 answers · asked by yowww kelly clarkson 4 in Family & Relationships Family

19 answers

I think you should tell people what you feel comfortable telling them. Since you never really knew your departed brother, I think it is ok if you don't include him when enumerating your siblings. You truly don't owe anyone any information you do not want to reveal.

2006-08-13 17:51:14 · answer #1 · answered by tooyoung2bagrannybabe 7 · 0 0

You should just say that you have (for example) "3 brother and 1 sister. My older brother passed when i was 3" you don't need to go into details. People will prob give u a saddened look and maybe ask how or why but you just need to respond with i was to young at the time to know and i don't like to talk about it. You can then swiftly change the subject around to those who are still living and brag about them. Difficult one, but people understand that losing siblings is hard and they prob won't press the issue.

2006-08-14 00:54:35 · answer #2 · answered by lounursey 2 · 0 0

Yes. It makes perfect sense. Don't feel guilty about not including him. Most people don't really want to get into heavy conversations about deceased family members anyway.
If your uncomfortable discussing your brother then they will be uncomfortable as well. Save yourself a life of awkward moments and stick to claiming your surviving siblings.
The fact that you would agonize over the decision to include or exclude him. Says a lot about you. You may not remember him but by caring you honor his memory. And that's more than enough.

2006-08-14 01:00:44 · answer #3 · answered by genuine1 3 · 0 0

well I had a brother and sister (fraternal twins) that died when I was around 5 .. when people ask me over the years I say well I have an older brother and my mother had a set of twins that passed away when I was 5. I leave it at that.. With people that I just meet or dont' know well I just mention my older brother..

2006-08-14 00:53:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Count the ones that are alive cause if u say u had another brother but he died then u have to go into this long explanation on how you were only three and you didn't know him and they'll start crying and to avoid all that, just exclude him.

2006-08-14 00:53:04 · answer #5 · answered by Simmi Reds 2 · 0 0

this does make sense. but i think you should include him. its like if your mom was ur brother in this situation you still had a mom at one time so you would still include her. its almost worse that you dont include your brother. if they ask about him just say the truth...he passed away when you were three so you didnt really know him or dont remember that much..

its better to include him. well..i think it is.

hope this helps =]

2006-08-14 00:52:01 · answer #6 · answered by britt 1 · 0 0

When anybody asks, how many sibs you have, they don't usually want to hear you go into a discussion about lost family members. They want to know how many live ones you have. I don't know if that sound kinda harsh, but it'll probably make the conversation alot easier for you as well as for them. Now, the topic of your baby bro might come up LATER, but then that's diferent. Don't just throw something like that at them before they even know you. honestly, that kind of personal.

2006-08-14 00:56:41 · answer #7 · answered by hawt2trawt 3 · 0 0

It's a past tense versus present tense. People ask how many brothers and sisters you "have", i.e. right now. Don't feel bad for not mentioning your brother because they're not asking about the past.

2006-08-14 00:53:40 · answer #8 · answered by Tristan K 2 · 0 0

i got a sister that died when i was like 5, im 20 now, i've always claimed her he's still ur brother. If u don't feel comfortable talking about him, don't.

2006-08-14 01:12:19 · answer #9 · answered by luv_my_lou 4 · 0 0

a couple of options,and I speak from experience:In my case i had four brothers ,a sister,and one sister that was still born.later ,at the age of 15 I lost a brother to an accidental gunshot wound.He was killed on his wedding day.the way he died was to horrible to keep dragging up.you can either say ,for example, "I have three living brothers ,one living sister,and one brother and one sister deceased,or simply say "i have three brothers and one sister.I went through the guilt thing too,but as time goes by it will almost be automatic to answer with only the living,and you have nothing to feel guilty about..I hope this helps.THE NOVA....

2006-08-14 01:11:10 · answer #10 · answered by nastynelly 1 · 0 1

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