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1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.

2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.

3. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.

4. You burn your yard rather than mow it.

5. You think "The Nutcracker" is something you do off the high dive.

6. The Salvation Army declines your furniture.

7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it.

8. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.

9. You come back from the dump with more than you took.

10. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.

11. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.

12. Your grandmother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.

13. You keep flea and tick soap in the shower.

14. You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.

15. You go to the stock car races and don't need a program.

16. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.

7. You have a rag for a gas cap.

18. Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.

19. You wonder how service stations keep their restroom's so clean.

20. You can spit without opening your mouth.

21. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.

22. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

23. You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say "Cool Whip" on the side.

24. The biggest city you've ever been to is Walmart.

25. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.

26. You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.

27. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $100,000 worth of improvements.

28. You've used a toilet brush to scratch your back.

29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty.

30. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65.

31. If your family tree doesn't branch.....

2006-08-13 14:53:34 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music Jokes & Riddles

Before you whine and complain about what I post here, please read my profile.

2006-08-13 15:56:19 · update #1

9 answers

That was great. I was laughing the whole time I read it.

2006-08-13 15:44:27 · answer #1 · answered by usa_grl15 4 · 0 0

That wasn't a question. If was a collection of mostly old jokes that I laughed at years ago when they first showed up on TV. They are kind of stale by now but still worth re-reading but they sure are not questions.

2006-08-13 22:00:21 · answer #2 · answered by Rich Z 7 · 0 0

LOL. Yep. LOL.

tut!tut! Some people's kinfolks! heeheehee.

2006-08-14 15:18:49 · answer #3 · answered by jfmm 7 · 0 0

Hecky naw lol

2006-08-13 21:58:08 · answer #4 · answered by ♥Loving*Steph♥ 2 · 0 0

go to your family reunion looking for a bride

2006-08-13 22:01:06 · answer #5 · answered by uofsmike 4 · 0 0

When you cut the grass and find your car...

2006-08-13 22:04:53 · answer #6 · answered by Humming Bird 2 · 0 0

ah yes but still a goodie :) ♥

2006-08-13 21:58:05 · answer #7 · answered by ♥ The One You Love To Hate♥ 7 · 0 0

good one got any more

2006-08-13 22:03:19 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

how offensive!!


j/k man, love it

2006-08-13 22:01:32 · answer #9 · answered by Chuck N 1 · 0 0

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