Satan(his exact words): You humans are dumbf%&Ks , but thats why I love f&%king with you. The dumbest mother f%$kers I met on earth are satanists and next to those, athiests. You should see the expression their faces when they see me down in hell, its f#$king priceless(laughing). Yes your world is ending and I have one more battle to win. I spend most my time watching your human females in showers, my demon-servants really reak the havoc on your pathetic race.(Satan left my room through a closed window) Note: This is an actual account.
2006-08-13 00:50:53 · 16 answers · asked by icyhott4urmind 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
I had a conversation something like that once but it wasn't with Satan. It was with a being from another dimension. Perhaps the bottle of Scotch I had the night before had something to do with it. He too left through a closed window but I had to remind him to take his pink elephants with him.
2006-08-13 01:20:56 · answer #1 · answered by whyme? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old are you?
That shower thing sounds more like an adolecent fantasy than a sinister demon.
In ancient Jewish tradition Satan is simply an angel doing the work that God assigned to Satan to do.
The word Satan means challenger. With the idea of Satan challenging us, or tempting if you will. This description sees Satan as the angel who is the embodiment of man's challenges. This idea of Satan works closely with God as an integral part of God plan for us. His job is to make choosing good over evil enough of a challenge so that it becomes clear to us that there can be only one meaningful or logical choice.
Contrast this to Christianity, which sees Satan as God's opponent. In Jewish thought, the idea that there exists anything capable of setting itself up as God's opponent would be considered polytheistic or setting up the devil to be an equally powerful polarity to god or a demigod.
Oddly, proof for The Christian satan/devil mythology is supposedly found in the ancient Jewish texts that were borrowed to create the bible. One can’t help but wonder how Christians came up with such a fantastically different interpretation of Gods assistant Satan in their theology.
Other hints about Satan’s role in human relations can be seen if you look at the name Lucifer. It meaning in the original tongue translates as Light bearer or light bringer. Essentially the bringer of enlightenment. The temptations of the Satan idea bring all of us eventually into Gods light. Hardly the Evil entity of Christian mythology.
Love and blessings
don
2006-08-13 00:56:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
All you need to do is accept Christ to dwell in your heart. Then you will be saved and Satan can't reach you or do you harm. If you believe in your heart that Jesus died on the cross for all your sins, past, present, and future, and confess that with your mouth, i mean say that you believe in your heart before someone else, then you are saved. Simple, isn't it? But thet how it should be- simple, so all the people can be saved. Do it quickly. He can't hurt you. And he's not gonna win the last battle. It's written in the bible. Revelations.
2006-08-13 01:02:23 · answer #3 · answered by Stella 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oooo... I get it... this is a subtlely worded warning against Satanism and atheism. Wow! It's so very cleverly done that I almost missed it at first. It bears all the sophistication of a classic Chick tract.
2006-08-13 01:00:00 · answer #4 · answered by XYZ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do realize, don't you, that our questions and answers here on Yahoo are ETERNALLY recorded somewhere, somehow and that every employer, every future girlfriend, every child of yours, every friend and every enemy that you will EVER have will eventually have easy access to every word that you just said above this day at this time in your really pathetic adolescence. Who gonna give someone like YOU a job, boy, after they read this? Sucker.
2006-08-13 01:04:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
How did you recognize the satan? I think it was the satan within you speaking!
2006-08-13 01:06:19 · answer #6 · answered by Olive 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i love it very a lot.....quite the first one. “i think as if I’m damaged and that i don’t comprehend what to do And my emotions . . . my emotions ain’t that properly. favor i ought to offer them to you.” and the arguments provide good cases for examining. do you practice writing one act performs? i hit upon it some thing very interesting at the moment to involove myself in...giving existence to new characters and making them talk from their hearts...making them stay and under no circumstances go back back from our levels.
2016-11-30 00:44:09 · answer #7 · answered by littell 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW! I've heard of such things! I'm sure that will be an experience you will never forget
2006-08-13 01:24:47 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seek therapy.
2006-08-13 00:56:44 · answer #9 · answered by Paul H 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get back on your meds Dud !
2006-08-13 00:54:08 · answer #10 · answered by Terry S 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋