I lied to impress her when we first met a year ago. I finally told her the truth about it, but she doesnt know if she wants to stay or leave. But I said fine you can break up with me and i will go active in the military, and she started crying and told me not to go! And she is still wearing the ring I got her.
2006-08-13 17:41:03 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Hi..
I think, the only thing that you can, do.. is : "trying", to win her trust, back!
She probably loves you, very much..but she is disappointed, in you...
How you can do that, is not by "rushing" things, give her the space/time, she needs..
Find a way, to earn her "trust", back!
..It will be a matter of, "time", to win her back, or loose, her!
>>>>>>>
Sorry, but that is the only way://
I hope for the "both" of, you..that thinks work out, fine..
And, if they do : "Never do that again"!!!! ..
My regards!;)
>>>>>
2006-08-13 18:04:02 · answer #1 · answered by Kimberly 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
First, grow up! Relationships will not work without honesty. If you want a lasting relationship, you have to start and maintain a good foundation of TRUST. It doesn't matter how little or big the lie you told, a lie is a lie, period! So start by STOP LYING!
Second, you cannot build a relationship on THREATS! Threatening to do something to yourself or the other person in order to keep the person with you is childish and selfish. That's like having a temper tantrum when you were little because you didn't get your way. Do you honestly feel that your girlfriend wants a "baby" hanging on her arm ?
If your girlfriend decides to stay with your sorry hide after all this garbage you have put her through then there must be some real feelings for you on her part. I would suggest that you apologize (really mean it), change your attitude (drop your pride) and help your girlfriend to see that you don't want to lose her. Good Luck
2006-08-15 05:33:24 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I'll assume whatever the lie was it was pretty big for her to have to figure out whether she stays or leaves. But the only thing for you to do is to go to her and tell her that you're sorry for lying and that the only reason you did it was because you liked her so much you were going to do anything to get her to really notice you. Tell her that you told her the truth because you felt bad about it and you know that a relationship can never work when its built on lies and distrust so you had to fix that. Also tell her that you love her (if you do) and that you'll never lie to her again.
Or, if thats not your style, just let her blow off her steam. Don't egg her on with b/s like telling her its fine for her to break up with you and you will go on active duty. Cause obviously you don't want that, this **** only hurts things. But since you did, her response of crying and telling you not to go seems like a good sign that she's not going to leave (unless her friends get to her with their "advice"!), so give her some time to cool down and just let her be pissed for a while.
Dunno which is a better idea...maybe do both?
2006-08-13 17:50:00 · answer #3 · answered by mgrazus 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, you men are so strange...why do you fell the need to impress? You obviously made an impression on her in the first place otherwise she would'nt have given you the time of day! But seeing as you have told the lie, I am guessing that she feels that the whole of your year together has been based on a lie and therefore worthless. We women do not like to be lied to. It makes us suspicious and that can lead to your life being a living hell! What did you do anyway? Is it something that you can resolve over time or did you really blow it? As far as goinginto the military for active duty......isn't that a little extreme? Surely you need to sit down and really discuss this and LISTEN to what your girl has to say and heed her thoughts and act on them. Good luck
2006-08-13 17:48:25 · answer #4 · answered by lounursey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My ex-boyfriend lied to me when we first started dating too. He told me prob. 7 months later. I finally forgive him only because I was sure that he was truly sorry. As long as she knows you are sincerely sorry and won't lie again, perhaps she will be okay. Also, I don't think you should have threatened to go active in the military if she broke up with you. She still cares about you but is angry at the moment.
2006-08-13 17:44:10 · answer #5 · answered by bunny 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you tell her that the reason you lied to her was just to impress her never relizing it would get this far and that your truly sorry for misleading her and hurting her. As it goes for the military is this true or false info just to keep her around, lies ruined relationships and if you really care for her be a man and be truthful.
2006-08-21 17:03:13 · answer #6 · answered by angel_64 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
uh a relationship based on lies and a bad guilt trip because she doesnt know her feelings is not going well. Once u break someones trust, its hard as he-- to get it back...don't be a prick and guilt her into doing something that she doesnt want. Give her time to figure it out and talk to her about it in a civil manner, not like some childish boy.
2006-08-13 17:44:23 · answer #7 · answered by Melissa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
with a view to be able to restoration this you the two might desire to be keen to purpose and supply it your superb attempt. If she isn't arranged to purpose, then you definately will not be able to restoration it. If she is waiting to purpose- the mendacity might desire to give up with instantaneous consequence. you will not be able to ever desire to win back her have confidence in case you nonetheless lie. you need to provide her a ordinary apology and the promise that it will not take place back. And propose it. Admit your fault, take possession for what you probably did. She cant forgive you till you are trying this and you cant forgive your self till you do. that's by using fact till you somewhat do take duty on your man or woman self... you will in no way understand which you on my own brought about this mess, and that with the aid of that comparable intent, you may sparkling up and make superb suited this mess. in case you do not settle for it, then you definately rob your self of the flexibility and confidance to make superb suited what you probably did incorrect. you have broken her have confidence- that's a damaging factor to do to a guy or woman. it rather is mended regardless of if it rather is going to take time...and endurance and an damaging lot of not hardship-free artwork. She could be properly interior her rights to stroll away and not in any respect look back, if she does this you need to heavily have an outstanding long not hardship-free think of roughly what precisely led you to do some thing this stupid. regardless of in case you lose her, do not make a fool of your self two times with the aid of not gaining expertise of something from this occasion. you will possibly be wiser- you already are.... and with a bit of luck won't make an identical mistake two times.
2016-10-02 01:25:16 · answer #8 · answered by mcclune 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HONESTLY there is no way to fix a lie .the damage is done . but i must say you are a real catch. 1st you lie to her then when you get around to telling the truth and she decides she wants out THEN you try to make HER feel bad when you are the one who should feel bad for not being honest in the first place .
2006-08-21 05:05:11 · answer #9 · answered by Chana 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Why in the world would lie to her in the first place and now its painfull for her to know that you kept it a lie. Only time will tell man if her feelings for you is strong then you in good shape, other then that be there for her when she needs you. good luck
2006-08-13 17:43:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋