Where do atheists find comfort when they lose a loved one?

Question

Please understand I do not mean this to belittle anyone. I have recently lost someone dear to me and I lean heavily on God and my faith during this loss. I am just curious as a result as to where if anywhere athesits find comfort. Please forgive my asking if it is offensive please do not post.And if I have hurt anyone who may be facing this today please know that is not my intention and I am sorry.
Peace Be With You,
Debra

Can I not wonder about others faith or practice or support structure without having a reason other than curiosity?

Thank you everyone for your polite and informative posts. I am pleased to see that we all have found ways to deal with loss.

Answer 1

Wow, that first answer was so off topic....

Atheists find comfort in their friends and family, just like everyone else.

I am sorry to hear of your loss.

***************

Debra, Isn't curiosity the basis of all things that are wondered about? Don't worry. It's all good.

Answer 2

I sometimes wish I had faith, it would be a great comfort in times of stress and sorrow. But, I don't, it seems I can't. I'm not really interested in it any more, though, (faith I mean)

When I loose someone I love, which happens more frequently as we age, I lean on those I have left to love, and trust that time will heal this injury as it does all others.

Seems to be working so far. Hope I helped.

Answer 3

Hi Debra, I'm a fellow Christian, but I wanted to answer your question because I just lost my uncle three days ago. I do not know for sure if he was a believer or not, so I have prayed for his soul all weekend. I had a thought, that possibly non-believers will face God and have a final chance to accept Jesus before their final judgement, because I truly believe that God does not want to lose any of us, and I will continue praying on this thought for a while. I'm sorry for your loss, I'll be praying for you :)

Answer 4

I lost my father when I was 15. I went through the "mourning process" like everyone else. I found my comfort in the arms of my family and friends. There were moments when I acted out with unexpected anger and tears, but I recovered.

Now I'm going through a divorce, and it is enormously painful. I just keep going with the awareness that my discomfort will not be permenant and that I need to take care of myself until the oain recedes.

Answer 5

It's not a matter of finding comfort. Speaking for myself it is just a matter of understanding that it is part of the cycle of life. I've found from experience that I take close losses much better than religious friends and family because, as in your case, it causes a question of faith doubling the stress.

Answer 6

We atheists find comfort in our fellow human beings, especially in our family and friends, and in the beauty of nature. When my father died I found my strength from my mother, my sister, my husband, my baby daughter and my friends. I was able to find peace, despite my immense sadness, when looking at a flowing river, thinking about how all things return to the Earth. This is an excellent question, Debra, and not offensive at all.

Answer 7

First of all, we are realistic. We know that every one of us will die. We take what comfort we can from the memories of a good life lived, from the love of those we still have with us, and from the determination to make the most of the life we have left to us. In my own case, in my most recent loss, I took comfort in seeing death as the end of a long period of senseless suffering. It has always puzzled me how people with a belief in God can take comfort from his existence when He (according to believers) is all powerful, and therefore could prevent so much of the suffering in the world.

Answer 8

by understanding,these things just happen whether it be old age or someone taken from us without reason,,to be an athiest is to believe no one can make it better,no one has deliberately taken someone to sit at their right side as some tell their kids and such,,no offence but we all die,,we all get sad about it but death is a normal part of life,,death sucks for all concerned,i have lost those close to me and i didnt feel any need to find some force above to make the pain go away,,,it happens when we are ready .

Answer 9

why would you "lean on" something that doesn't exist? Better to lean on a wall or your couch back. Those at least, actually exist.
How do we find comfort? By remembering thier lives and the friendship and relationship we had with the person.
Sometimes though, we have to mourn the utter waste of time and energy they spent on thier religion. That, of course, is the saddest thing we have to remember...

Answer 10

I find comfort in the people around me and in the life the person has led. Yes, I will grieve like anyone else but I will work through that only without a deity.