Jeebus, Wasn't expecting such a quick positive response to my last question so here's another. I'm like to think of myself as a 'nice-guy' and I'm single (And I hate it!). As most of my ex's say I'm perfect I've had to question why? And I'm thinking it's my 'picky'ness. Don't get me wrong - I'm just after something more long-term than most. I don't DO 'pulling'. If I want to sleep with someone - I'll wait till at least 3rd date. I also tend to avoid promiscuous women. (I like to think i'm something special.) Problem being - Where to meet the other types of people when the main places I hang out are the gay village (Due to work & friends. I live in Manchester.) or at the local rock clubs. The girls that like me, I don't seem to like and the girls I like seem to be gay. Ho-hum. Am I my own worst enemy?
LukeyM
www.myspace.com/zombiworkshop
http://www.okcupid.com/profile?u=LukeyM
2006-08-13 02:56:42 · 25 answers · asked by LukeyM 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You are not your own worst enemy, and you aren't picky, just selective.
If you know what it is that you want, then don't settle for anytthing less until you find her.
Now, I doubt that you will find her in a club.
So, where do you meet her?
1)Join a health club: solves two problems; you'll become less of a couch potato and more fit. Think of all the people you will meet. The friends you meet here will most likely be healthy, athletic and attractive. You'll look better and feel better at the same time.
2)Take a class, any class: again a two in one tactic; you'll learn something new and make new friends with similar interests. Conversation is easier if you have something in common.
3)Go to Museums: Many museums have special events and members only events. Become a member and meet lots of cultured people.
4)Got to sporting events: Go to sporting events of any kind; soccer, football, basketball, etc. Go to professional games or college games, guaranteed to have fun.
5)Go to Flea Markets and Antique Shows: While you're browsing the finds, you can people watch.
6)Play a Sport: Have you ever wanted to play soccer after watching a game on TV? Lots of towns have adult sport programs. Volleyball and tennis are common town recreational sports you could join.
7)Join a Book Club: Check this out at your local library. Reading books and sharing them is another great way to get to know people.
8)Join a Singles Group: Self-explanatory, there are many singles organizations out there that plan singles dances, get-aways, etc.
9)Volunteer: Help build houses for Habitat for Humanity; give out beverages at marathons, or join one of the many volunteer organizations.
10)Have a Party: Invite your friends and have them invite two friends and so on and so on.
11)Learn a craft: take craft classes at your local community center.
12)Join a Business Association: If you are a professional, join your local association. Network for your business and your personal life.
13)Go to High School/College Reunions: A great way to reconnect with your old best friend!
14)Get a Dog and Walk Everywhere: go to parks and the beach with your dog. Dogs are great people meeters!
15)Go to every Party you are invited to: even if you don't want to go...go. You never know who you'll meet.
16)Join an Investment Club: make money and friends!
17)Travel: go to the islands; Europe; talk to everyone. Learn about their culture.
18)Go to seminars: lots of people go to seminars alone; great place to start a conversation.
19)Go to Wine Tastings: sometimes local restaurants have a wine-tasting night.
20)Go skiing, snowmobiling, snowboarding
21)Take a yoga, Tai Chi class: relieve tensions and meet other enlightened people.
22)Get a new job: Is your job boring, going nowhere, maybe you need a change. A new job is a great place to make some new relationships.
23)Join a women's or men's group
24)Take up acting; go to acting workshops, help create scenery.
25)Talk to everyone, everywhere
As you can see, these are not difficults methods.
Good luck !
2006-08-13 02:59:09 · answer #1 · answered by Angela 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why do you hate being single? There's nothing wrong with being single, in lots of ways it's easier than being in a relationship. You sound like a really nice guy and you are your own best friend not your own worst enemy. You're just protecting yourself from potential harm by being with the wrong mate hence your pickyness. I say keep to your values and the right girl will come along - you're in no hurry and you have good friends so just chill out and enjoy your single life - oh and manchester rocks!!
2006-08-13 03:09:20 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you have it about right, who would want to stay with someone who would sleep with you on the first night, I'd be wondering if that was the 'norm' for them. So... They say the more you look the less you see (whoever 'they' are). Stop looking is my answer. You're not picky at all, or your own worst enemy, you're just realistic about what you want and thats not someone who's been around the block every night for a month. Good luck!
2006-08-13 03:08:45 · answer #3 · answered by Just Moi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are fine. There's nothing wrong with not wanting "fast women" Try looking in places you don't expect to meet them. Don't look in the bars and clubs. Go to the laundry mat, grocery store.........(my friend does his grocery shopping day to day so that he can go to the grocery store everyday)
I am not sure what you have around you but I know I met a lot of really nice people in the park (in Chicago) while walking my dog. Just try to stay away from the "meat markets" when looking for relationships. You ll be fine. There's truly is nothing wrong with respecting yourself........
2006-08-13 03:06:33 · answer #4 · answered by ttazevert 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you are not your own worst enemy, it is just that you have great standards and it is going to take a awhile to meet someone who respects themselves as much as you respect yourself. I can say that you will probably meet her through a friend or it will happen quite unexpectedly (grocery store, local rock club for the first time, etc)
2006-08-13 03:05:14 · answer #5 · answered by firecracker 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
were all our own worst enemy, but the thing is dnt worry urself about it, u are who u are dnt go changing the way u are just to try n attract girls, ne woman that says a mans too perfect needs there head checking, for one there is no perfect person neway n we all have our own faults but secondly if u really are the perfect man what the hells the problem!!!!! that aint a bad thing, id love to have the perfect guy along wit probly most of the women in this world, maybe the problem is u need to chill out just a bit. but most of all jus dnt worry, obviously your exs dnt appreciate u as much as they should of done, i mean i dunno but thats wot i reckon n u just havent found the right person yet. good luck. x
2006-08-13 03:06:22 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
HEHE you seem to be looking in the wrong area girl gay bar , well there you go. I tend to do the same thing. I'm a lot older than you I allways treat ladies the way they want to be treated. You can't loose. Keep your moral codes you might have to look at bars that cater to both sexes. You might have to weed out the bad ones. good luck.
2006-08-13 03:05:03 · answer #7 · answered by thresher 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't call waiting till the 3rd date before sleeping with someone a long time.
You will meet someone when the time is right. I'm a great believer in fate.
2006-08-13 03:04:55 · answer #8 · answered by chelsea19622000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
definetly not u shouldnt think like that theres plenty of girls out there waiting for love ull find someone u wanna be w/ someday so dont give up and keep looking always keep ure chin up and smile dont always let people see what ure thinking by the expression on ure face try and be at least a little mysterius give it time itll happen hang in there
2006-08-13 03:03:22 · answer #9 · answered by skflaramee 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YES! YES! AND YES!. a persons worse enemy is himself because the greatest problemy the every individual faces is the problem in him, They tend to go for friend friends advice but if in him he asked for an advice and yet he is not open then what for. It is you who can answer this. Because you know yourself most, than any other person may do.
2006-08-13 03:01:43 · answer #10 · answered by a comedian yet very sensous man. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋