I've had this ongoing "casual sex" type relationship for over a year now. Only after 6 months did I stand up for myself & demand more from him. He didn't really say much..I think he was shocked to say the least. So I left right then & there..didn't talk to him for a month. After a month went by, I began to miss him, wondering what he was doing. So I called him up, he answered..now 6 months later we're back to our same old thing...w/out really talking about anything.
So now I'm kinda confused on what he might think of me. Do you think he has lost more respect for me? The only thing is that it seems like he's steppin' up his game. Like for example, if I call him, & he doesn't answer w/in a respectful time period..then when he calls I'll do the same thing, whereas before I'd probably answer on the 2nd ring. I'm trying to show him that it's not a 1 way street, I have a life too. So will switching up the routine do anything? I really like..but want to show self-respect, what do I do?
2006-08-13 13:10:11 · 18 answers · asked by feisty 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well when you got back together you should have layed down the law before giving it up again. So now you have to somehow show him what he'll be missing if he losses you. He respects you he may even love you, but he's gotten comfortable with the fact that your not bringing up the commit topic show him you mean business. But if he's really not ready for a commitment than you could lose him you have to think about that.
2006-08-13 13:20:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You keep talking about wanting respect, but you don't respect yourself enough to realize that this is a one-sided relationship. You made a good move when you stood up for yourself after 6 months, but then you went back to the same old same old. If you really "have a life too" you have a funny way of showing it. From here it looks like your life revolves around this guy with whom you only have casual sex.
2006-08-13 13:15:34 · answer #2 · answered by Nefertiti 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You start by treating yourself with some respect. First of all, stop the games. You either are in it for the sex or you sit him down and tell him what is up. No more 'w/out really talking about anything.' Stop the judgements, (you agreed to this arrangement, twice I count) and stop playing phone games. Give him your feelings or expect that you are the girl who 'comes through.' He may not even know you want anything more from him. On that note, do you?
2006-08-13 13:15:10 · answer #3 · answered by swarr2001 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Im sorry to say that I think you got cought up in your booty call.. I too did the same thing.. and I work with the guy. We think we can 'play the game', but women are more sensitive than men. It really is a mans world. They get tohave everything their way, and if we try to play by the same rules, we're whores. How unfair is that??? We woman have needs too.
Sorry I went off on my own little thing here... I think you should cut the ties, while you still can.. before you get any more caught up.. Unless you think you can handle it if one day. he dosnt answer that phone.....
2006-08-13 13:18:59 · answer #4 · answered by peewee 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want respect, don't be a casual fluke. You already set the tone for the relationship, disagreed with it later and then came back to what he will accept from you. Sex is sacred, or casual, you choose better next time.
2006-08-13 13:18:27 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you might be too addicted to the hookup with this guy to ask for a real relationship. You need to be more clear about what you need from a relationship and put it out to him and be willing to walk away if he doesn't want what you want. There are more really good fish in the ocean than it sometimes appears.
2006-08-13 13:15:29 · answer #6 · answered by HomeSweetSiliconValley 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's good you want to be respected. Every woman should.
Who knows what this guy is thinking though? But honestly, it doesn't look good. He's probably not relationship material.
It's better to start fresh with someone else. That way, right off the bat, he'll know what you want and expect.
2006-08-13 13:21:17 · answer #7 · answered by CC 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're screwed. Both figuratively and literally. If you want to get this straightened out, you need to sit him down and lay it out and be ready to walk if he isn't what you want to stick with after the end of that conversation. If you are satisfied with the talk, then you can continue, but to go as you are is emotional suicide in my humble opinion.
Good Luck
2006-08-13 13:17:10 · answer #8 · answered by Jon 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you kids grow up and stop playing games, you can worry about respect.
Right now, all the kids on the playground are laughing at you.
2006-08-13 13:13:27 · answer #9 · answered by Stuart 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your relationship is going nowhere. As long as you realize that, you can go ahead and enjoy it for what it is without worrying about respect. If you are looking for commitment, find someone else. He already knows he can have you whenever he wants.
2006-08-13 13:16:02 · answer #10 · answered by Bethany 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋