i left my ex 4 months ago becoz we have no future.am over him. i heard he's getting married and i called to see how he is. it turns out he is not over me at all. and he said it many times indirectly, he approached again many times and i cant resist , coz i still think highly of him and care about him.. so what do i dooooooo???
2006-08-13 06:19:23 · 55 answers · asked by The cute Anonymous 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
crash the wedding
2006-08-13 06:21:23 · answer #1 · answered by luv2bawitch 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Let me ask you something: if a guy is getting married in a situation where he isn't over someone else, where he hasn't made a choice to love only his [future] wife - and love is a choice, not a feeling - then what are the chances he's going to really put his wife first when he marries her, and be faithful to her?
Quite frankly, it does not at all bode well for his marriage that he hasn't put his head in order regarding all his other relationships. That should have been done before he even discussed marriage with her, much less got engaged.
So if I were in your shoes, even if he were to split up with her, I would still consider him unsuitable and make sure not to feed any attachment to him. He is indeed someone with whom you have no future - so feeding an attachment with him would just be leading the guy on. If you can't resist his attention, then this would be worth cutting off all contact with him.
You are a precious creature of God, made in His image, and you deserve the respect of having a man who will really put you first - above everyone except God, including Mom and Dad, much less anyone else - and make a permanent commitment to you and only you, in front of people so he's accountable. And your future husband deserves that from you as well.
So wait for a situation like that to develop, when both you and the man in question (whoever he turns out to be) are ready to do that, before you get emotionally involved with anyone again. No point in taking steps towards a relationship of oneness unless you are 100% sure that's what you want with that person (i.e. you've found the right person and gotten engaged).
I wish you all the best - may God bless you!
2006-08-13 06:35:38 · answer #2 · answered by songkaila 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It depends on what you want out of the relationship. You said that the two of you have no future. Then why pursue it? How long were you together? Why didn't you both get engaged? After 4 months with someone new, he's ready to marry her, why? Do you want yo be the other woman or the only woman? These are questions you should ask yourself. Relationships reach a peak and they progress into a long term commitment or you go your separate ways. You dumped him for a reason.
2006-08-13 06:25:01 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
FANTASTIC! You're so full of it! YOU left him because he had no future and "i am over him" so what's the problem? He didn't beg you to come back! That's the problem. You know you're done with this guy, but you havent found anyone new and he beat you to it. STOP BEING SELFISH AND LET THE GUY HAVE A GOOD LIFE! Congratulate him, buy the couple a wedding gift and if you can muster up enough class, go to the wedding(if you're invited) and maybe you'll meet a new match there.
2006-08-13 06:37:12 · answer #4 · answered by Don Ricardo 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
1. This guy is engaged and still "playing around" with you? This is the type of guy you want? If he will do this sh*it with you he will do it to you! How can you trust him?
2. If he still has all these feelings for you why doesn't he just call off his engagement and get back together with you?
3. Move on and leave this guy alone! He is not serious about you or the girl he is engaged to! You can do better! Why would you want to share a man? Please move on! I see heartache in your future if you don't!
2006-08-13 06:28:26 · answer #5 · answered by strawberries 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just move on. You are probably over him anyway,but like the idea of him pining for you, when he's about to get married. It didn't work the first time for a reason and likely won't , so you admitted you called after you heard about the upcoming wedding and not before to simply check on him.
2006-08-13 06:25:19 · answer #6 · answered by consigliere 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Let him know you are over him and let him get married and move on. You probably shouldn't have called him and started everything up again. How would you feel if you found out your fiance had been speaking to his ex? Let them go live their lives and remember why you left him in the first place.
2006-08-13 06:22:22 · answer #7 · answered by Me 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Interesting that you called him after you left him 4 months ago. Do you think that perhaps he is inferring from this that you still like him. Do you still him? He needs to sort out this marriage thing first, if he wants the relationship with you. He cant have both.
2006-08-13 06:24:48 · answer #8 · answered by Gilligan W 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to talk to his fiance...he shouldn't be marrying her. How unfair would that be to her if he feels the way he does about you? If you are over him and have no future, why are you considering being with him? The only thing you should be doing is telling him to take care of his pending marriage....he should only be marrying someone if he has feelings the way he does for you. Once he takes care of this, then reevaluate your feelings towards him.....when he is free.
2006-08-13 06:25:35 · answer #9 · answered by Geez Louise 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are over him then you should be able to resist even if you think highly of him.
I don't understand why you think that thinking well of someone means that you can't resist his advances.
He is the one with the problem, he can't seem to get over you, he is the one getting married after only four months.
2006-08-13 06:23:41 · answer #10 · answered by grandnational_man 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honey, don't get yourself involved with him again.. at least not right now. If he is stupid enough to get married while he still has feelings for you then why would you want to get caught up in that mess? And he might just be telling you those things to your face so that you aren't focused on the fact that he is GETTING MARRIED TO SOMEONE ELSE!!!
2006-08-13 06:24:20 · answer #11 · answered by Btieti 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋