what should i do with my family?

Question

My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year, and have been friends for about 6, the problem was he used to be one of my brothers friends also. But me and my brother are very close in age and we have a lot of the same friends even today. My borhter will not talk to me or my b/f at all anymore, he seems to think that we only got together to hurt him, not b/c we really honestly have feelings for eachother, which we do. We currently live together and are so happy, but we would both like to be able to hang out with my brother again, or at least be cival with him. Also my brother is going around and trying to turn my mom and dad against us, and it is really hard to deal with them because they are so negative about our relationship...i feel like im losing my family what should I do, and leaving my b/f is not an option.

Answer 1

There is nothing you can do to stop your brother's mouth.It will take time for the rest of your family to see through his word's.Just go on living a good clean life.Keep your head up high.If you are relay in Love,thing's will work out.Just give it time.If you say,are do anything about your brother it will only give him validation.Grit your teeth and move on.I'm sure it will work out.

Answer 2

Talk to your mom first, take her out for a nice brunch and explain first your feeling towards your boyfriend and how serious you both are. then explain how hurt you feel because of your brothers action. Tell her how much you love and miss him in your life and how important it is to you for him to be there. Oh tell her how much you love her too and would love her support.
Then wait a week, then talk to your brother and get your boyfriend to do the same thing. Make sure they know how serious you and your boyfriend are about this relationship.
GOOD LUCK
PS YOUR BROTHER IS BEING SELFISH

Answer 3

your brother sounds very selfish, he should be glad that you are both happy. Send him a letter telling him about the love you have for your BF and him your brother, if that does not work, than just keep doing what your doing and be happy. Hopefully he will come around some day.
Thats all you can do. Good luck

Answer 4

sit your brother down and tell him straight out that you love him but you also still love your boyfriend and you want to be friends with him again. Ask him why he is so upset about you dating his friend and remind him he still want to be his friend.

My sister had a good friend that was a girl and when my sister started dating her brother she got upset, a few years later she came out of the closet. Just something to look for too.

Answer 5

i suggest you talk to your mom and ask for a family conference. both of you should be well-prepared for this cuz he has to show & tell both your dad and brother that he truly loves you and would take care of you. in turn, you also have to tell them that you feel the same way and you would want them to give their blessing and acceptance cuz it is very important for both of you. give your brother some time to accept this. remember, your bf was a friend to your brother first. he just might know something which you dont and he is just trying to be protective of you, if you want him to be open-minded about your relationship, you should also be open-minded about his concerns. have him air it out in the open and see how your bf would react to it. if your bf is guilty, he should ask for forgiveness and say what he has to say to make amends. if he is not guilty, just clarify. if your bf's reaction is acceptable to you, then tell everyone that its okay with you and everything is forgiven. doing these civilly and calmly would win the admiration, respect and acceptance of your family.

and remember...for the family conference,,,timing is very important. make sure the appointed time is very convenient and stress free for everyone. good luck and i hope everything works well for you and your family.

and i commend you for painstakingly trying to win the acceptance of your family and recognizing their importance in your life. we can change bfs and husbands anytime but we only have one family in our lifetime !

Answer 6

talk with your b/f and come up with a plan calmly try to talk to ur brother and say the truth and what u think if that doesn't work then ask a close friend

Answer 7

talk to your parents first explain how you feel parents always love their children no matter what. tell them you have to be free to live youyr life and that you need to know even if they dpont aghree with your choices they will always support you. then go talk to your brother alone. tell him you miss him and you never wanted to hurt him you just couldnt help who you fell in love with. you miss him being in your lives and you need him there so is there anything you can do to fix whats going on? good luck i wish you well and your family may be upset with thingd but they do always love you.

Answer 8

Time is the answer, be patient and later try to talk to your brother what are the reason to be mad at you and your boyfriend. He may have a good reason or not... but talk.

Answer 9

manda, i do think your brother needs professional help (psychologist). and anyway, why does he think you're doing this to hurt him? talk to your parents, explain them what's going on and let them know it's important for you to have them supporting you. also, tell them to help you make your bro understand what's really going on. watch out, your brother may feel like now you're the one turning your parents against him. you've been sacrificng a lot, but sometimes you gotta think about yourself. good luck!

Answer 10

I sense this is about money and prospects for money. Anyway, there are things you haven't said, without which appropriate advice cannot be given.

I would encourage you to seek advice from someone who knows more than you have shared with us.

Good luck & good life!