Wedding family problems?

Question

I am having a wedding Sept 9th on a Saturday. I am not wanting children to be there. How do you tell everyone nicely not to bring their kids? Also why does it take so long for people to RSVP? It is driving my crazy, I think I am becoming a Bridezilla really. My family is crazy. All I want is the prefect wedding with no problems and here it is.

Answer 1

Firstly, don't expect a perfect wedding -- there's no such thing. At every wedding, there will inevitably things that go 'wrong', so start training yourself to relax and take it all in your stride. That way, you'll actually enjoy your own wedding, which is very hard to do when you're too busy trying to make sure everything's going perfectly.

When have you set the RSVP date? Usually you have a pretty good idea of who definitely will make it, so you can start preparing in that sense. But you need to set the RSVP date at at least 2 weeks prior to the wedding to give yourself a bit of time. If there are people who you haven't heard from by the RSVP date, ask someone (perhaps your mother or one of your friends) to give those people a quick call to check whether they're attending.

People should under no circumstances bring their children, unless their children's names were explicitly listed on the invitation. If people RSVP and tell you that their children will be attending as well, be sincere and polite and say something like, "I'm really sorry, but [insert husband-to-be's name] and I have given this a lot of thought and we're asking that children not come along. I'm sorry if this inconveniences you, but there are families on both sides who have children, and we've decided against having children at the wedding" - and tell them that you hope they will still be able to make it but will understand if their parental obligations prevent their attendance.

And your family just wants you to have a nice wedding as well. Try to relax a little and enjoy the wedding for what it is -- a celebration of your relationship and your love for one another. Not a lavish Hollywood party that must be perfect in every respect.

Anyway, all the best for your marriage, and I hope you have a great time at your wedding! :o)

Answer 2

I think that the proper ettiquette is that you just don't include the children's names or 'and family' on the invitations, but it's also okay that if someone asks to just tell them straight out 'we'd rather not have children present.'

Regardless, someone will show up with kids in tow, so don't freak too much. They won't be the people that want to stay all night and party anyway.

As for the RSVP thing, I don't know. Some people never RSVP. I think it's terribly inconsiderate, because how else is the bride going to know how many people to plan for? I think the rule of thumb on this one is to plan on haveing enough food for like, 10 extra people, or something. Not really sure. If it's a fancy sit-down dinner, you could be mean and be like 'no food for you, you didn't RSVP.' It would definatley teach them to do so next time.

There's no way to make sure you'll have a perfect day. Something will go wrong, and if it's only some people who didn't RSVP showing up or a few kids being underfoot, you'll be lucky!

Try not to stress too much, you'll have a better time that way.

Answer 3

You need to chill out..What is wrong with children being at your wedding...As for the RSVP...Some people do have busy lives you aren't the only one here...You are being selfish and you need to get over it or no one will show up......Your Wedding will be perfect..but lighten up

Answer 4

my friend did the same thing at his wedding. they put no kids at the wedding, except the ring bearer and flower girl. well his cousin got mad because shes got lots of kids and braught them anyway. the wedding turned out great anyway but i think its rude for people to disregard your wishes. i would have kicked her and her kids out if i was him. just be kind on the wedding invitations and say no kids under a certain age please. if you already sent out the invitations, then you might need to call everyone and ask them nicely that its an adults only party, so that everyone can let loose and not worry about looking after there kids.
if someone didnt reserve by the date it says on there to, dont count them in and dont even bother calling them and asking them why they didnt. its there fault they didnt reserve.

Answer 5

No wedding is ever perfect, I would suggest that you get 2-3 responsible young people to entertain the kids in another room. If you are having you reception at a hotel ask them for a meeting room. If you are also staying at the hotel they may provide it at no charge. If you provide a safe entertainment for the kids your guest will love you for it. Congrats, best wishes for your special day.

Answer 6

rule number 1 - no wedding is going to be perfect.

there will be people who show up with their children regardless of what you say in the invites. I'd simply hire a couple sitters to watch the children in another room while your reception is going on; remember there will be out of town visitors and not many will have a sitter for the time they are staying to go to YOUR wedding b/c they love you.

Good luck!

Answer 7

Adults only should have been on the invitation and as far as rsvp, people don't like making commitments.

Answer 8

The perfect wedding. Will you GET OVER YOURSELF, princess? If you didn't want kids at you stupid wedding then you should have printed it on your overpriced invitations. You will NEVER, EVER, pull this off without everyone being mad, miserable, hurt or all three (and here's a clue -- the groom is the most miserable of them all. He'll never say it and you sure as hell will never ask him, will you?). Weddings are not marriage -- they are little slices of hell that every woman feels compelled to drag themselves and all of her friends into. The logic escapes me.

Answer 9

Trust me, I don't think you will be worried about how many children are at your wedding you will be too busy having a great time.

Answer 10

U shouls put adult reseption on the invite...this usally works...if someone insists on having their child..just tell them i'm sorry but i simple cannot afford to invite children to the wedding...if i allow urs to come i will have to allow everyones to come.